THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
When we begin to take our failures non-seriously,
we are ceasing to be afraid of them.
We must learn to laugh at ourselves.
~Katherine Mansfield
____________
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
I have to admit to getting older. Admittedly, temps
are still a bit chilly around here, (yesterday
it was 55 degrees) but I have been "remiss" in the
recognition of warmer days and etc. usually
every year by now, I have been
down to the local ice cream stand for a bannana split.
One bannana split per summer and always at the
beginning of summer to mark its start.
Unfortunately,the ice cream stand up on the corner
closed up and was torn down last year, because
the land was worth more than the business. And its
a parking lot now. And you know, out of sight out
of mind, I forgot about the tradition.
Anyways, the next nearest place to
buy ice cream is a few miles away. And it is NOT
an icecream stand. But that is
another story. I do believe ice cream stands
do not exist in this town any more.
When we first moved to this neighborhood
in 1980, the war department and me could buy a
bannana split for 75 cents. Last year when summer
was here, I had to go a few miles away to find
a bannana split. It really was a gift shop/
boutique/restaurant that happened to sell ice
cream. And it really was not a bannana split either.
Just a dish of ice cream with a few slices of a
half a bannana on the top. And it cost me a little
over four bux. In 1980, a 'good split' had four
whole slices(2 bannanas sliced down the middle.)
3 mounds of ice cream, choc, strawberry and vanilla,
along with with the good toppings.
Sigh, I road around town the other day looking for
a ice cream stand. The war department refused to
accompany me on my gluttonous quest, she is much
wiser in her older years and refuses to partake
in such evil activities. So when
I returned home with an empty stomach,
she smiled sweetly and sat me
down with carrots and celary,patting my back,
congratulating me on my great ability to overcome
the "weaknesses of the flesh."
Alas, sometimes old traditions
are better left to memories.
But that's another story.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
______________
THE COMICS
quick grow
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y050.html
temporary
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y051.html
lie still
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y052.html
bright side
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y053.html
oh boy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y054.html
holy shit
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y055.html
a legman
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y056.html
what do you think
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y057.html
the cat
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y058.html
more about that cat
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y059.html
_____________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
The Norwegian alpine ski team dancing
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9570.html
Nashville Tennessee Flood 2010
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9571.html
its not a photo
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9572.html
batteries
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9573.html
_______________
POWER POINT DISPLAYS
animal celebrities
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd063.html
The Alfa Nero
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd064.html
grand mothers
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd065.html
It was visitor's day at the lunatic asylum. All the
inmates were standing in the courtyard and singing
"Ave Maria." They were singing it beautifully. But oddly,
each of them was holding a red apple in one hand and
tapping it rhythmically with a pencil. A visitor listened
in wonder to the performance and then approached the conductor.
"I am a retired choir director," he said. "This is one of the
best choirs I have ever heard.""Yes, I'm very proud of them,"
said the conductor."You should take them on tour,"
said the visitor, "what are they called?"
"Surely that's obvious," replied the conductor...
"They're the Moron Tapanapple Choir."
____________
You Might Be A Redneck If
...You've placed a personal ad in a fishing magazine.
...You've ever had a corn dog for breakfast.
...Your longest relationship was with an animal.
...Your "stock portfolio" is three sheep and a goat.
...Your one phone call from jail is to someone in another jail.
...Your tools are worth more than your car.
...You are unable to start a family due to a childhood wedgie.
...You wear cowboy boots without socks.
__________
A chicken farmer went to a local bar.... Sat next to a woman
and ordered a glass of champagne...The woman perks up and
says, 'How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!'
'What a coincidence' the farmer says. 'This is a special
day for me.... I am celebrating''This is a special day for
me too, I am also celebrating!' says the woman.'What a
coincidence!' says the farmer! As they clinked glasses the
man asked, 'What are you celebrating?''My husband and I
have been trying to have a child and today my gynaecologist
told me that I am pregnant!''What a coincidence,' says the man.
'I'm a chicken farmer and for years all of my hens were
infertile, but today they are all laying fertilized eggs.'
'That's great!' says the woman. 'How did your chickens become
fertile?''I used a different cock,' he replied.
The woman smiled and said, 'What a coincidence.'
____________
A man and his friend meet at the club house and decide to play a
round of golf together.
The man has a little dog with him and on the first green, when
the man holes out a 20 foot putt, the little dog starts to yip
and stands up on its hind legs and walks in circles.
The friend is quite amazed at this clever trick and says,
"Wow, that dog is really talented! What does he do if you miss a
putt?""Somersaults," says the man.
"Somersaults?!" says the friend, "That's incredible. How many
does he do?""Hmmm," says the man.
"That depends on how hard I kick him."
____________
A notorious womanizer left a trail of broken hearts behind him,
until he betrayed the wrong woman, a practicing witch. The
morning after she had caught ICE-Man with another girl, he
awoke with an itchy bump in the middle of his forehead.
ICE-Man thought it was a pimple, but it continued to grow to
ridiculous proportions throughout the day.
In a panic, ICE-Man sought the advice of a physician who
examined the man and ran tests on the strange tissue. By now,
the bump was three inches long, and starting to take an
oddly familiar shape."What is this thing growing out of my
head Doctor?", asked ICE-Man."We've run every test we know
to confirm the findings," he said gravely, "but they all tell
us the same thing. The bump in your forehead is developing
into a fully grown penis.""I can't believe this! Isn't there
anything you can do?" pleaded a distraught ICE-Man.
"I'm afraid not. Removing it would kill you."
"I'll be a freak! No woman will come near me!" cried ICE-Man
"There's more," said the Doctor. "You're going to experience
vision problems.""Will I go blind, Doc?" asked ICE-Man.
"No, you'll just have trouble seeing with testicles
hanging in front of your eyes."
BUFFALO BILL
Wild Crashes
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7821.htm
Wireless Headset
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7822.htm
Women Fights Robber
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7823.htm
_______________
SydesJokes Video Clips
Meteor Crash
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000954.html
Microsofts Second Commercial With Jerry Seinfeld And Bill Gate
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000955.html
Microwave Man
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000956.html
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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