THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
If you could kick the person in the pants responsible
for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month.
Theodore Roosevelt, 1858 - 1919
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
The house is very quiet, and I must admit, in
the wee hours of the morning I feel a bit sad
that she is not around for a couple days. The
war deparment has gone up north to visit rela
tives, while I "vegetate" here at home. I took
a good long ride on the cycle yesterday. What
with 80 degrees it was a gorgeous ride. I was
exhausted when I got home. I crashed out like
big time. Turk the dog and I took a very long
nap. Not sure whether I shall go out again to
day or not. We will just have to wait and see.
The war department will be home late tonight.
I have to admit, I don't like being a bachelor
so much:(
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_____________
THE COMICS
crabs
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a030.html
yellow pages
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a032.html
whats your problem
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a033.html
obsolete
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a034.html
I forgot
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a035.html
my daddy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a036.html
the paper
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a037.html
____________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
A fall or two
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9651.html
3 stooges
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9652.html
Little Green Man
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9653.html
learning cpr can be fun
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9654.html
catch phrase
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9655.html
bannanas in Japan
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9656.html
_______________
POWER POINT DISPLAYS
life on the train
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd098.html
Central Park
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd099.html
speed test
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/pdd100.html
A young woman meets her old, retired, parish priest
and when he asks her how she is, she bursts out crying.
"What's the matter child?" he asks.
"Oh, Father," she says, "it's my boyfriend. He won't
marry me because I'm Roman Catholic." "There, there
child. Here's what you do. Explain to him the faith of
the Church, the traditions, the ceremonies and the rites.
That'll bring him around." Tearfully, the young woman
says she'll try it. About a year later they meet again,
and again she bursts into tears when he asks how
she is doing. "Is it your boyfriend, child?" he asks.
"Yes, Father." "Did you explain about the Church as I
suggested?" "Yes, Father," she says, "but that was the
problem. He was so taken by it that he's now studying
to be a priest."
____________
On his honeymoon, a very thick redneck farmer, Billy
Joe, insisted on having a room at the luxury hotel
with a balcony overlooking the sea. On retiring for
the night after the wedding, his new bride emerged from
the bathroom dressed in some very sexy lingerie.
"Hey Billy Joe, come in off the balcony and see what I
have waiting for you to savor for the first time"
she said coyly. "No thanks, I want to sit out here,"
he said. So Daisy sat down brushing her golden hair for
10 minutes after which she invited Billy Joe once more
to come in off the balcony to take pleasure of her
virginal body. Once more he refused. Eventually Daisy
grew tired of waiting and she retired to the wedding bed
and fell asleep. In the morning, she awoke to find him
still sitting on the balcony. "Why did you spend the whole
night out there when you could have been making love all
night?" she asked. "Well my pa said the first night of my
marriage would be the most beautiful night of my whole life -
and I didn't want to miss a moment of it."
______________
Little Johnny was left to fix lunch. When his mother returned
with a friend, she noticed that Johnny had already strained
the tea. So the two women sipped their tea happily while
having lunch and chit-chatted. Afterwards, when her friend
had left, Little Johnny's mother talked to him. "Was it hard
finding the tea strainer in the kitchen?" his mother asked.
"Ma, I couldn't find it, so I used the fly swatter."
replied Johnny. His mother nearly fainted, so Johnny hastily
added, "Don't get excited, Ma, I used the old one!"
____________
Doug goes to a doctor and says: "Doctor, my wife
recently has lost her voice. What should I do to help
her get it back?"
The doctor replies, "Try coming home at 3 in the morning!"
____________
Two black guys are at a bar
talking, one says to
the other, "You ever notice after you have sex with a
white woman that
your eyes burn, your nose burns and you get all
teary-eyed?" The second black guy says,"Yeah, all the
time." The other says, "Why is that?"
The second says, "I think it's the pepper spray."
___________
Rodney walks into a bar and says, "Bartender, give
me two shots. One for me and one for my best buddy here."
The bartender says, "You want both drinks now or do you
want me to wait until your buddy arrives to pour his?"
Rodney says, "Oh, I want them both now. I've got my best
buddy in my pocket here." With that he pulls out a little
3 inch man from his pocket. The bartender says, "Wow!
And you mean to say he can drink that much?" "Oh, sure.
He can drink it all, and then some," the man retorted.
So the bartender poured the two shots. Sure enough,
the little guy drinks it all up. "That's amazing,"
says the bartender. "What else can he do? Can he walk?"
Rodney flicks a quarter down to the end of the bar and says,
"Hey, Al, go fetch that quarter."
The little guy runs down to the end of the bar, picks up the
quarter, and runs back down and gives it to Rodney.
The bartender is totally amazed by this display.
"That's amazing," he says, "what else can he do? Does he talk?"
Rodney looks up at the bartender with a look of surprise in his
eye and squawks, "Talk? Sure he talks. Hey Al, tell him about
that time we were in down in Africa on safari and you insulted
that witch doctor!"
_______________
BUFFALO BILL
Sensitivity Training
http://www.buffaloschips.com/898.htm
Serv 3 Chunk
http://www.buffaloschips.com/81810.htm
Sex In The Future
http://www.buffaloschips.com/81811.htm
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
MArtin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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