[PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner!



 

THE POSTMAN'S CORNER

 

Good teams become great ones
When the members trust each other
Enough to surrender the
"me" for the "we".
-- Phil Jackson

 

GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Budget fix may cost GR violators more
An additional $225 fee
Updated: Friday, 21 May 2010, 10:07 AM EDT
Published : Friday, 21 May 2010, 10:07 AM EDT

By Joe LaFurgey
GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. (WOOD) - Get popped for drunk
driving in the city of Grand Rapids, and it may cost
you more than your license. Along with the usual
fines and court fees, the city of Grand Rapids is
considering imposing an additional $225 fee.
"Imposition of a $225-per-person charge by the city
of Grand Rapids on the 700 individuals arrested by
GRPD (assuming convictions) would result in a potential
recovery to the city of $157,000 a year,"
according to a memo prepared for city commissioners
by Assistant City Attorney Margaret Bloemers.


As our fair city struggles to fill a 27 million dollar
budget short fall this year, they have come up with
several ideas to create tax revenue to fill it.
Most of them sound pretty stupid. For
once, the city has an idea here which I can actually
agree with. They can't lock them up any more because
there is no room in the jails. so hit em in the pocket
book where it hurts. go figger.

We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman


THE COMICS

inadequate
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a040.html

not tonight
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a041.html

accident
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a042.html

baby's first bath
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a043.html

wait a minute
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a044.html

Harvey never thought
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a045.html

if I were you
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a046.html

addict
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a047.html

crying
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a048.html

space
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a049.html
______________

LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
 
Arizona Sing-A-Long
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9657.html

High Five Etiquette
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9658.html

Ray Stevens - Come to the USA
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9659.html

Jack Benny's Hillbilly Band
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9660.html

mother in law
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9661.html

Motzart in the office
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9662.html
____________

POWER POINT DISPLAYS

family
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd101.html

over 40
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd102.html

the pharmacist
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd103.html

An 18-year-old suicide bomber blew himself up and
appeared before Allah. He said, "Oh, Allah, I did
your bidding, but I have a request. Since I'm only
18 and spent all my time in terrorist training
school, I never was with a woman. So, instead of
72 virgins, who also won't know what to do sexually,
can I have 72 whores?" Allah regarded him for a
moment, then replied, "Actually, the 72 virgins are
here in heaven because assholes like you murdered
them before they could experience the pleasure of
sex. So you're here to service them. Since they're
virgins, they're quite sexually ravenous; and, frankly,
you'll be on constant, exhausting duty." The bomber
responded, "Well, I guess I can live with that. How
hard can it be to keep 72 women satisfied for all
eternity?" And Allah replied, "Who said they were women?"
_____________

Why did the tomato turned red?
Because he saw the salad dressing.

Why don't blind people skydive?
Because it scares the crap out of their dogs.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he had no guts!

Why do they put bells on cows?
Because their horns don't work!

What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
Roamin' Catholic.

What did the apple say to the orange?
Nothing stupid, apples don't talk.
___________

Ron just got a new sports car and was out for
a drive when he cut off a truck driver. The
trucker motioned for Ron to pull over. When he
did, the driver got out of his truck and pulled
a piece of chalk from his pocket. He drew a
circle on the road and told Ron to stand in the
circle and not move. He then went to Ron's new
car and cut up the leather seats.When the truck
driver turned around Ron had a slight grin on his face.
"Oh, you think that's funny?" the trucker asked,
"Watch this." He got a baseball bat out of his truck
and broke every window in the car. When he turned
and looked Ron had a smile on his face. This
drove the driver into a rage.He got his knife back
out and sliced all the tires. Now Ron was laughing.
The truck driver really started to lose it. He
went back to his truck and got a can of gas, poured
it on the sports car and set it on fire. He turned
around and Ron was laughing so hard he almost fell down.
"What's so funny?" The truck driver asked him.
Ron replied, "When you weren't looking,
I stepped outside the circle 4 times."
______________

A plane hit a patch of severe turbulence and the
passengers were holding on tight as it rocked and
reeled through the night. A little old lady turned
to a minister who was sitting behind her and said,
"You're a man of God. Can't you do something about this?"
He replied, "Sorry, I can't. I'm in sales, not management.
________________

A newspaper editor offered a reward for people
who phoned in with news stories.The editor received
a call from someone saying that a truck had lost its
brakes on a hill and, after picking up great speed,
had crashed into and demolished a house.
"I'm not interested," he said. "That sort of thing
happens all the time. It's not news."
"I know what you mean, and I thought you might feel
that way, but you'll probably be more interested,"
said the caller, "when I tell you that it was your house."
____________

Two older, successful businessmen met at a resort.
One who had recently retired was describing his life,
"I get up late in the morning, have a light breakfast
And then I lie down on my Veranda for a while and relax.
In the afternoon I go inside for lunch, have a great
Salad, fruits and cold fish, then I spend the rest of
The afternoon boating or playing golf or tennis...
When it starts to get dark I have a great dinner with
The finest wines. I smoke a Cuban cigar.
Then I go lie On my Veranda again.
"The other gentleman acknowledges
That this is a life to be envied.
Later he reported the Conversation to his wife.
She asked, "What's his wife's name?"
Her husband said, "I'm not sure, but I think it's Veranda."
____________

BUFFALO BILL

Women in Boxing
http://www.buffaloschips.com/02280501.htm

Trivial Pursuit
http://www.buffaloschips.com/02280502.htm

Talented Tongue
http://www.buffaloschips.com/02280503.htm

THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman

 

 

 



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