THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
Change yourself and your work will seem different.
~N.V. Peale
____________
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
COLUMBUS, Ohio (AP) - Police in Columbus are looking
for a man they say robbed a bank near downtown,
then handed two $100 bills to passers-by as he
ran away. FBI Special Agent Harry Trombitas said
the man robbed a Huntington Bank branch early Monday
afternoon after showing a teller a gun in his waistband.
Trombitas said the man was running up the street
when he encountered a mother and daughter
window-shopping. The robber stopped and gave them
each a $100 bill, assured them it was real,
then kept running. the mother and daughter from the
Cleveland area were in town for a visit to Ohio State
Its nice to know that there are still people out there
who want to be a Robin Hood. You know, I have stood
on street corners waiting all my life, and I have YET
to have anybody walk by and hand me a hundred dollar
bill. There is still hope. Sigh, of course, if someone
actually did that? The cops would probably make me give
it back:(
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
____________
THE COMICS
hang on
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y020.html
cheech and chong
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y021.html
pictures
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y022.html
cold
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y023.html
danger
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y024.html
employment
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y025.html
check it out
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y026.html
quit complaining
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y027.html
craving
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y028.html
______
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
the pole
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9552.html
construction
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9553.html
seahorses
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9554.html
a shitty day at the gym
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9555.html
Parkinson's
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9556.html
greatest play in baseball history
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9557.html
buy you a drink
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9558.html
______________
POWER POINT DISPLAYS
big girls
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd053.html
paper
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd054.html
best husband
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd055.html
This middle-aged guy wakes up one morning and notices
that his eyes are bulging and his ears are protruding.
He becomes very concerned. So he goes to his doctor
and asks him what is wrong with him. The doctor told
him that he has a rare disease that will require him
to take this medication for several months to clear
up the disease, however the medication will make his
hair fall out permanently.Several months later the
guy's eyes are still bulging and his ears are still
protruding, more so now that his hair is gone. So
this time he goes to a different doctor who informs
him that he has a liver problems and that they will
have to remove part of his liver. So the guy has the
surgery only to find out months later, his eyes are
still bulging and his ears are still protruding.
Determined to find out what is wrong with him he goes
to another doctor who tells him that the nerves in his
hands are pinching the nerve endings in his ears and
his eyes and the only way to resolve the problem is
to have his hands amputated.Sadly, the guy lets his
hands be amputated. Months later, the man still has
the problem. He goes to another specialist who informs
him that the cause is a rare blood disease and that
the man only has a few months to live. The guy is
hysterical at this point and resolves that if
he only has months to live he is going to live it up.
So he goes out to buy a brand new sports car, new
furniture, and a new wardrobe.However, when he went
to order some custom shirts, the tailor told him he
took a 17-inch neck."No, I've always taken a 15-inch
neck.""But sir, you have a 17-inch neck."
"Listen - I'm 45 years old, and for the past 30 years
I've taken a 15- inch neck."
"Okay, I'll do it. But you do know what happens when
the neck is too small?"
"What?"
"It makes your eyes bulge and your ears protrude."
___________
A mini-skirted, totally blonde, Valley Girl sashayed
over to her blind date and said, "Like dude, I want
you to totally screw my brains out."
"Sorry," he replied, "I'm not into quickies."
___________
Q: What's the difference between Obama and his dog, Bo?
A: Bo has papers.
Q: What was the most positive result of the "Cash for
clunkers" program?
A: It took 95% of the Obama bumper stickers off the road.
_____________
A young engineer was leaving the office at 3.45 p.m. when
he found the Acting CEO standing in front of a shredder
with a piece of paper in his hand. "Listen," said the
Acting CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important
document, and my secretary is not here. Can you make
this thing work?" "Certainly," said the young engineer.
He turned the machine on, inserted
the paper, and pressed the start button.
"Excellent, excellent!" said the Acting CEO as his
paper disappeared inside the machine,
"I just need one copy."
____________
Pick up lines
1) Did you fart? cuz you just blew me away.
2) Are yer parents retarded? cuz ya sure are special.
3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea.
I just can't hold it in.
4) Do you have a library card?
cuz I'd like to sign you out
5) Is there a mirror in yer pants?
cuz I can see myself in em.
6) If you was a tree & I was a squirrel, I'd store my nuts
in yer hole.
7) You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty's
only a light switch away.
8) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make
yer bed rock.
9) Yer eyes are as blue as winder cleaner.
10) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin,
we kin sleep til afternoon.
AND.. the best for last!
11) Yer face reminds me of a wrench, every time
I think of it, my nuts tighten up.
_________________
Deep in the back woods, of Letcher County Kentucky
a hillbilly's wife went into labor in the middle of
the night, and the doctor was called out to assist
in the delivery. Since there was no electricity, the
doctor handed the father-to-be a lantern and said,
'Here. You hold this high s o I can see what I am doing!'
Soon, a baby boy was brought into the world.
'Whoa there', said the doctor, 'Don't be in such a
rush to put that lantern down I think theres another one coming.'
Sure enough, within minutes he had delivered a baby girl.
'Hold that lantern up, don't set it down there's
another one!' Said the doctor. Within a few minutes he had
delivered a third baby 'No, don't be in a hurry to put
down that lantern, it seems theres yet another
one coming!' cried the doctor.
The redneck scratched his head in bewilderment,
and asked the doctor, .. . . .
'You reckon it might be the light that's attractin' 'em?'
___________
Times are tuff...
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE...
Brake company on the skids?
-
Bra manufacturers that went bust?
-
Surgeon who was forced to take a cut in his salary?
-
Cigarette company that went up in smoke?
-
Baker who was short of dough?
-
Refrigerator manufacturer that had it's assets frozen?
-
Corset firm that felt the squeeze?
-
Upholsterers that couldn't cover their costs?
-
Adhesive tape company that got into a sticky situation?
_____________
BUFFALO BILL
blind nurses
http://www.buffaloschips.com/qwbbgd.htm
blind painter
http://www.buffaloschips.com/kl;l;;;ppkmm.htm
blind man 2
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jsfjsdhjbxafkgj.htm
_____________
SydesJokes Video Clips
Mcdonalds - Fat Ass Meal
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000945.html
McDonalds Cat
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000946.html
McDonalds Fishes
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000947.html
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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