THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
The secret of success is to know
something nobody else knows.
Aristotle Onassis
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Its a quiet Sunday morning.
nothing much to say
But we do have an important public service
announcement from the American dental association:
nothing much to say today so lets get into
the jokes!
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_________
THE COMICS
call you back
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a050.html
silly ass
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a051.html
mama made me promise
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a052.html
somewhere out there
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a053.html
when I get there
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a054.html
arab marriage
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a055.html
enlightenment
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a056.html
that is a long coma
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a057.html
at the party
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a058.html
today's fitness craze
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a059.html
_____________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
3 stooges...You Nazty Spy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9663.html
WW II : RARE COLOR FILM : AIRCRAFT CARRIER IN THE PACIFIC
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9664.html
Lost Generation
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9665.html
fetch
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9666.html
laser prank
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9667.html
blind crickette player
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9668.html
police vs alligator
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9669.html
___________
POWER POINT DISPLAYS
unusual pics
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd104.html
knock knock joke
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd105.html
bachelor life
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd106.html
Nun and a Priest were crossing the Sahara desert
on a camel. On the third day out, the camel
suddenly dropped dead without warning. After dusting
themselves off, the Nun and the Priest surveyed their
situation. After a long period of silence, the Priest
spoke. 'Well,Sister, this looks pretty grim.'
'I know, Father. In fact, I don't think it likely that
we can survive more than a day or two..' 'I agree,'
says the Father. 'Sister, since we are unlikely to make
it out of here alive, would you do something for me?'
'Anything, Father..'
'I have never seen a woman's breasts and I was wondering
if I might see yours.' 'Well, under the circumstances I
don't see that it would do any harm.'
The Nun opened her habit and the Priest enjoyed the
sight of her shapely breasts, commenting frequently
on their beauty. 'Sister, would you mind if I touched them?'
she consented and he fondled them for several minutes.
'Father, could I ask something of you?' 'Yes, Sister?'
I have never seen a man's penis. Could I see yours?'
'I suppose that would be OK,' the Priest replied lifting his robe.
'Oh Father, may I touch it?'
The priest consented and after a few minutes of fondling
he was sporting a huge erection. 'Sister, you know that if
I insert my penis in the right place, it can Give Life.'
'Is that true Father?' 'Yes, it is, Sister.''Oh Father,
that's wonderful ... Stick it in the camel and
let's get the hell out of here!'
____________
Dorothy and Edna, two "senior" widows, are talking.
Dorothy: "That nice George Johnson asked me out for a
date. I know you went out with him last week, and I
wanted to talk with you about him before I give him my answer."
Edna: "Well, I'll tell you. He shows up at my apartment
punctually at 7 P.M., dressed like such a Gentleman in a
fine suit, and he brings me such beautiful flowers!
Then he takes me Downstairs, and what's there but a luxury
car... A limousine, uniformed chauffeur and all. Then he
takes me out for dinner... A marvelous dinner... Lobster,
champagne, dessert, and after-dinner drinks. Then we go
see a show. Let me tell you, Dorothy, I enjoyed it so much
I could have just died from pleasure! So then we are
coming back to my apartment and he turns into an ANIMAL.
Completely crazy, he tears off my expensive new dress
and has his way with me two times!"
Dorothy: "Goodness gracious!... So you are telling me I
shouldn't go out with him?"
Edna: "No, no, no... I'm just saying, wear an old dress."
_______________
A very well-built young lady was lying on her psychiatrist's
couch, telling him how frustrated she was. "I tried to be
an actress and failed," she complained.
"I tried to be a secretary and failed; I tried being a
writer and failed; then I tried being a sales clerk and I
failed at that, too." The shrink thought for a moment and
said... "Everyone needs to live a full, satisfying life.
Why don't you try nursing?" The girl thinks about this,
then bares one of her large, beautiful breasts, points it
at the shrink, and says... "Well go ahead, I'll give it a try!"
___________
A woman went to her doctor for a follow-up visit after
the doctor had prescribed testosterone for her. She was a
little worried about some of the side effects she was
experiencing. "Doctor, the hormones you've been giving me
have really helped, but I'm afraid that you're giving me
too much. I've started growing hair in places that I've
never grown hair before." The doctor reassured her. "A little
hair growth is a perfectly normal side effect of testosterone.
Just where has this hair appeared?"
"On my balls."
__________
At school, Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most
adults hide at least one dark secret and this makes it very
easy to blackmail them merely by saying, "I know the whole truth."
So Little Johnny decides to try it out. When he arrives home
from school that day, he says to his mother, "I know the
whole truth."His mother looks shocked, quickly finds $20,
and gives it to him, saying, "Just don't tell your father."
Quite pleased, Little Johnny waits for his father to get
home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth."
His father looks shocked, quickly finds $40, and gives it
to him, saying, "Just don't tell your mother."
The next morning, Little Johnny is on his way to school when
he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy decides to try
again. "I know the whole truth."
The mailman drops his mailbag, throws opens his arms, and says,
"Then come give your real daddy a nice big hug!"
____________
I went to the doctor's the other day and found out my new
doctor is a young female, drop-dead gorgeous!
I was embarrassed but she said, "Don't worry, I'm a professional,
I've seen it all before. Just tell me what's wrong and I'll
help you in any way I can."
I said, "I think my cock tastes funny..."
___________
An elderly Italian man who lived on the outskirts of Rimini,
Italy,went to the local church for confession.
When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the
man said: Bless Me, Father for I have sinned. ... During
World War II, a beautiful Jewish woman from our neighbourhood
knocked urgently on my door and asked me to hide her from the
Nazis. So I hid her in my attic."
The priest replied: "That was a wonderful thing you did, and
you have no need to confess that."
"There is more to tell, Father... She started to repay me with
sexual favours. This happened several times a week, and sometimes
twice on Sundays." The priest said, "That was a long time ago and
by doing what you did, you placed the two of you in great danger.
But two people under those circumstances can easily succumb to
the weakness of the flesh. However, if you are truly sorry
for your actions, you are indeed forgiven."
"Thank you, Father. That's a great load off my mind.
I do have one more question."
"And what is that?" asked the priest.
"Should I tell her the war is over?''
BUFFALO BILL
Only Want Sex
http://www.buffaloschips.com/lmnghh.htm
Pool
http://www.buffaloschips.com/xdsddzsrd.htm
Sensitivity Training
http://www.buffaloschips.com/mnhvf.htm
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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