THE POSTMAN'S CORNER The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow.  Share your unique opinion and get paid for it! Product Developers are willing to pay reviewers between $5 and $75 per completed survey. - Review Products - Take simple online surveys - Keep the products you review - Get paid for your opinion! JOIN NOW Free Membership http://www.thepostm  Congratulations! You've been selected to receive the new Samsung Gravity(TM) for FREE! Impress your friends with the new LG Renoir(TM)! This $350 value is yours FREE! Get the latest in mobile technology today! The LG Renoir(TM) is the ONLY touchscreen phone equipped with an 8 MP digital camera! Take the coolest pictures and impress you're friends with the new LG Renoir(TM), a $350 value... yours FREE! Act now to get your FREE LG Renoir(TM) today! http://www.thepostm  Take advantage of this unique offer and indulge yourself with a $500 Petsmart Gift Card! http://www.thepostm  Hear what you've been missing! The Bell + Howell Silver Sonic XL has the ability to give you sonic hearing, easily amplifying sounds up to 60 feet away. Never miss out on a conversation, game or TV show ever again! Small and lightweight, it looks like a wireless cell phone earpiece so no one will know you have sonic hearing! Silver Sonic XLÕs flexible ear mount easily adjusts to fit all ear shapes and sizes. Plus, the convenient volume control lets you easily control the intensity and volume of your Silver Sonic XL so you can set the level right where you want it. Silver Sonic XL is portable, SONIC HEARING! * Small and lightweight * Discreet and looks like cell phone ear adapter * Adjustable volume control * Flexible and comfortable and fits left and right ear * 3 soft tips helps insure comfortable fit * Amplifies sounds up to 60 feet away! http://www.thepostm GOOD AFTERNOON POSTMAN FANS! Ok, these are the facts my friend... The Global Facts ... At Any Given Moment: Fact: 79,000,000 people are engaged in intercourse right now. Fact: 58,000,000 are kissing. Fact: 37,000,000 are relaxing after having sex ... Fact: 1 lonely bugger is reading emails... - You hang in there sunshine! We do hope you enjoy today's issue! Cordially Martin aka the postman THE COMICS the doctor says http://www.thepostm we're losing him http://www.thepostm a new antidepressant http://www.thepostm the Lockhorns http://www.thepostm Maxine says http://www.thepostm which one is the patient? http://www.thepostm nice doggie http://www.thepostm ____________  LETS GO TO THE MOVIES the Lord's supper http://www.thepostm the blow dryer prank http://www.thepostm great golf swings http://www.thepostm Hello-wav fil http://www.thepostm I lost my panties http://www.thepostm menopausal woman http://www.thepostm friendship buoquet http://www.thepostm ____________ INTERESTING STUFF condoms http://www.thepostm animal videos http://www.thepostm 20 things you didn't know about fat http://www.thepostm extreme base jumping http://www.thepostm don't worry be happy http://www.thepostm trucking duck http://www.thepostm For those who like Hot Mexican food http://www.thepostm Q. Do you know why no woman will ever be truly satisfied? A. Because no man will ever have a Chocolate Penis that ejaculates Money! ____________ Three old guys from the twilight home were given, as a treat, a day at the beach. And it turned out to be a nudist beach. They were watching the various young women agog. When the prettiest of them all walked by, one of the men said, "I'd like to give her a hug." "I'd like to give her a kiss," said the second man. And the third old man said, "What was that other thing we used to do?" ____________ A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, non-stop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and therefore we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax....... ... OH MY GOD!" Deadly silence..... ...... Then, the captain came back on the intercom and said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier, but while I was talking, the flight attendant brought me a cup of coffee and spilled the hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!" A passenger in Coach said, "That's nothing. He should see the back of mine!" ____________ A pirate walks into a bar wearing a paper towel on his head. He sits down at the bar and orders some dirty rum. The bar- tender asks, "Why are you wearing a paper towel?" "Arrr..." says the pirate. "I've got a bounty on me head!" ___________ A Hard Blow to His Case http://www.funpagee Swimming in Tech Heck http://www.funpagee A Horse Gets Shoed http://www.funpagee Florida Can Win Ben Stein's Respect http://www.funpagee New Gun Law Richochets Through Philly http://www.funpagee They Don't Have a Prayer http://www.funpagee Still Not Parent of the Year http://www.funpagee The Best Defense http://www.funpagee Suzie meets up with Sandi as she's picking up her car from the mechanic. Suzie asks, "Everything ok with your car now?" "Yes, thank goodness" Sandi replies. "Weren't you worried the mechanic might try to rip you off?" "Yeah I was, but he didn't. I was SO relieved when he told me all I needed was blinker fluid." ____________ Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents the week before Christmas. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers when the youngest one began praying at the top of his lungs. "I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE..." "I PRAY FOR A NEW NINTENDO..." "I PRAY FOR A NEW VCR..." His older brother leaned over and nudged the younger brother and said, "Why are you shouting your prayers? God isn't deaf." To which the little brother replied, "No, but Grandma is!" ____________ Out bicycling one day with my eight-year-old granddaughter, Carolyn, I got a little wistful. 'In ten years,' Isaid, 'you'll want to be with your friends and you won't go walking,biking, and swimming with me like you do now.' Carolyn shrugged. 'Inten years you'll be too old to do all those things anyway.' FUN PAGES from Lorraine A Bewildering Bill http://tinyurl. The Price is Far from Right http://tinyurl. BUFFALO Bill Dermatologist PAPA Thorn Good concentration http://able2laff. Holy Revelation http://able2laugh. THAT'S ALL FOLKS Have a nice day FROM: Martin aka the postman |
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