[PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner

 
 
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
 

 
There is no greater sorrow than to
be mindful of the happy time In misery
Alighieri Dante
Inferno (V, 121),



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INTERESTING STUFF
 
 
 
 

POWER POINT DISPLAYS
 
 
 
 
It is a known fact that all daughters-in- law have problems with their
mother-in-law. Anyway... One day the daughters-in- law all got together
and decided to apologise to their mothers-in-law for everything they
had supposedly done wrong. A week later the daughters-in- law decided
to take their families (including their mothers-in-law) on a picnic.
The mothers-in-law were all in one bus, which was the first to leave.
On the way their bus had an accident and all the mothers-in-law died.
The daughters-in- law were devastated but one in particular was more
heart broken than the rest.  Everyone tried to console her by telling her
that at least her mother-in-law had died without any tension between
them. But still she cried. Eventually when she was calm enough to speak
the other women asked her: "Why are you crying so much? Was your
mother-in-law that special?" The woman no sobbing uncontrollably replied... "No,  she missed the bus!"
___________
 
Ninety-year- old man: "Yes! After all these years, I've
finally kicked the habit. I'm a free man. From now on,
no more sex. I'm going to be celibate for the rest of my life!"
Friend: "Wow! What happened? Are you concerned about
your declining health?"
Ninety-year- old: "No, I'm concerned about my declining
wealth. That darn Viagra was so expensive, I couldn't
afford cigarettes."
___________
 
When my printer's type began to grow faint, I called a localrepair shop where
a friendly man informed me that the printerprobably needed only to be cleaned.
Because the store charged$50 for such cleanings, he told me, I might be better
offreading the printer's manual and trying the job myself. Pleasantly surprised
by his candor, I asked, "Does your bossknow that you discourage business?"
"Actually it's my boss's idea," the employee replied sheepishly."We usually
make more money on repairs if we let people try tofix things themselves first."
______________
 
 
 
 
 
Bambi the blonde celebrated her 40th birthday with a makeover.
She went to the best plastic surgeon in town and got a boob lift, a tummy
tuck, butt implants, botox, collagen ...the works.  Ten weeks and thousands
of dollars later, she was a new woman -- literally. Her personal physician
then performed her annual physical, noted the new "body work."
When the exam was finished, he called her in.
"Bambi, your overall health is good, but I want to discuss a problem that
often affects women your age, osteoporosis."
Bambi looked puzzled. "Osteo--what?"
"Bone loss. Many women start to experience it in their 40s."
Bambi giggled, blushed and said, "Oh, really, Doc. You've seen me naked.
Trust me, with this body and this face, I get new bones quite often!"
________
 
The Tonight Show with Jay Leno

President Bush hosted his final White House Hanukkah party.
Hanukkah celebrates the miracle of when only a tiny amount of oil burned for eight days
— ExxonMobil's worst nightmare.
 
President Bush announced that before he leaves office he wants to
visit the poorest regions of the world. Any place where people can't
 afford to buy shoes.
 
That Iraqi journalist who threw the shoes at Bush says he planned the attack for
months. Months? Yet he still missed both times?
 
Barack Obama has named another Cabinet member: former Gov. Tom Vilsack as his Agriculture secretary. Vilsack. That sounds like a condition you should see your neurologist about. 

PAPA Thorn

Other Woman's Mucus
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