[PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner

 
 
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER

People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
 
 
 
 
 
 

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Win a $500 Gas Card & a chance for a 2008 Escape Hybrid!
Don't just sit there. You've got to Play 2 Win!
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/ce/8179.html
 
 
 
 
 
 

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Economic crisis.
Change is coming.
Millions in free grants may be lost.
Unfortunately the laws granting free money to help Americans
could be lost!
On top of one-time grants being offered right now,
you may even be able to qualify to receive this money over and
over again.These grants are in place specifically for people who
need assistance paying for bills,buying a home, starting their own
business, going to school, or even helping
raise their children.
Get a check in as little as 12 DAYS!
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/ce/8032.html
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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Receive a free Nikon Coolpix
digital camera!
3.5 inch touch screen
10 megapixel ccd
19 scene modes
optical image stabilization!
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GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!
 
 
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
 
THE COMICS
 
 
Before marriage, after marriage
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/j123.html
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 
 
 
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Murphy Brown, what are you doing New Years eve?
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies4546.html
 
=================
POWER POINT DISPLAYS
 
 
 
=============
 
INTERESTING STUFF
 
 
best and worse sci fi movies of 2008
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/jsw/psp1661.html
 
 

From a passenger ship, one can just barely see a bearded man on a small island
in the distance who is shouting and desperately waving his hands.
"Who is that?" a passenger asked a passing steward.
"I have no idea. Every year when we pass by, he goes nuts."
_____________
 
Arriving home from work at my usual hour of 5 p.m., I discovered that it had not
been one of my wife's better days. Nothing I said or did seemed to be right.
By 7 p.m., things had not changed, so I suggested I go outside, pretend I had
just gotten home and start all over again. My wife agreed.
I went outside, came back in and with a big smile, announced, "Honey, I'm home!" "And just where have you been?" she replied sharply.
"It's after seven o'clock!"
_______________
 
A Mother passing by her son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was
nicely made and everything was picked up.
Then she saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was
addressed to 'Mom'. With the worst premonition she opened the envelope with
trembling hands and read the letter.
Dear Mum,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with
my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Dad and you. I have
been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you
would not approve of her because of all her piercings, tattoos, tight
motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it's
not only the passion......
Mom she's pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and
has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having
many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt
anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other
people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we will
pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She
deserves it. Don't worry Mom. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.
Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know
your grandchildren.
Love,
Your Son, Paul
P.S. Mom, none of the above is true. I'm over at Dustin's house. I just
wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the report
card that's in my center desk drawer.
I love you - call me when it's safe to come home!
___________
 
A stunning blonde had gone to her student advisor for some course
problems, but seemed to be paying only half attention to his replies.
"Are you feeling OK?" he asked.
"Well, to be honest, I have this compulsion to have sex with every
man I meet," she admitted. "Is there a name for my condition?" "Why
yes, there is," he said, as he picked her up and began carrying her
to the couch.
"It's called 'Good News'."
________________
 
An American visiting in England asked at the hotel for the elevator.
The porter looked a bit confused, but smiled when he realized what
the man wanted. "You must mean the lift."
"No, if I ask for the elevator, I mean the elevator."
"Well, over here, we call them lifts."
"Now, you listen here. Someone in America invented the elevator."
"Oh, right you are, sir. But someone here in England invented the language
__________
 
Judge:    "You say you're petitioning for a legal name change?"
Leon: "    Yes, your honor."
Judge:     (looking at petition) "I can see why, your name is Leon
Poopferbrains, is it?"
Leon:        "Yes, your honor."
Judge: "    And what do you want to change your name to, Mr.
poopferbrains?"
Leon: "    Melvin, your honor."
___________
 
FUN PAGES from Lorraine
 
Insert Drive-Thru Joke Here
http://tinyurl.com/9mfnde
 
No Child Left Behind Pushes Forward
http://tinyurl.com/74vcse
 
BMW Drift
http://tinyurl.com/7s3y7z
____________
 
BUFFALO Bill
 
How About a Little Sex Tonight
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/3333.htm
 
 
 
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman

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