Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
The story of the wireless router continues. The last I told you
I was happily networked with a Belkin G Mimo router or so I
thought. Buffy complained that she was freezing up while she
was chatting online. I blamed it on Buffy's chat room and ignored
her until I decided to play pool on New Year's Day and Yahoo
Games locked up on me and then later when I couldn't play You
Tube videos all of the way through. I thought I had found a work
around involving Windows Firewall but that proved to be only
temporary so after finding out on Google that it was a common
problem I boxed it up and sent Buffy to Wal-mart with it. She
called and said they had a Linksys and a Motorola so I told her
to get the Linksys which I wanted in the first place but they had
been out of stock.
Buffy got home and I looked at the box and she had a Linksys router
but it wasn't wireless so it will be going back today and I guess I
will
give the wireless Motorola a try. If that doesn't work I will buy a
Linksys
online or order a modem router through SBC. I will not be denied my
wireless network now that I finally decided to have one.
Enjoy the chips..... buffalo
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Nipple Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
This newlywed couple, just married three months, is happily married.
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One night he is sleeping alone, since his wife is away on a buisness
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Soon after he finds out that his wife has cancer, and only a month
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put her in the ground.
He keeps it in his pajama shirt pocket and rubs it every night and
is
able to sleep again.
A couple of days later he dumps all of his clothes off at the
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inside his pajama pocket. Stuck in an all day meeting which he can't
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laundromat and asks the guy, "Did you perhaps find anything in the
pocket of my pajamas?"
He says, "why yes, I found a raisin and I gave it to my dog as a
treat!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
Dermatologist
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<a href=" http://www.buffalos
Cookies
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<a href=" http://www.buffalos
Bitching And Moaning
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<a href=" http://www.buffalos
Misleading ad
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Tampix
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Alien Men's Room
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hole Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man is walking down the street, when he sees a machine with two
holes and with a sign overhead that reads: 'Blow Job'. The machine
has two slots, one for one dollar and one for a quarter.
He looks in his pockets and finds a dollar and a quarter. He throws
the dollar in the machine and sticks his penis into the first hole.
And, surprisingly, it feels good... it feels very good... And just
when he's about to come, the machine stops.
So he puts his dick in the other hole and puts the quarter in. And
it
hurts, it hurts. At first he is not even able to take his dick out,
but when he does, it's raw and covered with blood. He's crying
because of the pain.
An old lady comes from behind the machine and stops to ask what's
the
matter. He tells her about the first hole and how *wonderful* it
felt. Then he describes the hell of the second hole, and shows her
his red and torn penis.
And the little old biddy smiles sweetly and says,
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you?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hell Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mac died at the controls of his plane and went
to pilots' hell, where he found a hideous devil
and three doors.
The devil was busy escorting other pilots to
various "hell rooms."
"I'll be right back--don't go away," said the
devil, and he vanished.
Sneaking over to the first door, Mac peeked in
and saw a cockpit where the pilot was condemned
to forever run through pre-flight checks.
He slammed that door and peeked into the second.
There, alarms rang and red lights flashed while
a pilot had to avoid one emergency after another.
Unable to imagine a worse fate, Mac cautiously
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He was amazed to see many beautiful, scantily
clad flight attendants answering to a captain's
every whim. He quickly returned to his place
seconds before the devil reappeared.
"Okay, Mac," said the devil, "Which door will
it be, number 1 or number 2?"
"Um, I want door number 3," answered Mac.
"Sorry," said the devil. "You can't have door
number 3. That's flight attendants' hell."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Random Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A cook got his hand caught in a dishwasher - and they were both
fired.
"It's after midnight," she said. "You'd better get started." "All
right," he agreed. "Turn off the light."
Many are those who sow their wild oats Saturday night, then on
Sunday
morning go to pray for crop failure.
Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse were in divorce court and the judge
said
to Mickey, "You say here that your wife is crazy." Mickey replied,
"I
didn't say she was crazy, I said she's fucking Goofy."
"Doctor, that rectal exam hurt like hell. What did you do?" asked
John. "I used two fingers." Said the doctor. "What for?" asked John.
"I needed a second opinion."
Two women were having coffee, when one said, "I used to call my ex
'Superman' when we were in bed." The second commented, "How
flattering!" to which the first replied, "Not really! I meant that
he
was faster than a speeding bullet."
Did you hear about he new athletic shoe for lesbians? They are
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Stan Kegel
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Drug store Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man was new in town and caught the flu, so he went to see a
doctor. The doctor gave him three prescriptions. Before the man left
the doctor's office, he asked for directions to the nearest
pharmacy. The doctor said, "Go six blocks down and you will see a
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directions and had no trouble finding the pharmacy. As he got out of
his car, he noticed a gigantic sign which
read:
"The Giant Pharmacy
where you get more for your money."
He walked in and gave the pharmacist the three prescriptions. When
his name was called, he noticed that the clerk placed a gigantic
container of antibiotics on the counter, then had trouble picking up
a huge bottle of cough syrup. The man became alarmed, and before the
clerk walked away to bring the third prescription, he yelled "Excuse
me sir..the suppositories -- I don't want them!!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dog Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my dogs and was
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Duh!
I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her no, I was
starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't
because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50
pounds before I awakened in an intensive care unit with tubes coming
out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.
Her eyes about bugged out of her head. I went on and on with the
bogus diet story and she was totally buying it! I told her that it
was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works is to load
your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two
every time you feel hungry. The package said the food is
nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by
now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.
Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me
and was that why I ended up in the hospital. I said no.....I'd been
sitting in the street licking my butt when a car hit me.
I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out the door.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Love Is The Answer
http://silverandgol
BROTHER BOB'S Poems Of The Week URL:
http://ministry-
carolyn w/ There's Always Me~Elvis
http://carolynsprec
Value Of Life
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CIA - The World Factbook
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Disney Character Bushes
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Leona's Big Book of Holidays
http://community-
PSP6 Tips and Tricks
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Wireless Router Guide
http://www.firewall
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Animal World
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Kitty Korner
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Movie Chips
Lazy River Pee Prank
http://www.buffalos
Leno Needs Body Guard
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Let the Beast Go
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Levis
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Glock with Drum Mag
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Goal
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Good Ole Boys
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Good Job
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Food Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I had stopped to help a lady who had a wreck right in front of me as
she
fell asleep at the wheel with two small children in the car. She
veered off
the road sharply and hit a rock wall.
I pulled over and called for the police on my cellphone.
After the
State Trooper finished filing the report and the women's husband had
come to
pick her and the children up, the friendly, overweight officer
walked with
me back to my car. As I got in, he glanced at my dash and back at
me and
gestured to my radar detector, which is greatly frowned upon in the
great
state of Alabama. He said, "What's that?"
Thinking very quickly and not missing a beat, I looked him
straight
in the eye and replied..."Why Jerry, I'm surprised, I would have
thought in
your line of business you would have know what a radar detector
looked
like."
He shook his head and said "You know the only reason people
have
those things is to break the law!"
I blinked and looked up at him so innocently and I replied,
"Break
the law? What are you talking about? This radar detector has saved
my
life! When I get real hungry I drive around, when the radar
detector goes
off, it means I've found a grocery store. It keeps me from going
hungry."
I've never seen such a belly laugh in my whole life, but it
made his
day and I got a gold star, he said, "for originality!
buffalo says When I had a radar detector in my car it would go off
on
Easterday up by the water tower as it picked up the door opener
radar on the
Super Valu store at the bottom of the hill.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Loud 'N Clear, the compact personal sound amplifier, allows you
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The Loud 'N Clear listening device is cleverly designed
to look like an expensive cell phone ear piece.
Additional Ordering Details:
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
the Lockhorns
http://www.thepostm
the new sherrif
http://www.thepostm
having sex
http://www.thepostm
Good For you
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<a href=" http://www.buffalos
No Underwear
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<a href=" http://www.buffalos
Escort
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<a href=" http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
There was a young man from Wales
Who lived on snot, shit and snails.
When he couldn't get these,
He lived off the cheese
That he scraped from his dick with his nails.
There was a young man from Duluth
Whose dick was shot off in his youth.
So he fucked with his nose,
And his fingers and toes,
And came through a hole in his tooth.
Said the trader, "I'm not pleased one bit,
In our dealings, that you should submit
Your signed IOU
In lieu of a ewe
I just won't accept that sheep chit!"
Ross
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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*Garnishing Book with tips and tricks on preparing fruits and
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A homosexual went into a bar and met a big, burly man and they soon
left together. The next day the homosexual came back in the bar, all
battered and bruised, with two broken legs and his head bandaged.
The
bartender asked, "What the hell happened to you?" "Well," the
homosexual replied, "that man I left with yesterday wined me and
dined me, then took me up to his apartment and gave me a bath,
powdered me down and put me in a beautiful negligee. Then he picked
me up in his arms, carried me over to the window by the moonlight
and
asked me, 'Are you my little nightingale?
replied, 'Well, fly, my little nightingale, fly!' and threw me out
the window!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sands Of Christ
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
When Joe, a nice man married for over 50 years
died, his wife, Myrtle was devastated. A couple
of months later, Myrtle also died. Once in
heaven, Myrtle anxiously looked for Joe.
Suddenly, behind a cloud, she could clearly see
him with another woman.
She ran towards him, calling his name: "Joe. Darling ...Joe"
Joe said: "Hold your horses woman, and don't
'darling' me. The deal was very clear"..."Until
death do us part".
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1497
Recession, Manic Depression
Rudy: So tell me Sandi, I thought bi-peds were smart enough to
figure
these financial things out.
Sandi: Here is a scheme that bi-peds fell for. It is crazy.
Rudy: Tell me.
Sandi: Okay, a bi-ped will sell 3 units to someone for x amount of
money,
that next guy will make a lot of money if he sells 3 units(people)
for x
amount of money, and on and on it goes. The guy at the top makes a
lot
of money but it is building like a pyramid. It is a ponzi deal and
people
recently lost billions of dollars.
Rudy: Seems like if people see a deal that is too good to be true
then
common sense would tell them that it is too good to be true.
Sandi: Alas, bi-peds are not known for their common sense. How
else
can you explain it?
Rudy: Sometimes I am happy to be a dog.
Sandi: I have not met a dog that will rip off another dog, but I
cannot
say the same for humans.
The herd in Guthrie
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
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