THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
Happiness comes through doors you
didn't even know you left open.
The Kangaroo Keeper
Instantly organize any bag with the Kangaroo Keeper.
Coming in different sizes and colors, coordinate it
with any style. Be able to access up to 70 items in
seconds with various compartments. Never call your
bag a bottomless pit again. Get organized with the Kangaroo Keeper.
Purchase one Kangaroo Keeper and receive another
http://tinyurl.com/y99clsg
______________
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Martin aka the postman rode his motorcycle over to Buffalo Bill's
house to play cribbage the other night. The girls were having
a tupper ware party at postman's house and Sandy had gone over
to spend the evening with "the war department".
"The war department" called me and asked me to pick
up some tylenol, because she had a headache. so,
Buffalo Bill and the postman decided to go to Walmart.
Bill says, "we'll take the Suburban." So the postman climbs up
into the passenger seat, and before taking off, the Buffalo
opened the hood to check the oil.
"Can we make a quick stop?" asks the buffalo.
"Sure," says the postman, "where do you need to go?"
"I need to stop by the auto parts store to get a longer dipstick."
"Why do you need a longer one?"
Says Bill, "The one I got ain't long enough to reach the oil."
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
______________
THE COMICS
at the bar
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u050.html
virus
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u051.html
I love being married
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u052.html
stupidity
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u053.html
my mind
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u054.html
the difference
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u055.html
from now on
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u056.html
no wonder
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u057.html
what you would like
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u058.html
____________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
slips
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8071.html
puppy and the pumpkin
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8072.html
horny frenchman
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8074.html
divorce court
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8075.html
make the old one work
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8076.html
another Japanese game show
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8077.html
Bridgestone
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8078.html
The pilot was sitting in his seat and pulled out a .38 revolver.
He placed it on top of the instrument panel, then asked
the navigator, "Do you know what I use this for?"
The navigator replied timidly, "No, what's it for?"
The pilot responded, "I use this on navigators who get me lost!"
The navigator proceeded to pull out a
.45 and placed it on his chart table.
The pilot asked, "What's that for?"
"To be honest sir," the navigator replied,
"I'll know we're lost before you will."
________________
A salesman goes up to a house and knocks on the front door.
It's opened by a little ten year-old boy who has a lighted cigar
in one hand, a glass of whiskey in the other and a Penthouse
magazine tucked under his arm.
Salesman: "Hello son. Is your mom or dad home?"
Little boy: "What the f.....k do you think?"
_________________
Steve was in a terrible accident at work. He fell through
a floor tile and ripped off both of his ears. Since he
was permanently disfigured, he settled with the company
for a rather large sum of money and went on his way.
One day, Steve decided to invest his money in a small,
but growing telecom business. And, after weeks of
negotiations, he bought the company outright. But
after signing on the dotted line, he realized that he
knew nothing about running such a business and quickly
set out to hire someone who could do that for him.
The next day he had set up three interviews. The first
guy was great. He knew everything he needed to and was
very interesting. But at the end of the interview,
Steve asked him, "Do you notice anything different
about me?" And the gentleman answered, "Why yes, I
couldn't help but notice you have no ears."
Steve got very angry and threw him out.
The second interview was with a woman, and she was even
better than the first guy. But he asked her the same
question, Do you notice anything different about me?
And she replied: "Well, you have no ears." Steve again
was upset and tossed her out.
The third and last interview was the best of all three.
It was with a very young man who was fresh out of college.
He was smart. He was handsome. And he seemed to be a better
businessman than the first two put together. Steve was
anxious, but went ahead and asked the young man the same
question: "Do you notice anything different about me?"
And to his surprise, the young man answered: Yes.
You wear contact lenses."
Steve was shocked, and said, "What an incredibly observant
young man. How in the world did you know that?" The young
man fell off his chair laughing hysterically and replied,
"Well, it's pretty hard to wear glasses with no fuckin' ears!"
________________
The madam opened the brothel door in Winnipeg and saw a
rather dignified, well-dressed, good-looking man in
his late forties or early fifties.
'May I help you sir?' she asked. 'I want to see
Valerie,' the man replied.'Sir, Valerie is one of
our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer
someone else', said the madam..
'No, I must see Valerie,' he replied.
Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to
the man she charged $5000 a visit..Without hesitation,
the man pulled out five thousand dollars and gave
it to Valerie, and they went upstairs.
After an hour, the man calmly left.
The next night, the man appeared again,
once more demanding to see Valerie.
Valerie explained that no one had ever come back
two nights in a row as she was too expensive.
But there were no discounts. The price was still $5000.
Again, the man pulled out the money, gave it to
Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left.
The following night the man was there yet again.
Everyone was astounded that he had come for a
third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went upstairs.
After their session, Valerie said to the man,
'No one has ever been with me three nights
in a row. Where are you from?'
The man replied, ' Ontario .'
'Really', she said. 'I have family in Ontario .'
'I know.' the man said. 'Your sister died,
and I'm her attorney. She asked me to give
you your $15,000 inheritance.'
The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain.
1. Death
2. Taxes
3. Being screwed by a lawyer
______________
When he received a journal as a birthday gift,
a twelve-year- old boy was mystified.
"Mom," he asked, "What am I supposed to
do with this? The pages are blank."
"You write down interesting stuff that
happens to you," she said. "Oh," he said, a
look of enlightenment crossing his face, "It's like a blog on paper!"
___________
Bob's sister was one of the most popular girls in
Manhattan. She had more boyfriends then she knew what to
do with and she never wanted for a thing. Bob was always
in debt and constantly asking his sister for spending
money. "I don't understand you, Bob," she said in
obvious annoyance one afternoon when he tried to put the
bite on her for a 10 spot. "I don't have any trouble
saving money, so why should you?"
"Sure, sure," he said, "But you've got money coming in
all the time from the very thing that's keeping me broke."
_________________
BUFFALO BILL
3rd World Bomb Squad
http://www.buffaloschips.com/61627.htm
ICTV
http://www.buffaloschips.com/6241.htm
Leno Photo Booth
http://www.buffaloschips.com/6242.htm
Texas Shootout
http://www.buffaloschips.com/6243.htm
________________
SYDESJOKES LIST
Can Recycling
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000283.html
Canadian Beer Commercial
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000284.html
Canadian Idol
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000285.html
_____________
FUN PAGES FROM LORRAINE
Carnival Star
http://tinyurl.com/mlnxto
Party Down
http://tinyurl.com/pv9z67
Armed Invasion Game
http://tinyurl.com/btoa68
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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