THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
I wished the buck stopped here, as I could use a few
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Lot of you folks been writing in asking why I have not
been doing power point displays of late. To be honest,
in case you have noticed, there is a lot I have not been
doing. For example, Interesting stuff, the fun pages,
and also kewl pics have been missing for a while now.
I could tell you that its cuz I don't have the health.
Well, thats partially true, because after a couple hours
a day at the computer, it gets difficult for me with breathing.
Truth be told, lets face it, summer calls. That means such
things as fishing poles, motorcycles and other realtime
activities which forcibly limit the amount of postman
time I have. I will do my best to bring them back now and
then. It will require a certain amount of something called
"ambition" I have been looking for it. Would you all send
me some if you find it? preciate it.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
__________
THE COMICS
you're hired
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d030.html
hold these
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d031.html
on face book
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d032.html
hallmark cards
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d033.html
our ceo says
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d034.html
Martha Stewart
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d035.html
discount doggie
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d036.html
I'm lovin it
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d037.html
ugly children
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/d038.html
___________________
Obama's changes in gun control laws will greatly
change deer hunting practices
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
National Anthem - Anthony Gargiula
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5577.html
fitness video
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5578.html
is she trying to be a helicopter?
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5579.html
shaking hands
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5581.html
you drive me crazy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5582.html
my name is...
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5583.html
_______________
I want one...
There was an engineer, manager, and a programmer driving down a steep
mountain road. The brakes failed and the car careened down the road
out of control. Half way down the driver managed to stop the car by
running it against the embankment narrowly avoiding careening off
the cliff. They all got out, shaken by their narrow escape from
death, but otherwise unharmed.
The manager said, "To fix this problem we need to organize a committee,
have meetings, and through process of exchanging ideas, develop a solution."
The engineer said, "No that would take too long, besides that method never
worked before. I have my trusty pen knife here and will take apart the
brake system, isolate the problem and correct it."
The programmer said, "I think your both wrong! I think we should all push
the car back up the hill ...and see if it happens again."
___________________
Once there was a mouse who grew tired of his humdrum life. He journeyed
into the forest to seek the counsel and miracles produced by the wise old owl.
"And what would you rather be?" asked the owl.
"A garden gnome," replied the mouse.
"Well, the first thing we'll have to do is make you quite a bit larger,
but I think I have enough yeast to do the job. Follow me into the leaven room."
Once inside, the owl went into the corner and returned with a large shovel.
"Wow," said the mouse with a touch of awe and fear in his squeaky little voice.
"How much yeast are you going to use?"
"Well," replied the owl, "you know what they say. It takes a lot of
leaven to make a mouse a gnome."
____________
TERRIFYING THINGS TO HEAR
The dentist says, "This will not hurt a bit."
The IRS announces, "We are simplifying the tax forms."
Your lawyer says, "This is an air-tight case -- you cannot lose."
Your stockbroker says, "This little drop in the market is just a minor correction."
Your physician says, "You are in great shape -- you will live to be 100!"
Your business partner says, "Nothing can possibly go wrong."
Your best friend says, "Trust me -- I will never tell a soul."
The directions on a do-it-yourself kit say, "Even a child can do it."
______________
Mary: It was supposed to be nothing more than a good night kiss,
but He instantly tried to run his hand up under my skirt.
Jill: How forward!
Mary: Exactly! That's why I stopped him, and he said, "Oh, Honey!
Am I the first one ever to do this to you?"
Jill: Oh, please!
Mary: I know! So I said, "I don't know; you haven't done anything yet,
and at this rate you'll never get the chance either!"
______________
A man goes to a doctor:
"Doctor, I have a sexual performance problem. Can you help me?"
"Oh, that's not a problem anymore!" announces the proud
physician. "They just came out with this new wonder drug, Viagra,
that does the trick! You take some pills and your problems are
history."
So, the doctor gives the man a prescription and sends him on his
merry way. A couple of months later, the doctor runs into his
patient on the street.
"Doctor, Doctor!" exclaims the man excitedly, "I've got to thank
you! This drug is a miracle! It's wonderful!"
"Well, I'm glad to hear that," says the pleased physician. "What
does your wife think about it?"
"Wife?" asks the man, "...I haven't been home yet."
______________
Nadine: Were your parents upset when you got a divorce?
Jill: Well, you know how parents are. My mother said, "SO!
Is this how it's going to be? Just one man after another. for the
rest of your life?"
Nadine: Typical! What did you tell her?
Jill: I said, "Gee, I hope so!"
___________
A guy and several of his buddies used to frequent a certain
restaurant. The food was always good, but the waitress always looked
and sounded very sour. One evening, one of the friends was feeling
rather good, and jokingly asked the waitress when she came to take
their orders, "Do you believe in free sex?"
The waitress huffed up and yelled at him, "I certainly do NOT!"
"Soooo," asked they guy, "what do you charge?"
___________
An old woman was taken to a gynecologist for the very first time, and
of course the gynecologist was a very young and handsome fellow. The
doctor was very
thorough in his examination, and of course the old woman was quite
embarrassed throughout the whole examination. Finally, the exam was
over and the
doctor told her to get dressed and come in to his office to talk
about his findings.
The old woman listened intently as the doctor gave her the results.
She then said she really only had one question for him.
The doctor said, "What is the question you have?"
"Tell me young man, does your mother know how you make a living?"
FUN PAGES from Lorraine
Liong: The Lost Amulets
http://tinyurl.com/ohzqpa
The Earth is Flat
http://tinyurl.com/ct6ujt
Farm Frenzy Pizza Party
____________
Achoo
http://www.buffaloschips.com/98uyd.htm
Action
http://www.buffaloschips.com/87y09io.htm
Acute Angina
http://www.buffaloschips.com/sdfsdf.htm
___________
SYDESJOKES List
Chocolate Anus
http://www.sydesjokes.com/link2/link001629.html
Wanda For President
http://www.sydesjokes.com/link2/link001630.html
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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