THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
When your friends begin to
flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure
sign you're getting old.- Mark Twain
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=============
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS
I always enjoy my walks with Turk the dog, aka Carlos the rat.
Mostly, I let him choose the direction and speed at which we
proceed. This works out pretty good for both of us as he likes
to investigate every telephone pole, firehydrant, car tire and
etc. that he can find on the way. And I cannot do a lot of walking
due to my breathing. So we might spend a good 20 or 30 minutes
"sniffing" around and only cover one block.
Yesterday, we had been out and about
when suddenly, Turk dug his paws into the sidewalk, refusing to
go a step further. I was a little surprised because usually, altho
small, he tends to lead me, pulling and tugging on the leashe, like
a typical doggie does. This time however, something was definitely
making him take heed and stop. I looked around cautiously because
I've seen times where this could be a large dog wandering the street
not on a leashe. I've also seen times when he was scared of a cat.
And he turned tail and ran between my legs. But no, it was no stray
dog or cat. I looked up and realized: One house along the way
apparently had purchased a new lawn statue at Home Depot. It was
a bronze cow. First, he cowered and hid, afraid of it. Then he
decided to bark. After a couple of minutes, he realized that the
bark approach was not gonna cut it. Altho he had peed at least 6 or
7 times, in the last five minutes, his next reaction was a classic:)
He walked up to the statue and peed all over its hoves:)
Apparently when your means of violence
is nothing more than a loud bark, a good pee provides sufficiently:)
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_______________
THE COMICS
getting revenge
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a041.html
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a042.html
inadequacy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a043.html
intelligence
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a044.html
thankgoodness
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a045.html
the burglar
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a046.html
Grandma
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a047.html
practice
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a048.html
signs
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/a050.html
____________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIE
breathalyzer test
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5444.html
sexy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5445.html
wardrobe malfunction
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5446.html
eggs
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5447.html
why no one is afraid of the French army
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5448.html
how to get a divorce
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5449.html
kegos
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5450.html
______________
While driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up
to an Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage
obviously had a sense of humor, because attached
to the back of the carriage was a hand printed
sign...
Energy efficient vehicle:
Runs on oats and grass.
Caution:
Do not step in exhaust!
_____________
Hard to believe, but many of our customers at the
bank still don't know how to swipe their card
through the ATM card reader. Because of this, my
fellow tellers and I often find ourselves having
to explain how it's done. One teller complained
that she kept getting odd looks every time she
explained it. I found out why when I overheard
her tell one man, "Strip down facing me."
_______________
Q. What do most men consider a gourmet restaurant?
A. Any place without a drive-up window.
Q. What do you call a smiling Roman with pubic hair between his teeth?
A. Gladiator! (Glad he ate her)
Q. What do you get when you cross a vibrator with an anteater?
A: An armadildo.
Q. What do you call a handcuffed man?
A. Trustworthy.
_____________
A man walks into a bar in Fort Kent, Maine -- a
tiny hamlet hard on the border with Canada -- and
he says to the bartender, "Pardon me, but this
has to be the absolute dullest place I have ever
been in my entire life. Just what the hell do you
people do to amuse yourselves around here?"
The bartender looks up slowly and says, "We hunt and we screw."
The man says, "What do you hunt?"
The bartender says, "Something to screw."
__________
A young couple came into the church office to
fill out a pre-marriage questionnaire form. The
young man, who had never talked to a pastor
before, was quite nervous and the pastor tried to
put him at ease.
When they came to the question, "Are you entering
this marriage of your own free will?" there was a
long pause.
Finally, the girl looked over at the apprehensive
young man and said, "Put down yes."
___________
BUFFALO Bill
Kangaroo
http://www.buffaloschips.com/90208.htm
Peyton
http://www.buffaloschips.com/90402.htm
Parking 2
http://www.buffaloschips.com/asddsas.htm
_________
SYDES JOKES LIST
She Won A Toyota
http://www.sydesjokes.com/link2/link001586.html
New Hovis Ad Depicting The Last 122 Years
http://www.sydesjokes.com/link2/link001587.html
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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