THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
"A great civilization is not conquered from without
until it has destroyed itself within."
- Will Durant
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GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Three reasons I'll never give up my guns
Gott'a get back to the firing range...
my turn to pick up the brass behind the shooting stations!!
Guns have only two enemies;
Rust and Liberal Politicians.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
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THE COMICS
lawsuit
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u030.html
second honeymoon
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u031.html
he's cute
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u032.html
good lover
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u033.html
wife caught him
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u034.html
sex ed
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u035.html
careful mister
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u036.html
worst case
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u037.html
a fair trade
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u038.html
the fart locker
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u039.html
____________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
"You Picked a Fine Time to Lead Us, Barack"
by Jonathan McWhite
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9400.html
inspired bicycles
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9401.html
the most beautiful house in the world
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9402.html
Will It Blend? - iPad
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9403.html
Mr. Bean goes to the swimming pool
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9404.html
"Funny Accident" Prank! Fake Damage Note
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9405.html
"Funny Pranks" Car Crash Prank
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9406.html
A virile, young Italian soldier was relaxing at his
favorite bar in Rome, when he managed to attract a
spectacular young blonde. Things progressed to the
point where he invited her back to his apartment;
and after some small talk, they made love. After a
pleasant interlude, he asked with a smile,
"So...you finish?"
She paused for a second, frowned, and replied "No."
Surprised, the young man reached for her; and the love
making resumed. This time, she thrashes about wildly;
and there are screams of passion. The love making ends;
and again, the young man smiles, and asks,
"You finish?"
And again, after a short pause, she returns his smile,
cuddles closer to him, and softly says, "No."
Stunned, but damned if this woman is going to outlast him,
the young man reaches for the woman. Using the last of
his strength, he barely manages it; but they climax
simultaneously, screaming, bucking, clawing and ripping
bed sheets. The exhausted man falls onto his back,
gasping. Barely able to turn his head, he looks into
her eyes, smiles proudly, and asks,
"You finish?"
"No!" she shouts back, "I Sveedish!"
_______________
There was a man who was stranded on an islan in the
Pacific Ocean. One day a ship was passing, noticed
his signals, and decided to go see if he could be
rescued. A small landing party took off in a little
motorboat, and when they got to the shore, one of the
crewmen got out and walked to him. "Where ye from, mate?"
"The United States."
"OH. Well, I brought ye some newspapers. Obama has
been elected president, just signed a new set of health
laws to set the US back a hundred years. Read these
papers about the US since Obama took office.
"'E's also taken over sixty percent of GM and eight
percent of Chrysler Corporation.
"In addition, passed new health laws. When we pass
by near here on our return trip, I'll stop off.
If ye *still* want rescued, we'll pick you up," replied
the man in charge of the landing party.
_______________
10 Reasons Why Sex Is Better Than School
1. Everybody likes sex and nobody likes school, except
for virgins and only because they haven't had sex yet.
2. Sex sucks, moans, licks, pumps, throbs etc...,
school just sucks.
3. After sex you feel like smoking a cigarette. After
school you feel like smoking something a whole lot stronger.
4. You get disciplined during sex only if you want to.
5. Drinking drives people to sex, whereas school
drives people to drink.
6. Sex relieves stress, school is the cause of stress.
7. Nothing beats the "hands on" experience you get with sex.
8. After sex you feel like you have accomplished something.
9. Sex is cheaper. Even if you have to pay for a hooker,
it is still cheaper than paying thousands of dollars in tuition.
10. At least you have a choice whether or not you want to
have sex. At school your teachers screw you regardless
______________
A little boy came home from playing outside one day.
He was huffing and puffing, like he was winded. All of
sudden, the boy's father heard a kitten squalling like
it was extremely uncomfortable. He turned around and
looked. Sure enough, there's his son -- holding a
kitten - obviously no more than 6 weeks old! "What have
you got there, son?" "It's especially for you, Dad,"
the boy replied. The father asked, "What do you mean?"
"Remember the other night, you told Mom you wanted
'a little pussy?'
"Well, I heard you, and I went out and got you one!"
_____________
A man went to the store with his 3 year-old daughter in
tow. Since he was just there to grab some essentials
like milk and bread, he opted to save some time by not
pushing a cart around the store."That's not the way Mommy
does it," his daughter informed him."I know, dear,
but Daddy's way is OK, too," he replied.
Leaving the store in the rain and without a cart, he
carried the bag of groceries, his daughter, and the
milk quickly to the car. Not wanting to set anything
down on the wet ground, he set the jug of milk on top
of the car, efficiently whisked open the car door with
his now free hand, scooted the groceries in and daughter
into the car seat in one swift motion, and hopped in himself.
"That's not the way Mommy does it," his daughter informed
him again."Honey, there's more than one way to do things,"
the father replied patiently. "Daddy's way is OK, too."
As they pulled out and headed down the street, he became
aware of the scraping sound on the roof as the jug of
milk slid down the length of the rooftop, bounced off
the trunk of the car and splattered to the ground,
sending a froth of white milk in every direction.
In the millisecond he took to process his mistake,
his young daughter looked at him, and in a most serious
voice said, "That's NOT the way Mommy does it."
______________
Q. Why did OJ Simpson want to move to the Appalachians?
A. Everyone has the same DNA.
Q. I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A. With any luck, right after he finishes college.
Q. What's the most active muscle in a woman? -
A. The penis.
Q. Why do women like wearing black panties?
A. It's a way for them to say, "In memory of those who were buried here"
Q. What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk?
A. A milk dud (or an udder failure)
Q. How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies?
A. You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.
FUN PAGES
Online Duck Hunting Game
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41500&s=n
Two (Too) Funny Motivationals
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=40946&s=n
Lingerie Bowl
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=20491&s=n
__________
BUFFALO BILL
Girl On Bike
http://www.buffaloschips.com/axsd.htm
Giving Change
http://www.buffaloschips.com/asdsza.htm
Glade Plug Ups
http://www.buffaloschips.com/asdasw.htm
________
SYDESJOKES LIST
Kayak And Killer Whale
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000864.html
Keep The Kids Quiet In The Car
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000865.html
Kegos
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000866.html
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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