[PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner!



 


THE POSTMAN'S CORNER


It is our responsibilities, not ourselves,
that we should take seriously.
~Peter Ustinov

___________


GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
I'm having Internet problems this weekend.
So I am going to keep the comments short.
If you don't get a copy tomorrow, you will
know why. I am lucky to be able to get this
issue out.  Life is rough without Internet:(
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
______________

THE COMICS

beauty
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u050.html

glad you liked it
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u051.html

do me a favor
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u052.html

Cinderella
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u053.html

circulate
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u054.html

just in time
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u055.html

put it back
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u056.html

in the future
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u057.html

mom??
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/u058.html
______________

LETS GO TO THE MOVIES

start to finish
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9413.html

stun gun foolishness
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9414.html

kill some time
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9415.html

e d treatment
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9416.html

table top tech
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9417.html

once upon a time
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9418.html

"Say," said the recently married player in his
usual confidential tone, "there are a lot of hot
women at this party. If I find a chick 
who's ready, would you mind if I used your extra
bedroom for a little quick in-&-out in-&-out?"
"Not at all," replied the gracious host,
"but what about your wife?" "Nothing to worry
about," said the operator. "I'll only be gone a
few minutes and she'll never miss me." 
"No, I'm sure she won't miss you," agreed the host,
"but fifteen minutes ago she borrowed the extra bedroom."
____________

A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a
Scotch with two drops of > water. As the bartender
gives her the drink she says, 'I'm on this cruise to
celebrate my 80th birthday and it's today.'
The bartender says, 'Well, since it's your birthday,
I'll buy you a drink. In fact, this one is on me.'
As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her
right says, 'I would like to buy you a drink, too.'
The old woman says, 'Thank you. Bartender, I want a
Scotch with two drops of water.' 'Coming up,' says the
bartender. As she finishes that drink, the man to her
left says, 'I would like to buy you one, too.'
The old woman says, 'Thank you. Bartender, I want
another Scotch with two drops of water.' 'Coming
right up,' the bartender says. As he gives her the
drink, he says, 'Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why
the Scotch with only two drops of water?'
The old woman replies, 'Sonny, when you're my age,
you've learned how to hold  your liquor. Holding your water,
however, is a whole other issue.'
__________

A reporter from New York was visiting an old colleague
who now edited a newspaper in a tiny Vermont town.
"I don't see how you do it," the NY reporter said.
"How can you drum up interest in the news when everybody
in town knows what everybody else is doing?"
"Sure they know," the editor said, "but they read the
paper to see who got caught at it."
_____________

After an exhaustive review of the research literature,
here's the final word on nutrition and health:
1. Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
2. Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
3. Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart
attacks than us.
4. Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer fewer
heart attacks than us.
5. Germans drink beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer
fewer heart attacks than us.
6. The French eat foie-Gras, full fat cheese and drink red wine
and suffer fewer heart attacks than us
CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is
apparently what kills you.
____________

This young couple had only been married for one night when The
blonde bride went to the doctor to say, "This is my first day of
marriage, and there is something that bothers me."
Doctor: "What is it?"
Blonde Bride: "Well, during sex I feel his tool touch my kidneys."
Doctor: "Just send in your groom, and I will cut a couple of
inches off and hopefully it will not reach your kidneys."
Blonde Bride: "No, I want you to remove my kidneys instead."
_____________

Jimmy was sent to prison for his crimes, but upon arrival at
the correctional facility, he told the warden he wasn't at
all worried about his future. He knew he wouldn't have to serve
the full term of his penalty.
"Why's that, Jimmy ?" the warden asked "Sure of your appeal,
are you?"
"No, sir." Jimmy replied.
"Already making plans to escape, then?"
"Not a one, Warden."
"Then why are you so sure you'll be out of here before
your time is up?"
"Well, Warden," says Jimmy , "it's like this. In the entire
time I've been married, my wife has yet to let me finish a sentence!"
___________

SydesJokes Video Clips

Killer Whale Escape
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000870.html

Kissing Test
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000871.html

Kite Surfer
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000872.html

THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman

 



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