THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
Don't hurry. Don't worry.
Do your best and leave the rest!
~Anonymous
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GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Not too much happening on the home front here
lately. so I'm sorry if my introductory stories
are a little disappointing of late. Hard to write
about stuff when nothin happens, you know? I am
sitting here shivering today. it is damn cold here
in beautiful West Michigan. Altho the weather man
promises lots of sunshine, today, it will be less
than perfect weather for the motorcycle ,,, more
appropriate probably for my long johns. I am resisting
the temptation to crank the furnace on. For it is
an admission that summer is gone. My son is vowing
to refuse to pay his "rent" on pay day cuz he says
heat should be included and that I am a bad landlord.
(hehehe...life sucks sometimes, don't it?)
We do hope you enjoy today's issue
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_______________
THE COMICS
hey Ruthie
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/v030.html
not a bad idea
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/v031.html
this little guy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/v032.html
wearing a tie
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/v033.html
how was I to know?
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/v034.html
Mary Poppins
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/v035.html
whistler
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/v036.html
vacation
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/v037.html
lesbians
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/v038.html
______________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
marshmellow tests
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8116.html
horsin around
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8117.html
the devil went somewhere but it wasn't Georgia
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8118.html
my vibrator
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8119.html
tripod
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8120.html
not what it seems
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies8121.html
Conservative vs Liberal
* If a conservative doesn't like guns, he doesn`t buy one.
* If a liberal doesn't like guns, he feels
that no one should have one.
* If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn`t eat meat.
* If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants to ban all
meat products for everyone.
* If a conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks
about how to defeat his enemy.
* A liberal wonders how to surrender gracefully and
still look good.
* If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
* If a liberal is homosexual, he loudly demands legislated respect.
* If a black man or Hispanic is conservative, they see
themselves as independently successful.
* Their liberal counterparts see themselves as victims
in need of government protection.
* If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks
about how to better his situation.
* A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.
* If a conservative doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels.
* Liberals demand that those they don't like be shut down.
_____________
A lady lost her handbag in the bustle of shopping at the mall.
It was found by an honest little boy and returned to her.
Looking in her purse, she commented, "Hmmm.... That's funny.
When I lost my bag there was a $20 bill in it.
Now there are twenty $1 bills."
The boy quickly replied, "That's right, lady. The last
time I found a lady's purse, she didn't have any
change for a reward."
______________
A little boy and girl were walking along a trail in
the woods. The little girl noticed that some of the
animals were behaving oddly.
"Why is that rabbit on top that other one"? She asked..
The little boy stops to consider his answer,
and replies, "they're making cigarettes".
"Cigarettes"! She says, as they continue walking along.
Pretty soon they approach a couple of raccoons. The
little girl asked, "are they making cigarettes too"?
"Yea," says the Little boy.
he little girl looks around and says "It looks like
all the animals are making cigarettes."
"Why don't we make cigarettes?" she asked.
The little boy was quick to say, "OK!" A short time
latter the little boy and the little girl were walking
out of the woods, when she asked,
"Little boy, what kinda cigarettes did we make?"
The little boy stops to think about his answer, then
replies, "Well if you get a hump in your belly it's a Camel,
and if you don't it's a Lucky Strike".
_____________
A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous.
He's not sure about what to talk about, so he asks his
father for advice. The father replies, "My son, there are
three subjects that always work. These are food,
family, and philosophy." The boy picks up his date and
they go to a soda fountain. Ice cream sodas in front of
them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the
boy's nervousness builds. Then he remembers his father's
advice, and chooses the first topic.
He asks the girl, "Do you like spinach?"
"No," she replies, and the silence returns.
After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks
of his father's suggestion and turns to the second
item on the list. He asks, "Do you have a brother?"
Again, the girl says "No" and there is silence once again.
The boy then plays his last card. He thinks of his
father's advice and asks the girl, "If you had a brother,
would he like spinach?"
_________________
A teenage girl had just been given family-car privileges. One
Friday night she returned home very late from a party.
The next morning her father went out to the driveway to get the
newspaper and came back into the house frowning.
At 11:30am the girl sleepily walked into the kitchen, and her
father asked her, "What time did you get in last night?"
"Not too late, Dad." she replied nervously.
Dead-panned, her father said, "Then I'll have to talk with the
paperboy about putting my paper under the front tire of the car."
_______________
FUN PAGES from Lorraine
Hidden Mysteries: Buckingham Palace
http://tinyurl.com/y9taghe
What Do You Wear To Bed?
http://tinyurl.com/dg5lko
Turtix Game
http://tinyurl.com/amo79g
___________
SYDESJOKES LIST
Carrier Landing
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000299.html
Carrier Landing Gone Wrong
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000300.html
Carrying Bricks
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000301.html
______________
BUFFALO BILL
Eric O Shea
http://www.buffaloschips.com/adfdr.htm
Escuta Essa
http://www.buffaloschips.com/athyuj.htm
Examendeprostata
http://www.buffaloschips.com/ajhhgjh.htm
Fairy Tale Ending
http://www.buffaloschips.com/ajuhu.htm
That's all folks!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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