Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
I read with interest the mention of scrapping out 13 old freighters.
The Arthur Anderson captioned by Bernie Cooper at the time of the
sinking of the Fitzgerald 34 years ago, Should NOT be scrapped. That
is a HERO SHIP!! Those men in that wonderful ship turned around and
went back into that horrible storm to help in any way they could.
That ship should be used for a museum ship , a memorial of some
kind.
My brother is one that is still aboard the Fitzgerald. There were
29 men as you may recall.
If you know of someplace we could call or contact to try to save
this one ship. PLMK. My brother was 3rd ASST.Oliver J. Champeau
.THANK YOU SO MUCH! I hope you continue to mention in your column
anything on this subject. Regards Mary
Mary sent me an excellent video clip on Capt. Cooper, the skipper
who turned back from safety to do what mariners have done since
the days of sails, rescue their brothers. The people at the EPA do
not weigh the histories and deeds of a good ship and her crew when
they decide to render a 750 foot vessel to scrap metal. In this case
it
is just a way to appease some fringe liberal group. How much will
pulling these ships from the lakes actually help air pollution.
Zero.
Have you ever seen acid rain on the Great Lakes? Have you ever
seen an air pollution alert on Lake Superior? What will you do
when they send your 57 Chevy to the scrap heap because it
doesn't have a lithium ion battery pushing it around? It's not your
problem right now, just the 400 or so people that call those 13
ships
home and live work and eat on them for 9 months of the year BUT
when did you ever know the government to stop when they get a
bit of control. Republican or Democrat it's all about power and who
will pay to use that power.
Enjoy the chips and sorry about the lateness of the chips the past
few days.
buffalo
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Little Johnny Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
One day little Johnny went to school. His teacher said they were
going
to play a game. She would place an object behind her and describe
it.
The first person to get it got a piece of candy. First she said,
"The
object is red and grows on trees."
A kid raised his hand and said "an apple" the teacher said correct.
Then she said, "The object is flat and comes in different colors" a
different kid raises his hand and said it is a notebook!
The teacher said correct.
Then Johnny said, "ooh! ooh! Can I try?"
The teacher said yes.
He stood up and put his hand in his pocket. He said
"The object is round, hard, and has a head on it."
The teacher said "JOHNNY! GO TO THE OFFICE!!"
Johnny said, "No it's a quarter!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
Mother Goose
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<a href="http://www.thepostm
Bad Insurance
http://www.thepostm
<a href="http://www.thepostm
Age
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Random Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am not particularly surprised to learn recently that Democrats
generally have more children than Republicans. After all, who ever
heard of anyone enjoying a good piece of elephants?
A girl went to the doctor with her knees all cut up. The doctor
said,
"What happened to your knees?" She replied, "It's from making love
doggie-style.
besides doggie style?" She said, "Yeah...but my doggie doesn't."
The difference between a rooster, Uncle Sam and an old maid is, a
rooster says, "Cock a doodle do," Uncle Sam says, "Yankee doodle
do,"
and the old maid says, "Any dude'll do."
Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the
possible designers of the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical
engineer. Just look at all the joints." Another said, "No, it was an
electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of
electrical connections.
been a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline
through a recreational area?"
If sex Is music of the soul, an orgasm is the Gland Finale
It has come to the attention of researchers that a previously
unanticipated reaction results when Viagara is taken along with Ex-
Lax. Both products tend to act together and magnify the effects of
the
other. The end result is that you end up both coming and going at
the
same time.
Stan kegel
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Random Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
What do you call a Florida gynecologist? A spreader of old wives'
tails
An elderly gentleman went to the local drug store and asked the
Pharmacist for the little blue "Viagra" pill. The pharmacist asked
"How many?" The man replied, "Just a few, maybe a half dozen. I cut
each one into four pieces." The pharmacist said, "That's too small a
dose. That won't get you through sex." The old fellow said, "Oh, I'm
past eighty years old and I don't even think about sex much anymore.
I
just want it to stick out far enough so I don't pee on my new
shoes...."
Food is better than a man because you don't have to wait an hour for
seconds.
A man asked his neighbor how he kept his car looking so nice and
glossy. The neighbor replied that his wife gave him all her worn out
panties and he used these to polish his car with. Being a bachelor,
he
decided to ask his stenographer for some of hers, so one day at the
office he asked: "By the way, Miss Jones, what do you do with your
panties when you wear them out?" Why," she replied demurely, "If I
can
find them afterwards, I put them back on again!"
What do Jell-O and a woman have in common? They both wiggle when you
eat them.
Stan Kegel
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Are you and Larry serious?" the one girl asked her friend while
they
were talking over cocktails.
"We're still a little short of a meeting of the minds." she replied.
"I want a big, old-fashioned June wedding, and he wants a quickie in
the back seat."
Two elderly women were in a beauty parlor getting their hair done,
when in walks a young chick with a low cut blouse that revealed a
rose tattooed on one breast.
One lady leaned over to the other and said, "She don't know it, but
in 50 years she'll be wearing a long stemmed rose in a hanging
basket."
Thought for the Day: Why is it a wife can buy her husband a lawn
mower for
Christmas, but if he buys her a vacuum cleaner, it's a death
sentence?
A gentleman was lured into a busy florist shop by a large sign in
the
window that read, "Say It With Flowers."
"Wrap up one rose," he told the florist.
"Only one?" the florist asked.
"Just one," the customer replied. "I'm a man of few words."
One guy is very upset and yells at his friend, "You slept with my
wife, you son of a bitch. I am gonna make you pay for what you did."
"Bullshit," replies the other one, "why should I pay twice."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two sweethearts wanted to fly United on the way back to campus after
spring break, but the flight attendant wouldn't let them.
Two men went into a bar. After a few drinks, one said to the other,
"Since you went off college I've been screwing your mother's brains
out!" The second one responded, "I think you've had enough to drink,
Dad."
How is Madonna different from A Rod?
She had a couple of hits last October.
What do you call a truckload of vibrators?
Toys for Twats.
Why do we have orgasms?
How else would we know when to stop?
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cleaning Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Broom (brum) - a long handled brush used for sweeping (also doubles
as a mode of transportation for your mother)
Vacuum (vak' u em) - much like the leaf blower except it
sucks in, instead of blowing out. Don't let this alarm you. It isn't
broken and doesn't need more torque, speed, RAM or whatever it is
you
did to the dishwasher.
Dust Pan (DUH) - Contrary to popular belief, this is where
you sweep the dirt, not under the hallway area rug.
Dust Cloth (dust kloth) - A cloth designated for removing
tiny particles of dirt from every flat surface of the house. Hint:
look for your old "lucky shirt".
Bucket (buk' it) - Cylindric container used for holding soapy water
when mopping the floor. Also known as your mid-evil knight helmet
when you're playing with our seven-year-old.
Mop (mop) - a bundle of coarse yarn, rags or cloth fastened
at the end of a stick. You'll remember this as your dance partner at
the New Year's Eve party last year.
Toilet Brush (toi' lit brush) - Used for scrubbing the inside of the
toilet bowl. I don't care what this looks like, you may NOT use my
shower luffa again!
Oven Cleaner (uv' en Klen' er) - No, not the teenager. This
is an actual product that you buy, spray in the oven and
wipe out two hours later. You won't need your welder's
mask for this task, but if it makes you feel more dangerous, go
ahead.
Sponge (spunj) - used to gently wash away food particles from
dinnerware. It won't be necessary to use your 300psi Power wash set.
That was given to you in hopes of cleaning the exterior of the house
(hint hint).
Squeegee (skwe' je) - Same principle as washing the car windshield,
and yes, real men do squeegee!
Final Note: While Duct tape may be a wonderful plumbers aid, it's
really not the best solution for keeping the bathroom towels in
place, and Jamie's teacher is still asking why his homework was
stuck
to his forehead last week. For these reasons, I have hidden the duct
tape and distributed your picture to the local hardware stores.
Don't
make me call 1-800-Duc Tape
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-
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Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Long Way From Home
http://silverandgol
Autumn's Bounty
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COMEDIAN SOUPY SALES DIES AT 83
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carolyn w/ Hard Times
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Melva sharing from Carol/One Of A Kind
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EXTREME PUMPKINS
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16 Amazing Robot Videos | Singularity Hub Via Wesley
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Steve Bartman incident - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Via Wesley
http://en.wikipedia
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Halloween Graphics, etc
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Between the Dash
http://members.
Free Fonts for Download for Desktop Publishing
http://desktoppub.
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Animal World
Doggie Zone
http://www.petfinde
Kitty Korner
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Movie Links
Olympic 1
http://www.buffalos
Olympic 2
http://www.buffalos
Only in L.A
http://www.buffalos
Onzin
http://www.buffalos
Original Farmers Daughters
http://www.buffalos
Alien Fishing For Humans
http://www.buffalos
Anakondaukus
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Are You Going To Finish Strong
http://www.buffalos
Arkansas Wedding
http://www.buffalos
Baby Girl On Jay Leno Show
http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Blonde Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Let us assume," said the professor, "that you are aboard a small
craft
alone in the Pacific, and you spot a vessel approaching you with
several
thousand sex-starved sailors on board. What would you do in this
situation to avoid any problem?"
"I would attempt to turn my craft in the opposite direction," stated
the
brunette.
"I would pass them, trusting my knife and a bottle of mace to keep
me
safe," responded the redhead.
"Frankly" murmured the blonde, "I understand the situation, but I
fail
to see the problem."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Huge Dick
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Free To Good Home
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Denmark News
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Dont Point
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Taliban Singles
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Gas
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Twin Draft Guards? minimizes energy loss from doors and
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Softly seductive young Brenda
Wants a man who is sweet, kind, and tender,
And thoughtful and bright
And sexually right
But mostly a very big spender.
There once was a woman, Monique,
Who proclaimed an efficient technique:
"One fuck daily's just right."
She did seven one night,
And then found that it made her hole weak.
(Kirk Miller)
While making his Halloween rounds,
A lad on a whorehouse door pounds
The lad says, "Trick or treat."
Madam says, "No way, sweet."
You pay before entering on our grounds.
(Ken Pinkham)
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sidney has a problem with premature ejaculation, so he pays a visit
to a
sex shop for a remedy.
The clerk hands him a little purple can and says, "This is Stay-Hard
spray... put on a little and you can go all night!"
Excited, Sidney takes it home, stashes it in the cellar on a shelf,
and
waits eagerly for bedtime.
Later that night, he sprays some on his member and then goes
upstairs to
his wife. To his utter disappointment, however, the remedy seems to
make
him orgasm quicker than ever.
The next day, Sidney returns to the sex shop, angrily slammed the
can
down on the counter, and snaps, "This stuff makes me worse than
before!"
Upon reading the label, the clerk asks, "I don't suppose your hid
this
stuff on your basement shelf, did you?"
"Yeah, so?"
"You must have grabbed the wrong can, sir... this is Easy-Off."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A young Aussie joins the navy.
On the day he is about to go to sea, his father warned him to be
aware
of gay sailors.
"But dad, how will I know?"
"Trust me son, you will know."
After 6 months at sea, the ship comes into port.
The father was on the dock waiting for his son.
The son, seeing his father, got off the ship and shook his hand.
"Well on, how did it go?"
"Dad, I found out what you meant about gay sailors. One night I was
out
on deck all alone when a man came by and put his hand on my shoulder
so
I threw him overboard." "But how could you tell he was gay?"
"Well, for 3 days he swam behind the boat yelling,
"THROW ME A BUOY, THROW ME A BUOY!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1706
Snugglebug
What is a snugglebug?
A Snugglebug is a critter that cuddles up so close that he or she is
so
close they are almost inside your skin. BJ taught Sandi how to be a
snugglebug. Sandi must have her back to BJ, else her claws will
face
him and scratch him. With her back to him, BJ can pull her close,
then
she is a limp rag doll and will snuggle up head to head and cuddle
north and south with dad.
After Sandi graduated from snugglebug 101, she found out she liked
to toss her head closer to dad to try and get even closer. Soon
Sandi found this was her best way to sleep and after a few minutes
of snugglebugging, she was sound asleep, snoring as loud as dad
could.
Sandi soon told Katie about snugglebugging. Katie asked father
to teach her about the fine art of snugglebugging.
BJ taught Katie. Katie is a bit more energetic, but soon fell in
love with the idea of snugglebugging. Katie also adds the
dimension of sleeping under the blankets and snugglebugging so
this fits her quite well.
Katie and Sandi approached Rudy about snugglebugging.
Rudy started to learn... with different results...
When Rudy tossed his head into Pops.... well, Rudy's head is larger
than Pop's head and weighs as much as a bowling ball and Rudy
has more strength than Sandi or Katie.
BOP!
BJ: Ow!!!
Rudy: I take it the lesson is over for the night.
The herd in Guthrie
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
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