[PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner!(Sunday)



 


THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!


Life is like a hot bath.
The longer you stay,
the more wrinkled you get


GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!

FROM: THE INVESTIGATIVE REPORTS BUREAU OF
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
Wimbledon hopeful Simona Halep wants surgery to reduce the
size of her breasts.  Halep is seen as one of the tennis
stars of the future after winning a host of junior titles
and a place in the final of the junior French Open last year.
But the 5-foot-5-inch Romanian tennis star said she thinks
her 34DD bust is holding her back.

"This fall I'll have a breast reduction operation," Halep
said. "The breasts make me uncomfortable when I play. 
It's the weight that troubles me and my ability to react quickly" she added. 
WILL SOMEONE PLEASE TELL THIS KID THAT WINNING ISN'T EVERYTHING!
THIS SELFISH SPOILED LITTLE BRAT SHOULDN'T BE SO CONSUMED
WITH "WINNING MAJOR TENNIS TOURNAMENTS"! WHAT ABOUT US....
THE HARD-WORKING EVERYDAY FAN?
34DD's?

FOLKS PAY TOP DOLLAR FOR HOOTERS LIKE THAT!  AND MANY OF US
PAY TO SEE THEM. AND THIS LITTLE BRAT WANTS TO HAVE THEM
"REDUCED"?
THE NERVE OF SOME PEOPLE...

We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman

_______________

THE COMICS

implants
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i060.html

tanning salon
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i061.html

doctors confirm
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i062.html

treasury announcement
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i063.html

a sneeze
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i064.html

boys will be boys
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i065.html

big balls
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i066.html

a best seller
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i067.html

censor
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i068.html

what really happened
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/i069.html

_______________
 
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES

BP Spills Coffee
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies100143.html

Obama Bumper Sticker Removal Kit
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies100144.html

The Urinal Cakes
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies100145.html

Baxter Black - So Lucky To Be An American
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies100146.html

demolition call
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies100147.html

vigorin commericial
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies100148.html

now thats a fuckin bike
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies100149.html
________________

POWER POINT DISPLAYS

voted best email of this year
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd290.html

flowers
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd291.html

Victoria
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd292.html

I'm the only female in a house full of guys. Four sons and
a husband. Toilet seat is never down...etc. I'm the only
one who would be using Female products.....correct? A
peculiar thing was happening at my house.
Tampons were disappearing! A few months ago I went to my
cupboard to get out a tampon,and there was only one left.
I could have sworn I had just bought a box the month before.
So, I go back to the store, buy a new box and forget about it.
The next month I go back to the cupboard..... and again....
there is only one tampon left again. What's going on here? Gremlins?
I go to the store and buy another box, and forget about it. I
decided to clean out my two youngest sons closet and at the
bottom of their closet are the wrappers, applicators and the
tampons themselves. I am starting to freak! What are they
doing with them?I get a hold of myself and tell myself that
I am an adult and can handle this, despite the bizarre thoughts
running through my mind. I'm thinking, "Do I have enough money
saved up in the bank for major therapy?" I go to the top of the
stairs and yell for my two youngest sons to "come here!"
They march up the stairs and find me in their room staring into
the bottom of their closet. I said "What are you doing with those?
Those are mine!" My 12 year old looks like a deer caught in the
headlights and is silent.
My 10 year old looks at me all innocent and says. "Well, Mom,
we were playing with our G.I. Joes and stuff... and those make
really good scud missiles... What do you use them for?" To
which I replied: "Never Mind! Go Play!"
_______________

Friedman's worried that he might be gay, so he goes to a psychiatrist.
After a few sessions, the shrink says, "I've got some good news
and some bad news. Which do you want first?"
Friedman says, "Give me the bad news first."
The psychiatrist says, "You definitely have homosexual tendencies."
Friedman says, "After that, what could be the good news?"
The psychiatrist says, "I think you're kinda cute."
______________

Schneider's just waking up from anesthesia after surgery,
and his wife's sitting by his side.
His eyes flutter open and he says, "You're so beautiful."
Then he falls asleep again, and since she had never heard
him say that before, she stays by his side.
A few minutes later, his eyes flutter open again
and he says, "You're cute."
She says, "What happened to 'beautiful'?"
He says, "The drugs are wearing off."
____________

Bill and Hillary were at the Yankee's home opener, sitting in the first
Row, with the Secret Service people directly behind them. One of the
Secret Service guys leaned forward and said something to Bill.
Clinton stared at the guy, looked at Hillary, looked back at the agent,
And nodded his head.
Then Bill picked up Hillary by the coat collar and the seat of her
Pants, and dropped her right over the wall onto the field. She's kicking
And swearing and screaming, and the crowd goes wild. They're cheering,
Applauding, and high-fiving.
Bill is bowing and smiling, when the agent leans forward and says: "I
Said, they want you to throw out the first PITCH!"
_____________

A young couple came into the church office to fill out a pre-marriage
questionnaire form. The young man, who had never talked to a pastor
before, was quite nervous and the pastor tried to put him at ease.
When they came to the question, "Are you entering this marriage of
your own free will?" there was a long pause.
Finally, the girl looked over at the apprehensive young man and said,
"Put down yes."
_______________

Murray had a new flame, and before long they had a difference of
opinion. "I don't like the way you're carrying on with other guys,"
he ranted, "That must stop!"
"Calm down, Murray," she replied, "There's no reason for you to flip.
Listen, don't I always let you take me to shows?"
"Yeah." "And to dinner?"
"That's right." "And don't I let you buy me flowers and clothes, and
other gifts?"
"Yeah." "So what are you getting excited about," she assured him, "I
only use the other guys for love-making."
_____________

BUFFALO BILL

I love my car
http://www.buffaloschips.com/83108.htm

I feel good
http://www.buffaloschips.com/83109.htm

If I was a terrorist
http://www.buffaloschips.com/83110.htm
_______________

FUN PAGES

Crazy Tyre
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=38554&s=n

Online Duck Hunting Game
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41500&s=n

Life of Pun
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41412&s=n

Microwave Chocolate
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=39816&s=n

THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman

 

 


 



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