Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
Have you ever wondered what happened to the 56 men
who signed the Declaration of Independence ?
Five signers were captured by the British as traitors,
and tortured before they died.
Twelve had their homes ransacked and burned.
Two lost their sons serving in the Revolutionary Army;
another had two sons captured.
Nine of the 56 fought and died from wounds or
hardships of the Revolutionary War.
They signed and they pledged their lives, their fortunes,
and their sacred honor.
What kind of men were they?
Twenty-four were lawyers and jurists.
Eleven were merchants,
nine were farmers and large plantation owners;
men of means, well educated,
but they signed the Declaration of Independence
knowing full well that the penalty would be death if
they were captured.
Carter Braxton of Virginia, a wealthy planter and
trader, saw his ships swept from the seas by the
British Navy. He sold his home and properties to
pay his debts, and died in rags.
Thomas McKeam was so hounded by the British
that he was forced to move his family almost constantly.
He served in the Congress without pay, and his family
was kept in hiding. His possessions were taken from him,
and poverty was his reward.
Vandals or soldiers looted the properties of Dillery, Hall, Clymer,
Walton, Gwinnett, Heyward, Ruttledge, and Middleton.
At the battle of Yorktown , Thomas Nelson, Jr., noted that
the British General Cornwallis had taken over the Nelson
home for his headquarters. He quietly urged General
George Washington to open fire. The home was destroyed,
and Nelson died bankrupt.
Francis Lewis had his home and properties destroyed.
The enemy jailed his wife, and she died within a few months.
John Hart was driven from his wife's bedside as she was dying. Their
13 children fled for their lives. His fields and his gristmill were
laid to waste. For more than a year he lived in forests and caves,
returning home to find his wife dead and his children vanished. So,
take a few minutes while enjoying your 4th of July holiday and
silently thank these patriots. It's not much to ask for the price
they paid.
Remember: freedom is never free!
I hope you will show your support by sending this to as many people
as you can, please. It's time we get the word out that patriotism is
NOT a sin, and the Fourth of July has more to it than beer, picnics,
and baseball games.
Enjoy the chips ... buffalo
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After several disastrous attempts to synchronize his own and his
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So Tom phoned his wife - who was equally hungry for some
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Tom came home sheepishly at ten, looking absolutely shattered.
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Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
voyerism at the beach
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sometimes the bear wins
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lazy
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Short Chips
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The new accounts director was dictating a note to her personal
assistant. She paused, uncertain about the proper phrasing in the
next sentence. "Do you 'retire a loan'?" she asked the young man.
"Not when I can help it," he replied with a smile.
A gay masochist is a sucker for punishment.
I was busy sipping on my vodka when I overheard a group of ladies
having a discussion. One was saying how her daughter was very
meticulous and fastidious about herself and the enthusiasm she had
for getting good grades. She said she hoped she would not be so
anal as time went on. Whereupon a blonde in the group who was
showing off her newly acquired breasts, chimed in with, "I used to
be that way too, but as the years passed I've become less anal and
more oral and vaginal."
A good ole boy walks up to a good ole girl and says "Howdy. How you
like to come up to my place and have a little fun?" "Well, I've
heard about you good ole boys. Where exactly are you from?" "I'm
from Kentucky, way up in the hills." "Oh, I've heard about you guys
from Kentucky," she said, "you guys will screw pigs and goats and
cows and chickens..." He interrupts in a very indignant tone,
"CHICKENS?!"
The teacher in Johnny's school asked the class what their parents
did for a living. One little girl said her father was a doctor,
another said her mother was an engineer. When it was Little Johnny's
turn, he stood up and said "My mom's a whore." Naturally, after that
remark, he got sent off to the principal's office. Then, 15 minutes
later, he returned. So the teacher asked "Did you tell the principal
what you said in class?" Johnny said, "Yes." "Well, what did the
principal say?" "He said that every job is important in our economy,
gave me a pocket full of candy and asked for my phone number..."
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Little Johnny Chips
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A Kentucky teacher was quizzing her students. "Johnny, who signed
the Declaration of Independence?"
He was older than some of the others. He said, " Damn if I know who
signed the fucking thing."
She was a little put out by his swearing, so she told him to go home
and to bring his father with him when he came back.
Next day, the father came with his son, sat in the back of the room
to observe, as the teacher requested. She started back in on her
quiz and finally got back to the boy. "Now, Johnny, I'll ask you
again. Who signed the Declaration of Independence?"
"Well, hell, teacher," Johnny said, "I told you I didn't know."
The father jumped up in the back, pointed a stern finger at his son,
and said, "Johnny, if you signed that fucking thing, you damn well
better own up to it!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When a new child visited our Sunday school, the Teacher greeted him
and asked his age. The little Boy held up four fingers.
"Oh, you're 4," said the teacher. "And when will You be 5?"
The child stared at her and after a few seconds Replied, "When I
hold up the other finger."
A gaggle of Jewish ladies at a party were discussing the problem of
one of their daughters, who was planning to marry a Gentile.
Everyone was disturbed about it, and the Rabbi could not help
interrupting with, "Why not? Let her marry a Gentile boy. I'm all
in favor of Jewish girls marrying Gentile boys."
"What?!" gasped the women. "You can't be serious!"
The Rabbi replied, "Of course I'm serious. This is not a problem."
"But why would you say such a thing?" asked the women.
"Because," answered the Rabbi, "why should the Jewish boys have all
the bad luck?"
Mr. Gable had a leak in the roof over his dining room, so he called
a repairman to take a look at it.
"When did you first notice the leak"? the repairman inquired.
Mr. Gable scowled, "Last night, when it took me two hours to finish
my soup!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Sex Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Words You Do Not Want To Hear During Sex
* "You feel almost as good as my wife."
* "You know, your mother is so much better!"
* "Mommy, Daddy what are you doing?"
* "Oh my God!!! 3.5 seconds, a new record"!!!!!!
* "Do you mind? I'm trying to watch TV."
* "Darling, don't you think that the ceiling needs painting?"
* "Oh Janet!" . And your name is Carol
* "Will you please hurry up there is a really good movie coming on
in one minute."
* "Is it hurting? I can't even feel it."
"* Is it in yet?"
* "Do you think your sister would like to join us?"
* "Finished! I didn't think you started yet."
* "But you said you would be through by the time the commercial was
over."
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LynnLynn's Links
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Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Blessings on this Holiday!
http://www.silverandgoldandthee.com/Holid/4Th.OfJuly.html
Melva w/Living off the Land
http://www.silverandgoldandthee.com/Holid/LivingOff.html
Brother Bob's Poems Of The Week:
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John w/ Little Bitty
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Cast Iron Cookware Seasoning
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Freight train vs. tornado
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Weird Rainy Days!
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Okay, let me catch my breathe while I type this because you're not
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Boot safe
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Is it better to leave the computer on or turn it off?
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Seagate Downloads
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Kitty Korner
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Movie Links
1426
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Mrs Hughes
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Friends
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1802
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5700
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Magician Act Followed By Explanation
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Malcom-Jue-Bebe
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Marine And Geese
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Mary Did You Know
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Math 911
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Job Chips
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Bubba applied for an engineering position at a Lake Charles
refinery.
A Yankee applied for the same job. Both applicants, having the same
qualifications, were asked to take a test. Upon completion of the
test, each man had missed only one question out of ten.
The manager went to Bubba and said: "Thank you for your interest,
but we've decided to give the Yankee the job."
Bubba asked, "and why are you giving him the job? We each got nine
questions correct. This being Louisiana, and me being a Southern
boy, I should get the job!"
The manager said, "We have made our decision not on the correct
answers, but rather on the one question that you both missed."
Bubba then asked, "And just how would one incorrect answer be better
than the other?"
The manager replied: "Bubba, it's like this. For question # 4 the
Yankee wrote; 'I don't know.' And you wrote, 'Neither do I.'"
Bubba was hired by BP the next day.
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Toon Chips
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arts
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ass scratch
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Limerick Chips
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A carpenter living in Crewe,
Who had nothing whatever to do,
Once assisted a whore
With the hinge of her door,
But he made her pay for the screw.
My boss is a fellow named Sid
With the mind of an eight-year-old kid
Just outside his door
A sign said, "Wet floor,"
Sid saw it, and read it ... and did!
It's my code," says a mailman named Drew,
"To unzip, then deliver a screw.
If virgins, when nervous,
Resist postal service,
I explain that the male must get through."
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Parting Chips
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It had taken him several months, but the exec had finally persuaded
his new secretary to bend over the back of his leather couch and
allow him to have sex with her that way. "And just where have you
been until this hour?" demanded his wife, when the wayward husband
finally arrived home. "Down at the office," he replied, "working
like a dog."
It was the first day of school. Each member of this third grade
class had to go up to the black board and draw a representation of
their summer. Little Johnny got up and drew a dot. The teacher
asked him what it was supposed to represent. He replied, "It is a
period." The teacher said, "What does that have to do with your
summer?" Johnny said, "Well, my 15 year-old sister couldn't find
hers, so my mom fainted, my dad had a heart attack, and the 21
year-old guy next door shot himself!"
A woman asks her husband to buy her a fur coat for their 25th
anniversary. "Ha!" he snorted. "The day I buy you a fur coat will
be the day you can grow hair on your chest!" On that she hikes up
her skirt, drops her panties, and thrust her pubic area forward.
"There!
I have hair on my chest, now buy me the damn coat!" "That's not your
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"Before we got married, this was your hope chest. On our honeymoon
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Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1830
The 4th of July
Rudy: So what is the deal in Caldwell for the 4th?
BJ: Diana will sing the National Anthem, I am going to talk about
how
the National Anthem was written and then the fireworks will be set
off.
Katie: Then we put our earplugs in?
Diana: Right.
Sandi: Then we get the hot dogs and hamburgers right?
BJ: Right.
Sandi: And the barbque?
Diana: Right.
Sandi: And the desserts?
BJ: Right.
Diana: Let's go get ready.
Sandi: For food?
BJ: Is that all you think about?
Sandi: No, there is sleeping in bed next to you.
The herd in Guthrie
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Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
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711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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