Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
This morning I heard that the 8th place company for the largest
number of home starts is Habitat For Humanity. Even in a community
our size there is always at least 4 homes under construction
and building materials, appliances, plumbing fixtures old and
new are being recycled and reused at the Habitat's Restore
just down the street from me.
This is a great program at a time when people are losing their
homes because they got homes that stretched their budget
with no money down on an ARM and the next thing they lost
their job, a balloon payment came up, or some other expense
and the bank foreclosed. There are people that lost Habitat
Homes because of illness or job loss too but with much
smaller loans for the same size home they generally fared better
the person who went to a showroom and said I'll take one of those.
Now at a time when we should be promoting providing labor to keep
housing costs within your budget, HUD and in this state MSHDA
has cut back on funding for low cost loans for materials to Habitat.
They are still providing loans to convert an old bank building
into offices and housing. There is a reason although it escapes me
but
I would like to see HUD insure that every volunteer and owner that
wants to build a better life has a hammer and nails and boards
to do that with.
Enjoy the chips..... buffalo
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Success Chips
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Four men went golfing one Saturday. Three of them headed to the
first tee and the fourth went into the clubhouse to take care of the
bill. The three men started talking and bragging about their sons.
The first man told the others, "My son is a home builder, and he is
so successful that he gave a friend a new home for free." The second
man said, "My son was a car salesman, and now he owns a multi-line
dealership. He's so successful that he gave a friend a new
Mercedes, fully loaded." The third man, not wanting to be outdone,
bragged, "My son is a stockbroker, and he's doing so well that he
gave a friend an entire portfolio." The fourth man joined them on
the tee after a few minutes of taking care of business. The first
man mentioned, "We are just talking about our sons How is yours
doing?"
The fourth man replied, "Well, my son is gay and go-go dances in a
gay bar." The other three men grew silent as he continued, I'm not
totally thrilled about the dancing, but he must be doing well. His
last three boyfriends gave him a house, a brand new Mercedes, and a
stock portfolio."
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pencil sharpener
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I'm sorry
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Doe Chips
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A dude moved out to Idaho from back east. After a couple weeks he
got so horny he honked. He asked me what he could do about his
condition.
I told him to go down to the Indian reservation and grab himself a
doe.
He asked how to recognize a doe.
I told him she would have a long braid down her back and be wrapped
in a blanket.
The next morning, a chilly day by the way, he dutifully proceeded to
the reservation. He spied an Indian sitting out in front of a
tepee. When he grabbed the Indian the Indian shouted, "Me buck, me
buck!"
The dude replied, "Go ahead and buck you sonofabitch. I can ride
anything with hair on it."
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Condom Chips
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A vet received a phone call very late one Saturday night. "Please
come quick," a very agitated voice on the other end said. "My dog
has swallowed a condom."
"Is he in distress?" the vet asked."
"You don't understand," the voice said. "My dog has swallowed a
condom."
"Yes, but unless the thing has lodged in his throat it will probably
pass through his system without harming the animal."
"Please come quick," the voice went on undeterred. "The dog has
swallowed a condom and my girlfriend is getting very distressed."
Eventually the vet gave in and promised that he would come round
right away. He was just putting his coat on when the phone rang
again. "About the dog that swallowed the condom," said the voice,
it was a lot calmer now. "Panic over, we've found another one in
the drawer
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Donkey Chips
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Your Donkey...My Donkey
Thanks to rubin
What do you call a donkey with one leg?
A wonky donkey.
What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye?
A winky wonky donkey.
What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye makin' love? A
bonky winky wonky donkey.
What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, makin' love
while breaking wind? A stinky bonky winky wonky donkey.
What do you call a donkey with one leg and one eye, masturbating
while breaking wind? A stinky wanky winky wonky donkey? Nope ,
rubin hehheh
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Short Chips
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Sweating profusely in his new t-shirt and long pants, a tribesman in
a tropical jungle asks the missionary, "If I did not know about God,
the devil, and sin, like going around naked as our people have
always done, would I go to hell?"
The missionary answers, "No, not if you didn't know."
Upon which the tribesman demands, "Then why did you tell me!?"
Bert and Mabel were a week away from their wedding day. Bert was
beginning to get major stirrings so he decided to chance his arm.
"Er, Mabel, as it is only a week to the big day, how's about a quick
screw?" said Bert. Mabel's answer as expected was, "No Bert, it's
only 6 days to go, however you can have a look at your prize." The
next night Bert again pesters Mabel. Being an understanding sort,
Mabel gives in and says, "It is still 5 days to go and as you've
been a good fellow, I'll let you have a little feel of your prize."
It only makes matters worse for Bert and by the next night he can
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Bert and whispers in his ear, "I can see what your problem is but
you've still got 4 days to go. I will however let you have a good
sniff of your prize." Not being bashful, Bert lifts Mabel's skirts
and sniffs. After a minute he comes up for air, "Mabel, do you
think it will keep 'til Saturday?!?"
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LynnLynn's Links
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If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
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Subscribers and Friends
Melva/ Old Mill Stream
http://www.silverandgoldandthee.com/Misc2/oldmillstream.html
Carolyn w / Sixteen Reasons ~Connie Stevens
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Surfin Surfari
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National Watermelon Promotion Board
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God's Bumper Stickers!
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Okay, everyone is telling me that I'm an insane millionaire who must
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Okay, let me catch my breathe while I type this because you're not
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
POST codes
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Kitty Korner
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Movie Links
Italian Chewing Gum
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Dead or Alive Holly Vance
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James David Manning
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Jeff Dunham & Bubba
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High Power Worker
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Home Security
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Condom Chips
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When the Software industry had badly gone down, three software
giants. Sun, SCO(UNIX), and Microsoft started producing condoms and
named them Java-condom, CondomiX, and MS-Condoms Vista respectively.
A customer using Java-condom complained to Sun that the condom
didn't fit correctly.
Sun replied: "Wait till we get the ISO standard".
They boasted that it would fit any size irrespective of the
underlying structure. Well, the customer switched to CondomiX and
found that by the time he would finish reading the instructions
given along with it, his wife would fall asleep, and he himself
would forget why he was using CondomiX.
Finally, he switched to MS-Condoms Vista. To his surprise it was so
good.....and comfortable! He used it happily.
Six months later, he found that his wife was pregnant.
He got angry and complained to Microsoft. He got the following
reply from Microsoft:
A PATCH IS COMING SOON...!!!
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Toon Chips
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An Alien on the moon
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Anal sex
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Analist
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Limerick Chips
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I had a dog named Lucky
Who was a horny fucky
One day he found
The neighbor's hound
And got his sausage stucky!
There once was an actor from Wales
His beauty was hard to detail
His talent was none
His career was soon done
When the papers said, "he's not a male!"
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Parting Chips
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A first grade teacher had a small number of children
gathered around a table for a reading group.
After the story was read she gave the children
a worksheet to do.
She thought they may have some problems
so wanted them to work on it there.
She heard a little girl say very softly "damn!".
The teacher leaned over and said quietly,
"We don't say that in school."
The little girl looked at the teacher,
her eyes got very big and she said,
"Not even when things get all fucked up?!"
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Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1833
The New Thing
Rudy: Toots, so where do we sleep?
Diana: I have the doggie beds spread out on the sun room floor.
Val: I am used to sleeping with dad.
Diana: You are here with me now and dad is with Sandi and Katie.
Val: I want to go to Guthrie now!
Diana: No, you and Rudy and the cats are with me now.
Rudy: It will be okay little one. Besides Toots has this futon
mattress
for us as a doggie bed also right Toots?
Diana: Correct, it is in the guest room.
Val: We have our own room?
Diana: For a while. This next weekend Dad will bring a couch, love
seat, recliner and our tile. Each week more and more of our home
will get here from Guthrie.
Rudy: See girl, everything will be okay.
Val: Then the last load will have Sandi, Katie and Dad?
Diana: Right.
Val: Okay, I am ready for bed.
The other half of the herd
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Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
To unsubscribe send a blank e-mail to Buffalos-adult-jokes-unsubscribe@egroups.com
Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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