THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
Utility is when you have one telephone,
luxury is when you have two, opulence is when
you have three - and paradise is when you have none.
Doug Larson
Let us buy you a Toshiba Satellite Laptop-
details inside
http://www.tinyurl.com/yalu3gc
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
I have to admit, that little "Gotcha" I set up
on the so called, "This" website was a good un, eh?
Mike wrote in to tell me that he figgered my hour
glass was broke cuz I had too much time on my hands:)
Patricia gave me a big ole "Boo hiss) on it lol.
A couple of other of you folks wrote in to say a couple
other things. We won't talk about that. But overall,
I really enjoyed putting one over on all of y'all:)
And in case you missed it...
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/this.html
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
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THE COMICS
panties
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/p030.html
Vegas
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/p031.html
Now Ronald
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/p032.html
Inflatable wife
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/p033.html
crash test
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/p034.html
the enterprise
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/p035.html
just because
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/p037.html
wear a condom
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/p038.html
a note for the snow plow guy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/p039.html
_____________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
old rock star songs
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9211.html
a stunt driver
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9212.html
I love you
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9213.html
styl in hockey
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9214.html
the cucumber
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9215.html
accidents
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9216.html
wrecking ball
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9217.html
_________________
The only cow in a small town in Latrobe Valley in
Victoria, stopped giving milk. The people did some
research & found they could buy a cow up in Woy Woy
in NSW for $200.They bought the cow from Woy Woy in
N.S.W & the cow was wonderful.It produced lots of
milk all of the time, & the people were pleased & very
happy.They decided to acquire a bull to mate with
the cow & produce more cows like it.They would never
have to worry about their milk supply again.They bought
a bull & put it in the pasture with their beloved cow.
However, whenever the bull came close to the cow, the
cow would move away No matter what approach the bull
tried, the cow would move away from the bull & he could
not succeed in his quest.The people were very upset &
decided to ask the local Veterinarian, who was very wise,
what to do. They told the vet what was happening. "Whenever
the bull approaches our cow, she moves away" they said.
"If he approaches from the back, she moves forward. When
he approaches her from the front, she backs off."
"An approach from the side & she walks away to the other
side." The veterinarian thinks about this for a minute & asks,
"Did you buy this cow in Woy Woy in N.S.W?"
The people were dumbfounded, since they had never mentioned
where they bought the cow."You are truly a wise Vet," they said.
"How did you know we got the cow in Woy Woy?"
The veterinarian replied, with a distant look in his eye;
"My wife is From Woy Woy."
______________
A man drove too fast down a country lane and skidded
on black ice into a ditch.Fortunately a farmer appeared
moments later, leading a big black horse.When he saw the
mans predicament,he offered to help."If we tie the rope
from the horse to the car,I think old Black Bess here
will be able help it out".So they tied the rope from the
horse to the car and the farmer shouted, "Come on
Starlight,pull as hard as you can!" but the horse didnt
move.The farmer then shouted,"Come on Silky,one,two,three.
Pull"But still the horse didnt move,so for a third time the
farmer yelled"OK,Dobbin,pull now"Nothing happened.Then he
called,"Go on Black Bess,my beauty,pull hard".
This time the horse took the strain and slowly pulled the
car out of the ditch.The motorist was very thankful but also
a little puzzled."I hope you dont mind me asking"he said"but
why did you call your horse by all the different names?"
"Well its like this,"explained the farmer."Old Black Bess is
blind and if she thought she was the only one pulling, she
would never have bothered trying".
____________
A German, an American and an Englishman were exploring
the jungle when they came across an breathtakingly beautiful
waterfall.After admiring it for a while, the American says,
"When I look at this waterfall, I think of the great American
Constitution, you know,where every atom of water is like an
individual who has the freedom to make it's own way through
the world in unison with nature."The German says, "When I look
at this waterfall, I think of the great German economy, strong
and powerful and smooth running."
The Englishman, when asked about his thoughts says, "When I
look at this waterfall, I think of oral sex."
The American and the German look at him in amazement.
"What is it about this waterfall makes you think of oral sex?"
"Uh, everything I look at makes me think of oral sex."
____________
At the end of the tax year, the IRS office sent an inspector
to audit the books of a local hospital.While the IRS agent was
checking the books he turned to the CFO of the hospital and said,
"I notice you buy a lot of bandages. What do you do with the end
of the roll when there's too little left to be of any use?"
"Good question," noted the CFO. "We save them up and send them
back to the bandage company and every now and then they send us
a free box of bandages."
"Oh," replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual
question had a practical answer. But on he went, in his obnoxious way.
"What about all these plaster purchases? What do you do with what's
left over after setting a cast on a patient?"
"Ah, yes," replied the CFO, realizing that the inspector was trying
to trap him with an unanswerable question. "We save it and send it
back to the manufacturer, and every now and then they send us a
free package of plaster."
"I see," replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could
fluster the know-it-all CFO. "Well," he went on, "What do you do
with all the leftover foreskins from the circumcisions you perform?"
"Here, too, we do not waste," answered the CFO. "What we do is
save all the little foreskins and send them to the IRS Office,
and about once a year they send us a complete dick."
_____________
FUN PAGES
Funny Talent Show Audition
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=40871&s=n
Phoenix Arcade Game
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41548&s=n
Illegal Swim
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41426&s=n
The Devil In The Kid
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=40651&s=n
_________
BUFFALO BILL
Taint
http://www.buffaloschips.com/vgffdesw.htm
Taint Taster
http://www.buffaloschips.com/nbcfsxfd.htm
Time to Leave Home
http://www.buffaloschips.com/mhfdesere.htm
________
SYDESJOKES LIST
How Not To Work Out
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000753.html
How To Break Up With a Woman
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000754.html
How to Change a Tyre
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000755.html
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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