THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
"A doctor's reputation is made by the number
of eminent men who die under his care."
~George Bernard Shaw
Stop Your Dog's Annoying Barking -
As Seen on TV
Stop Dog's Annoying Barking Anytime, Anywhere!
New Portable Device that is Inaudible to Human
Ears & Painless to Pups You Control the Ultrasonic
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Teaching him the Difference from Nuissance
Barking vs. Barking that Protects Your Family!
Portable, Wireless, and Battery Powered-Automatic,
No Buttons to Push
As Seen on TV-Buy One, Get One FREE
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http://tinyurl.com/yessoy7
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
TOP 10 Reasons to Smile!
1) It looks better than a frown
2) It improves your day
3) It makes other people's day brighter
4) Make new friends
5) Shows friendship
6) Leaves favorable impressions
7) Enjoyable to give and receive
8) Makes you look happy, confident, and self-assured
9) Puts others at ease
10) A smile could be the start of a lifetime relationship!
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_______________
THE COMICS
when you finish
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t001.html
hallucinations
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t002.html
crops
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t003.html
ass
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t004.html
under five bux
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t005.html
light the fuse
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t006.html
rotten service
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t007.html
you're new
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t008.html
wedgies
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/t009.html
_______________
LETS GO OUT
Love is blue
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9341.html
don't go out
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9342.html
now that's drunk!
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9343.html
Mexican ambulance
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9344.html
wipeout
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9345.html
firetrucks
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9346.html
I have no secrets
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9347.html
___________
Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years,
reunited at a party. After several drinks, one of the
men had to use the rest room. Those who remained
talked about their kids....... The first guy said,
'My son is my pride and joy.He started working at a
successful company at the bottom of the barrel.
He studied Economics and Business Administration and
soon began to climb the corporate ladder and now he's
the president of the company. He became so rich that
he gave his best friend a top of the line Mercedes
for his birthday.' The second guy said, 'Darn, that's
terrific! My son is also my pride and joy. He started
working for a big airline, then went to flight school
to become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in
the company, where he owns the majority of its assets.
He's so rich that he gave his best friend a brand new
jet for his birthday.' The third man said: 'Well,
that's terrific! My son studied in the best universities
and became an engineer. Then he started his own
construction company and is now a multimillionaire.
He also gave away something very nice and expensive to
his best friend for his birthday: A 30,000 square foot
mansion.' The three friends congratulated each other just
as the fourth returned from the restroom and asked:
'What are all the congratulations for?One of the three
said: 'We were talking about the pride we feel for
the successes of our sons. ..What about your son?'
The fourth man replied: 'My son is gay and makes a
living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub.'
The three friends said: 'What a shame...what a disappointment.'
The fourth man replied: 'No, I'm not ashamed. He's my
son and I love him. And he hasn't done too badly either.
His birthday was two weeks ago and he received a beautiful
30,000 square foot mansion, a brand new jet and a top of
the line Mercedes from his three boyfriends.'
______________
Two medical students were walking along the street
when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread
apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly.
One student said to his friend: "I'm sure that poor
old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just
like that." The other student says: "No, I don't
think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki
Syndrome. He walks slowly and his legs are apart
just as we learned in class." Since they couldn't
agree they decided to ask the old man. They approached
him and one of the students said to him:
"We're medical students and couldn't help but notice
the way you walk, but we couldn't agree on the syndrome you
might have. Could you tell us what it is?"
The old man said, "I'll tell you, but first you tell
me what you two fine medical students think."
The first student said, "I think its Peltry Syndrome."
The old man said, "You thought....... But you are wrong."
The other student said, "I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome."
The old man said, "You thought....... But you are wrong."
So they asked him, "Well, old timer, what do you have?"
The old man said, "I thought it was a Fart........
............. But I was wrong, too!"
_____________
Wiremu, a New Zealander, was in Australia to watch the
upcoming Rugby World Cup and was not feeling well, so
he decided to see a doctor. "Hey doc, I dun't feel so
good, eh" said Wiremu. The doctor gave him a thorough
examination and informed Wiremu that he had
long existing and advanced prostate problems and that
the only cure was testicular removal.
"No way doc" replied Wiremu "I'm gitting a sicond opinion eh!"
The second Aussie doctor gave Wiremu the same diagnosis
and also advised him that testicular removal was the only cure.
Not surprisingly, Wiremu refused the treatment. Wiremu
was devastated, but with the Rugby World Cup just around
the corner he found an expat Kiwi
doctor and decided to get one last opinion from someone
he could trust. The Kiwi doctor examined him and said:
"Wiremu Cuzzy Bro, you huv Prostate
suckness eh" "What's the cure thin doc ?"
asked Wiremu hoping for a
different answer. "Wull, Wiremu", said the Kiwi doctor "Wi'regonna huv
to cut off your balls." "Phew, thunk god for thut!" said Wiremu,
"those Aussie bustards wanted to
take my test tickets off me!"
________________
After a fulfilling life with the now dead prince, she
happily sat upon her rocking chair, watching the world
go by from her front porch, with a cat named Bob for
companionship.One sunny afternoon, out of nowhere,
appeared the fairy godmother. Cinderella said, 'Fairy
Godmother, what are you doing here after all these years'?
The fairy godmother replied, 'Cinderella, you have lived an
exemplary life since I last saw you. Is there anything for
which your heart still yearns?'Cinderella was taken aback,
overjoyed, and after some thoughtful consideration,
she uttered her first wish:'The prince was wonderful,
but not much of an investor. I'm living hand to mouth
on my disability checks, and I wish I were wealthy beyond comprehension.'
Instantly her rocking chair turned into solid gold.
Cinderella said, 'Ooh, thank you, Fairy Godmother'..
The fairy godmother replied, 'It is the least that I can
do. What do you want for your second wish?'
Cinderella looked down at her frail body, and said, 'I
wish I were young and full of the beauty and youth I
once had.' At once, her wish became reality, and her
beautiful young Body returned. Cinderella felt stirrings
inside of her that had been dormant for years.
And then the fairy godmother spoke once more:
'You have one more wish; what shall it be?'
Cinderella looked over to the frightened cat in the corner
and said, 'I wish for you to transform Bob, my old cat,
into a kind and handsome young man.'
Magically, Bob suddenly underwent so fundamental a change
in his biological make-up that, when he stood before her,
he was a man so beautiful the likes of him neither she nor
the world had ever seen.The fairy godmother said,
'Congratulations, Cinderella, enjoy your new life.'
With a blazing shock of bright blue electricity,
the fairy godmother was gone as suddenly as she had appeared.
For a few eerie moments, Bob and Cinderella looked
into each other's eyes. Cinderella sat, breathless,
gazing at the most beautiful, stunningly perfect man
she had ever seen.Then Bob walked over to Cinderella, who
sat transfixed in her rocking chair, & held her close in
his young muscular arms.He leaned in close, blowing her
golden hair with his warm breath as he whispered...
'Bet you're sorry you neutered me.'
______________
Bubbles and Barbie, two blonde sisters, had promised their
Uncle Jim, who had been a seafaring gentleman all his life,
to bury him at sea when he died.
In due time, he did pass away, and the two blondes kept
their promise. They set off from Clearwater Beach with
their uncle all stitched up in a burial bag and loaded
him onto their rowboat.After a while Bubbles said, "Do
you think we're out far enough, Barbie?"
Barbie slipped over the side. Finding the water only knee
deep, she said, "Nope, not yet, Bubbles." So they rowed a
little farther out.Again Bubbles asked Barbie, "Do you
think we're out far enough now?"
Once again Barbie slipped over the side and almost
immediately said, "No, this will never do; the water
is only up to my chest."
So on they rowed and rowed and rowed, and finally Barbie
slipped over the side and disappeared. Quite a bit of time
went by, and poor Bubbles was really getting worried when
suddenly Barbie broke the surface, gasping for breath.
"Well, is it deep enough yet, sis?"
"Yes, finally. Hand me the shovel."
____________
FUN PAGES
Top 5 Dangerous Sports Pics
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=40836&s=n
Tron Game
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41565&s=n
Driving Skills
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=38549&s=n
Beautiful Satin Negligee
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=5272&s=n
____________
BUFFALO BILL
Walk It Out Granny
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7808.htm
Water Park Prank
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7809.htm
wdrb
http://www.buffaloschips.com/7810.htm
___________
SYDESJOKES LIST
Japanese Mall Fountain
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000837.html
Japanese Subway
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000838.html
Japp Advert
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000839.html
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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