Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
It hit 60 today and I finally opened the door and let the cats go
out
and do a little patrolling in the neighborhood. Yoda couldn't make
it
out the door because Eva had it guarded and I eventually had to
close the door because Eva was trying to work her way out to the
porch.
The good weather and a slight upturn in the steel industry has
led to the government opening the locks on the 21st instead of the
25th Ice downriver is light and after you get past Whitefish Bay
there is plenty of open water all the way to Duluth.
I talked to Nancy awhile ago and she is currently somewhere in
Arkansas headed north with my cousin and her Jeep. Those who
have been waiting for an answer from her on a computer issue
will have an answer when they hit Wisconsin and have internet again.
Enjoy the chips... buffalo
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please visit our Sponsor
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hanging StrawberryT is the Amazing All-Season Indoor and Outdoor
Hanging Strawberry Garden. Pot in soil or any other potting medium
and you'll have sweet, delicious strawberries in just 60 days. Now
you can enjoy strawberries all year long. It also makes a great
decorative hanging basket.
The package includes:
. 8 1/2 inch Hanging Basket
. 3 Tri-Star Strawberry Plants
. Our Easy Care Instructions
. Secret Jam Recipe
Buy 1 Get 1 Free Now for only $10 PLUS bonus gifts!
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Robbery Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A very particular thief made off with a model of Jenna Jameson's
private parts and nothing more from an adult store in Fullerton
early Tuesday morning.
.
Surveillance video caught the burglar in the act. This is the story
of a bizarre burglar, an adult erotica shop and a sex toy from Jenna
Jameson's line. Not just any toy, but a $250 model of Jameson's
naughty bits. The product has an official name, but as you may have
guessed, it's entirely too inappropriate to mention on a
family-friendly Web site. (Did I mention this is a creepy, awkward
story?)
Tawny Marshall, the manager of The Erogenous Zone (2449 E.
Orangethorpe) , could hardly believe it when police informed her
that a thief had targeted her store earlier this week. But she was
even more surprised when she saw the surveillance tape.
At about 4 a.m. on April 15, a man threw a large rock at the store's
front door. Twice. When he failed to break the glass, he moved on to
one of the front windows. He then used the same rock to shatter that
window, break a neon light and gain access to the store. Footage
shows him nonchalantly walk over to the cash register, which he was
unable to open. You would think he would have shown signs of
frustration at this point, but no, he casually picks up a life-size
model of Jenna Jameson's mid-section and walks out of the store. At
least he didn't leave empty-handed.
"It's kinda funny," Marshall said. "He didn't even spend any time
here, really."
Sgt. Mike MacDonald of the Fullerton Police Department agrees and
speculates that the thief left with the one thing he really wanted.
"This ranks right up there with some of the more bizarre ones I've
seen," MacDonald said.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
cool
http://www.thepostm
boss keeps her
http://www.thepostm
can you hear me now?
http://www.thepostm
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tiger Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
To my wife...I'm sorry. I fucked up but I'm not changing so you'll
either need to put up with this shit or I'll stroke you the check I
agreed to in the pre-nup....sorry, if I weren't the pro golfer, I
wouldn't have so many women coming after me!
To my fans, get over it. Where I stick my dick is none of your
business. If you care....sorry.
I don't need any of you in order to make 10 times in one year what
you'll make in a career. I promise to continue to hit 4 irons from
210 yards to within 10' of the hole and drop puts that you couldn't
read in a million years. If that's not good enough for you, go watch
tennis.
To the media. You cocksuckers are the only ones more two-faced than
I am. Kissing my ass for all those years and then ripping me every
chance you've had since Thanksgiving. Fuck all ya'll. I'm glad I
don't have to take the time to sit and answer the same bullshit
questions over and over again.
To the other golfers. Kiss my cablanasian ass! You motherfuckers
come out ripping me when I've put more fucking money in your pockets
than you could count. You think anyone's been paying to see
Jesper-fucking-
to give up golf just to punish you guys but I think it's going to be
more fun to practice for the next few weeks and get back to making
you all my bitches.
That's all I got today folks.....see ya at Augusta !....Oh and
Bambi, if you're listening I'll meet you at the Ritz in 45 minutes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Swivel and sweep in any direction
The Swivel Sweeper G2 is the new and improved floor and carpet
sweeper that lets you clean dirt and messes faster and easier than
ordinary cordless sweepers. The cordless G2 sweeper features a 360
degree swiveling head and quad brush technology. With a magnetic
storage latch the G2 folds up to take less room than a broom.
Additional Ordering Details:
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Snow White Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
One day, the seven dwarfs were coming home after a hard day of work.
As they approached the house, they heard some sounds coming from the
garden.
Their curiosity aroused, they stood on each other's shoulders until
finally one of them could see over the garden wall.
The dwarf at the top saw Snow White and the prince sitting and
talking in the garden. He said to the other dwarf, "Snow White is
with the Prince."
This news gets passed down to all the dwarfs:
"Snow White is with the Prince."
"Snow White is with the Prince."
"Snow White is....." (and so on) until it has reached all the
dwarfs.
Then the dwarf at the top says, "They're kissing."
Again the chain starts:
"They're kissing."
"They're kissing."
"They're kissing."
"They're ......."
"He's taking off her clothes."
"He's taking off her clothes."
"He's taking off her clothes."
"He's taking off..."
"They're both nude now."
"They're both nude now."
"They're both nude now."
"They're both..."
"He's about to enter her."
"He's about to enter her."
"He's about to enter her."
"He's about to..."
At this point, Snow White hears a sound near the wall, and so she
gets up to investigate.
The dwarf at the top sees this and says, "She's coming!"
"So am I."
"So am I."
"So am I."
"So am I."
"So am I."
"So am I."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Background Check Them-You have the Right to Know the Truth!
As the news continues to reminds us, it's pretty easy to pretend to
be someone your not in this day and age. For the first time ever,
you can find out real and truthful information about people through
America's #1 Background Check. So next time you just aren't 100%
certain of the truth, protect yourself with an instant Background
Check.
Our Comprehensive Background Reports will show:
-Criminal Records
-Current and Previous Addresses
-Age and Date of Birth
-Relatives
-Property Value
-Social Network Scans
-So Much More
For a 7-Day Free Trial of Unlimited Background Checks
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
One morning a little girl ran inside and said Daddy, Daddy my sister
and the man you hired last week are up on the hay loft in the barn
on all that new hay we just bought. She has her dress up and he has
his pants down. I think they are about to piss all over that new
hay!
Wendy and Becky went out for a night on the town and got just
totally blitzed. At the end of the evening they decided to take a
short cut through a cow pasture after being unable to find a ride
home.
They became lost so split up to try and find the road home. Wendy
doubled back only to stumble on Becky laying flat on her back
sucking on, and playing with a cow's udders.
Wendy screamed "what are you doing"?
Becky replied "shut up, with all these guys here someone'll drive us
home!"
A blonde named Mary was walking down the street and she saw a sign
on a fabric store window that said 'FELT FOR $.25'.
Mary Jane just laughed and laughed, 'Ha, ha, ha, ha...', because she
knew that she could get felt for free.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Amazing New Stretch-To-Fit Food Covers - Free Sample Pack Available
CoverMate stretch-to-fit food covers are the quick and easy way to
save food and keep it fresh.
The built in flex ban stretches over any dish, bowl or plate in
seconds for the perfect seal.
CovermMate food covers are reusable and dishwasher safe.
Limited time offer so act now.
Click the link below for more information:
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Farmer Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A farmer stopped by the local mechanics shop to have his truck
fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't
live far and would just walk home.
On the way home he stopped at the hardware Store and bought a bucket
and a gallon of paint. He then stopped by the feed store and picked
up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, struggling outside the
store he now had a problem - how to carry his entire purchases home.
While he was scratching his head he was approached by a little old
lady who told him she was lost. She asked, 'Can you tell me how to
get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane ?'
The farmer said, 'Well, as a matter of fact, my farm is very close
to that house I would walk you there but I can't carry this lot.'
The old lady suggested, 'Why don't you put the can of paint in the
bucket. Carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm
and carry the goose in your other hand?'
'Why thank you very much,' he said and proceeded to walk the old
girl home.
On the way he says 'Let's take my short cut and go down this alley.
We'll be there in no time.'
The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said, 'I am a
lonely widow without a husband to defend me.. How do I know that
when we get in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull
up my skirt, and have your way with me?'
The farmer said, 'Holy smokes lady! I'm carrying a bucket, a gallon
of paint, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I
possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?'
The old lady replied, 'Set the goose down, cover him with the
bucket, put the paint on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the
chickens'
Harveythefrogprince
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Get Strong, Sculpted Arms and Shoulders
The Shake Weight is the revolutionary new way to shape and tone your
arms, and it is designed specifically for women. Scientific studies
prove that the Shake Weight increases upper body muscle activity by
more than 300% compared to traditional weights.
Additional Ordering Details:
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hunting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
One Friday night a man tells his wife that he is going duck hunting
in the morning.
She says, "I want to go too."
He says, "NO... You are too hard to wake up."
She begged him, "Please, Please. I promise I will wake up early."
He says, "O.K. but if you wont get up, I'm going to screw you up
the ass or you are going to give me a blow job."
She said, "I've got nothing to worry about because I will wake up."
3:00am the next morning the alarm goes off. The man gets up and
tries
to wake up his wife. She's still laying there and he tells her that
he is going to take a shower and when he gets out she'd better be
up.
He gets out of the shower and she is still sleeping. He tells her he
is going to give her one more chance to wake up. He has to go out
and
get their stuff and put the dogs in the truck and when he comes back
in she has to be awake or she has to pay up. He's out there about
30 minutes and when he comes back in his wife is snoring.
He is pissed. He wakes her up.
He said, "OK now whats it going to be? In the ass or a blow job?"
She said, "all right... I can't take in the ass so I will give you a
blow job."
He pulls out his cock and she starts sucking on it.
Then she begins to spit and spit. She says, "THAT TASTES LIKE
SHIT!!!"
He said, "Yeah, I know, the dogs didn't want to wake up either."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Clean-n-Green Laundry Ball
Imagine never buying laundry detergent again. Replace detergent with
Laundry Ball and you'll not only save money, but you'll be saving
the planet too. Each ball lasts up to 1000 to 1200 uses, sometimes
longer. Laundry Ball uses natural cleaning power oppose to
chemical-laden, water-polluting ingredients like laundry detergent.
Get the benefits of Laundry Ball today.
View Website
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Virginia Flat Bread
http://silverandgol
From Kathryn/Daylight Savings
http://adreamandasm
Rick w/ Happy St. Patrick's Day 2010
http://www.wtv-
Spring Rise
http://www.poetryby
Sweet Little Pad
http://www.shangral
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Now It's Your Turn To SCOOP UP some cash.
Wireless companies have accidentally stumbled and "opened up" an
impressive income opportunity to grab during the worst economy we've
seen in over 50 years.
And here's everything they don't want you to know...
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Surfin Surfari Via Wesley
UCompareHealthCare - Find Information on Doctors and Hospitals
http://www.ucompare
Sizing Up Sperm | National Geographic Channel
http://tinyurl.
Where is my Milk from?
http://www.whereism
They make their mark in mug shot history - CNN.com
http://tinyurl.
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Okay, everyone is telling me that I'm an insane millionaire who must
have gone absolutely crazy for doing this today and tomorrow,
especially on Thankgiving of all days, but I don't care anymore
because I think it's just the right thing to do.
Okay, let me catch my breathe while I type this because you're not
going to believe this...First off, thank you so much for taking a
minute to read this, my name is Justin Blake, and I'm a millionaire
that was dared to do something insane tonight and tomorrow morning,
and if you're interested in knowing what it is then read below, but
you'll need to hurry because you may only have a few minutes to take
advantage of this:
As part of an insane marketing test, I'm giving away my Online
Business Kit, but I'm only giving it away this today and tomorrow
morning.....
Press here to get your copy:
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Linux.com Store Via Wesley
http://store.
WebStats Program
http://www.phpmyvis
Open Source Web Design~ Templates
http://www.oswd.
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Listen, you will have no one but yourself to blame if you don't go
on an intimate date this weekend with a beautiful single woman or
man! NO ONE BUT YOURSELF TO BLAME!!!
Why will we blame you? Because we are giving away memberships to our
ADULTS ONLY dating community this week....and you can get one right
now for no cost...but we will not be giving them away forever.
PRESS HERE to meet single women or men this week for an intimate
date:
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Animal World
Doggie Zone
http://ritemail-
Kitty Korner
World Of Big Cats
http://www.shangral
*+*+*+*+*+*+
We understand that you may have accidentally deleted important
documents, pictures, or other various files from your computer that
you thought you could never get back.
Well, we wanted to let you know that you can easily get your deleted
pictures, documents, or files back today using a program called File
R/D.
You can easily try File R/D right now, for no cost, to run a -free-
analysis scan that will allow you to view deleted pictures, files,
documents, etc... Once you have complete the -free- analysis scan
you will be amazed by what you see! In fact, you will even see what
other people have deleted from your computer.
Once the scanning is complete you will have full control over which
files you want to recover.
Press here to run the -free- analysis scan:
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Here is some more information about this new way to watch
television:
1) All of the programming is uncensored!
2) There are hundreds of channels from around the world to watch!
And new channels are added every day!
3) Hundreds of Radio stations to listen to anytime, all of the time!
And new stations are added daily!
4) All of these channels are available 24 hours per day right from
your PC and laptop!
5) No additional hardware is needed!
6) You won't have to pay a cable or satellite bill any longer!
Press Here For More Information and To Download Now:
http://buffalosjoke
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Movie Links
Honest Stopper
http://www.buffalos
Never Point An RPG at A Marine
http://www.buffalos
Racism On A Plane
http://www.buffalos
Self Smart
http://www.buffalos
NYPD Training Video
http://www.buffalos
Happy New Year
http://www.buffalos
Hard Day
http://www.buffalos
Helicopter
http://www.buffalos
Hilarious Prank
http://www.buffalos
Hombres
http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Fish and Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A gent from Chicago was on a fishing vacation up north in the
Wisconsin woods. He was out fishing on a lake in a small boat and
not
having much luck.
He noticed a man in another small boat that was close by, open his
tackle box and take out a mirror. Being curious the man rowed over
and enquired, "What is the mirror for?"
"That's my secret way to catch fish," replied the other man. "I
shine
the mirror on the top of the water. The fish notice the spot of sun
on the water above and they swim up to the surface. Then I just
reach
down, net them and pull them into the boat."
"Wow! Does that really work?" exclaimed the guy from Chicago
"You bet it does." was the response.
"Would you be interested in selling that mirror? I'll give you $50
for it." offered the big city gent.
"Well, okay." said the country guy. After the money was
transferred,
catch this week?"
"You're the sixth."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Windshield Wonder is the easy reach microfiber window cleaner that
eliminates straining and stretching. It uses a 16" handle to help
reach all the way down to the dash and base of your rear window.
Windshield Wonder is also perfect for moisture and fog removal.
Get two for the price of one when you order today.
Order now
View Web Version
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
carpet munch
http://www.buffalos
carrier
http://www.buffalos
carrying donuts
http://www.buffalos
car sex
http://www.buffalos
name misspelled
http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Optic 1050 binoculars with up to 1000X magnification will allow
you to see objects up to 35 miles away! They're great for
vacationing, sporting events, bird watching, and more. These super
lightweight binoculars include features such as:
Wide-angle viewing
Shatterproof lenses
Soft rubber eye cups
Comfort neck strap
Center focusing wheel
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The nipples of Sarah Sarong,
When excited, were twelve inches long.
This embarrassed her lover
Who was pained to discover
She expected no less of his dong.
-----
Two lesbians north of the town
Made sixty-nine love on the ground.
Their unbridled lust
Leaked out in the dust
And made so much mud that they drowned.
-----
There was a young man of Khartoum
Who lured a poor girl to her doom.
He not only fucked her,
But buggered and sucked her,
And left her to pay for the room.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rainbow Peppers - Grow 5 Different Colored Peppers on 1 Plant
You can enjoy Rainbow Peppers at any stage and experience all the
incredible sweet tastes of all the individual flavors. Make colorful
and flavorful meals with black, violet, yellow, orange and red
peppers.
Why pay supermarket prices when you can grow delicious peppers on
your own. Each plant can produce up to 30 peppers.
Buy 3 Rainbow Pepper plants and get 3 Big Bertha plants on us.
Learn More
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
There were these three prisoners in a German POW camp, and they were
Australian, American, and Irish.
The commandant was a real mean prick and he was going to shoot his
three
captives unless their combined dick length was in excess of 20
inches.
So the three POWs have their cocks measured and it turned out their
combined dick length was 20 inches exactly, so they were spared.
Later on the three were talking, and the Australian said "Well if it
wasn't for my 10 inch dick we'd all be dead."
The American says "Na, if it wasn't for my 8 inch dick then we'd all
be
dead."
Then the Irishman says "If I didn't have a hard on, we'd all be
dead."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Shop for Personalized Letter from the Easter Bunny.
Hand delivered by a plush 9" Easter Bunny with bendable ears, arms
and hands. Personalized with child''s first name, home address,
city and state, and a friend or family members name.
Only $19.95
Shop Now!
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A drunk comes home, stumbles into the kitchen and
prepares himself a cup of tea. He then proceeds to
carry it to the bedroom.
As he lies down next to his wife, holding the tea cup
he slurs: "Do lemons have little yellow feet?"
The wife looks at him: "No!"
"Damn!" he says, "then I squeezed the canary into my tea."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Tax Customer,
When you e-File and use direct deposit, you can get your refund in
as little as 8 days*. E-file is always free when you prepare your
tax return online with Taxbrain. Get Started Now!
Start Your Tax Return Online - Get your Refund Fast! It's as easy as
1-2-3:
1. Register and answer a brief questionnaire
2. Complete each form
3. E-File and Direct Deposit
Taxbrain.com, America's Online Tax Service looks forward to
providing you with a fast, accurate & secure filing experience.
Sincerely,
The Taxbrain Team
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1543
The Madness Cont..
Rudy: So you were a star on the team?
BJ: No, the next thing he worked on was getting me out of my shell.
He
got me to try out for the team. I made the team but as the back up
point
guard. I still had one issue, I could not shoot free throws very
well.
Sandi: How did you rectify the situation?
BJ: The next evening at the gym, he told me to shoot 100 free
throws
at the other end of the gym and not to worry about the ones I made,
but
to see where the ones I missed went...all but two missed to the
right.
A light flashed in my head, I saw the problem. I was standing
straight
on and shooting from my right side, the answer was to move a little
to my
left or to shoot in front of me. By observing, I increased my
percentage
from about fifty-five percent to eighty-five percent. I instantly
became the
second best free throw shooter on the team...if I could just play.
Rudy: Okay what happened?
BJ: We were playing a small college. We were down by twenty points
at
the half. The coach had never played me and my friend, the best
player
in the league confronted him and said, he can play, play him or I
sit.
Sandi: And?
BJ: I played...I hit my first eleven shots from the field, dished
out some
assists, played solid defense. The difference between me and the
other
point guard was night and day, I took the team and ran, ran and ran
some more. The other point guard walked it up. We attacked and the
game got down to where we were down by two points with just a few
seconds to go. There guy was shooting a one and one free throw. I
hand signaled that as soon as he released his shot, I was breaking
for our
goal... He shot, missed, we got the board, our guy made an 85 foot
long
pass, I caught it but...I was too far under our goal. The pass was
a little
too long, I did put up a shot, it hit the backboard and rim, but
missed and
we lost.
Katie: Awww!
BJ: It was okay... I was a starter from there on. Our team used to
average
about sixty points a game. The next game we scored 140 points, the
game after 104. I made first team, along with my buddy.
Rudy: Sniff sniff. So why where you hitting your head on the
wall?
BJ: My team was not attacking... I always believed in basketball,
attack
the goal on offense and attack the basketball on defense. The game
is just
that simple. Life is like that.
Rudy: Huh?
BJ: When you see what you want in life...go for it. Do not hold
back, put
forth maximum effort, if you fall short, at least you tried. If
someone tries
to mess with you (defense) defend yourself to the maximum. The best
defense is a good offense.
Katie: Do I need to write this down.
The herd in Guthrie
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
No virus found in this incoming message.
Checked by AVG.
Version: 8.0.100 / Virus Database: 269.23.21/1456 - Release Date:
5/20/2008 6:45 AM
To unsubscribe send a blank e-mail to Buffalos-adult-jokes-unsubscribe@egroups.com
Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
No comments:
Post a Comment