THE POSTMAN'S CORNER The Postman's Corner is FREE TO ALL WHO ASK FOR IT! Be sure to support our sponsors. Our sponsors make it possible  QUIT SMOKING NOW with NEW NICORETTE FRUIT CHILL Gum! FREE!!! Knock the habit once & for all with NEW NICORETTE Fruit Chill Gum – The Stop Smoking Aid bursting with great taste! Get 100 Pieces of cool fruit flavor polacrilex coated gum & reduce withdrawal symptoms starting now. http://www.thepostm  Congratulations! You've won a FREE* Sample of Slim-Fast Optima! Try Slim-Fast Optima with a free sample - on us! Click here to claim your FREE* Sample! http://www.thepostm  Family life is filled with stains and spills. Keep your family's favorites clean and fresh with New SNUGGLE Exhilarations fragrant fabric softener - FREE*! Enjoy the benefits of aromatherapy by simply doing your laundry! Exhilarate your senses with a FREE* 32 oz. bottle of SNUGGLE Exhilarations Premium Fabric Softener. With 3 scents to choose from, you can add Lift, a Twist, or a Kiss of freshness to clothes and linens! http://www.thepostm  Are you tired of your cluttered kitchen? Organizing stored food and kitchen supplies can be easier with a FREE* Sample of GladWare(R) or Ziploc(R) Plastic Containers. Participate now for your FREE* Sample of GladWare(R) or Ziploc(R) Containers. http://www.thepostm You know the other day, the phone rang and it was one of those opinion poll things. I answered the phone and you know what I said?  We do hope you enjoy today's issue! Cordially Martin aka the postman THE COMICS yes, please http://www.thepostm time to meet http://www.thepostm do something http://www.thepostm the local paper http://www.thepostm the truth http://www.thepostm  LETS GO TO THE MOVIES bathroom honesty http://www.thepostm 69 in the news http://www.thepostm a cool fountaint http://www.thepostm politicians and muppets http://www.thepostm ambulance crash http://www.thepostm so drunk he can't sit http://www.thepostm best country song http://www.thepostm crying baby http://www.thepostm "My ex was probably the dumbest man of all time." "Why do you say that?" "He came into the bedroom one night holding a jalapeno pepper in his hand. I said, 'Why in hell did you bring that pepper to the bedroom?'" "Well, what did he say?" "He said, 'You told me that we needed to spice up our love ____________ Mary was having a tough day and had stretched herself out on the couch to do a bit of what she thought to be well-deserved complaining and self-pitying. She moaned to her Mom and brother, "Nobody loves me. The whole world hates me!" Her brother, busily occupied playing a game, hardly looked up at her and passed on this encouraging word: "That's not true, Mary. Lots of people don't even know you ____________ A psychiatrist visited a California mental institution and asked a patient, "How did you get here? What was the nature of your illness?" He got the following reply. "Well, it all started when I got married and I guess I should never have done it. I married a widow with a grown daughter who then became my stepdaughter. My dad came to visit us, fell in love with my lovely stepdaughter, then married her. And so my stepdaughter was now my stepmother. Soon, my wife had a son who was, of course, my daddy's brother-in-law since he is the half-brother of my stepdaughter, who is now, of course, my daddy's wife. So, as I told you, when my stepdaughter married my daddy, she was at once my stepmother! Now, since my new son is brother to my stepmother, he also became my uncle. As you know, my wife is my step-grandmother since she is my stepmother's mother. Don't forget that my stepmother is my stepdaughter. Remember, too, that I am my wife's grandson.But hold on just a few minutes more. You see, since I'm married to my step-grandmother, I am not only the wife's grandson and her hubby, but I am also my own grandfather. Now can you understand how I got put in this place?" After staring blanky with a dizzy look on his face, the psychiatrist replied: "Move over!" ____________ The Dentist pulls out a freezing needle to give the man a shot. No way! No needles! I hate needles,' the patient said. The Dentist starts to hook up the laughing gas and the manobjects. 'I can't do the gas thing. The thought of having the gas mask onis suffocating me!' The Dentist then asks the patient if he has any objection totaking a pill. 'No objection,' the patient says. 'I'm fine with pills.' The Dentist then returns and says, 'Here's a Viagra tablet.' The patient says, 'Wow! I didn't know Viagra worked as a painkiller!! 'It doesn't,' said the Dentist, 'but it will give you somethingto hold onto when I pull your tooth.' ____________ When Peters learned that he was being fired, he went to see the head of human resources. "Since I've been with the firm for so long," he said, "I think I deserve at least a letter of recommendation. human resources director agreed and said he'd have the letter that next day. The following morning, Peters found the letter on his desk. It read, "Jonathan Peters worked for our company for eleven years. When he left us, we were very satisfied." ____________ Mechanics http://www.buffalos THAT'S ALL FOLKS Have a nice day FROM: Martin aka the postman |
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