Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
buffalo says I came across this in the archives from a couple years
back and since someone asked me about this the other day here is the
reprint.
Recipe Via Gerry
To my fellow Marines and friends. This is the original mess hall
recipe that
Marines have thrived on for 230 years (1775-2006). For you none
believers,
try it once over biscuits, hash brown spuds or toast and you think
you have
died and gone to heaven. You Marines already know how great Marine
Corps SOS
is, so print out this email because it's a keeper. For you first
timers,
when you get it ready to eat, give me a call and I'll come over and
help
judge the quality of your SOS. Good eating and Semper Fi.
Bill
SOS
1 & 1/2 LB. (24 OZS) of LEAN HAMBURGER
2 Tbsp. OLEO OR BUTTER
1 CUP CHOPPED ONION
3 Tbsp FLOUR
2 TBS. GRANULATED GARLIC
4 Tbsp SOY SAUCE
1 Tbsp. WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE
2 CUPS MILK
SALT & PEPPER TO TASTE
Brown meat, add oleo or butter and stir. Add chopped onions
and cook until they are translucent. Add flour, stir and cook for
two to three minutes. Add garlic, soy sauce, Worcestershire Sauce
and mix thoroughly. Add milk and stir until it thickens.
Bon Apetit
buffalo says throw it over some toast with a few eggs over easy on
top and one has a meal fit for a king .
Enjoy the chips...buffalo
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Chinese Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
An american tourist goes on a trip to China. While in China, he is
very sexually promiscuous and does not use a condom all the time.
A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one morning
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fix me up, doc'. The doctor answers: 'I'm sorry, there's no known
cure.
We're going to have to amputate your penis'. The man screams in
horror, 'Absolutely not! I want a second opinion'.
The doctor replies: 'Well, it's your choice. Go ahead if you want,
but surgery is your only choice'.
The next day, the man seeks out a Chinese doctor, figuring that
he'll know more about the disease..
The Chinese doctor examines his penis and proclaims: 'Ah, yes,
Mongolian VD. Vely lare disease'.
The guy says to the doctor: 'Yeah, yeah, I already know that!, but
what we can do? My American doctor wants to operate and amputate my
penis?'
What, cut you dick off !!! The Chinese doctor shakes his head and
laughs: 'Stupid Amelican docta, always want to opelate. Make more
money, that way. No need to opelate!'
'Oh, Thank God!', the man replies.
'Yes', says the Chinese doctor, 'You no worry! Wait two weeks, fall
off by itself!'
Randy
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Hummer Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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He turns to the saleslady and asks, "Where do I pick up my keys to
that new truck?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Ho Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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All "Ho-downs" will be terminated as a racist affront to
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The phrases "Heave-Ho," "Gung Ho," and "Tally Ho!" will be expunged
from the English language.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Little Johnny Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Little Johnny went to the first day of kindergarten and sat down.
His teacher went around the room and was asking every boy and girl
his or her name.
When she got to Johnny he said, "My name is Little Johnny, but they
call me 'Bonnie' and that pisses me off."
Sensing some anger she said to Little Johnny, "This is kindergarten
Johnny, we don't talk like that." Then she went around and asked
everyone his or her address.
When she got to Little Johnny he said, "I live on Third Street but
they call it 'Terd Street' and that really pisses me off."
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The teacher says, "You seem like a smart little boy can you tell me
what this means?" Then she pulls up her dress.
He says, "Of course I can. That means you wanna diddle and I'm too
little and that really pisses me off."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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666 Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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666 F = Oven temperature for roast Beast
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666MHz = CPU of the Beast
666i = BMW of the Beast
668 = Next-door neighbor of the Beast
666A, 666B = Tenants of the beast
999 = Sign of the Australian Beast
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Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Nina, a rather young miss attending St. Mary's Catholic Girls
School,
was sitting on the sidewalk, smoking a cigarette.
The local priest walks by and gives her a glare. "Nina! Smoking at
such a young age! Aren't you ashamed?"
"What?" said Nina. "You got something better to do after sex?"
John: Would you tell me your sexual fantasies, Jill?
Jill: Well, yes, but I'm afraid you'd find them monotonous.
John: Why do you think so?
Jill: You're in all of them!
The doctor was surprised to find old Mr. Jones sitting on the bed
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over to the nurse who was taking his vitals.
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that?"
The nurse replied, "I told him that you were going to want to
examine
his sexual organs."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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LynnLynn's Links
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Why Women Hate Sports
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jill: C'mon, Mary, exactly how many men have you been with?
Mary: Now, Jill, I've taken the Army's policy on that information
and
adapted it for my own situation.
Jill: What do you mean?
Mary: Don't ask; don't tell; don't remember.
Rosey: I just found out why cunnilingus is called eating while
fellatio is a blow job.
Nina: Why is that Rosey?
Rosey: The terms were invented by a woman to make the one sound
enjoyable and the other like work.
Rosey and Nina were sitting together sharing their morning coffee.
Rosey said to Nina, "Living with my husband is like playing
checkers."
"How so?" asks Nina.
Rosey replies, "Every time I make a move, he jumps me."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Toon Chips
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Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
An epileptic young woman named Camp
Was seduced on her couch by a tramp
But the first time he squeezed her
She had a Grand seizure
And broke both his balls and a lamp.
With increasingly throbbing delight
Your caresses will set me alight;
And I'll soon reach the peak,
That I eagerly seek...
Then I'll snore for the rest of the night.
There was a young lady named Riddle
Who had an untouchable middle.
She had many friends
Because of her ends,
Since it isn't the middle you diddle.
Yer Hillbilly friend in TN... Ross
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Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Barack Obama got out of the shower and was drying off when he looked
in the mirror and noticed he was white from the neck up to the top
of his head.
In sheer panic and fearing he was turning white and might have to
start working for a living, he called his doctor and told him of his
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Barack drank the concoction and replied, 'That tasted like
bullshit!'
The doctor replied, 'It was, you were a quart low.'
Randy
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Bonus Chip
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I ran into Jim at work yesterday. He had been out for
a few days with the flu. I asked him how he was feeling.
"I'm better, thanks. You know, it was a wonderful
experience."
"Wonderful? How can the flu be wonderful?" I asked in
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"Well, I learned that my wife really loves me. You know
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I could hear her excitedly saying 'My husband is home!
My husband is home!"
Randy
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1425
Action, Camera...
Producer: Okay Diana, I want you to sit behind the organ and
pretend
to play. BJ you sit in the front pew with your white dog, he will
be your
seeing eye dog.
Katie grumbling: I could have done that...
Sandi: Hush, there might be something for us to do yet.
Producer looking around...: Okay ... no not okay. I need something
else.
Let's see this is an old country church... we need an old flea
bitten dog,
a real mangy skinny thing. You, the red dog come here.
Katie: Hrumpt, me a flea-bitten dog, well I never. But it is my
chance to
act...
Producer: I want you to lay in the aisle and look sad and
miserable,
pathetic kind of how you look now.
Katie: Well, I never....
Katie strolls over to the aisle and with much ado... lays down in
the aisle.
Producer: Okay... Camera, Action...!
The scene starts to play ... Diana pretends to play the organ while
the
music is being pumped from speakers. Rudy is sitting next to blind
BJ
while Katie is laying in the aisle looking bedraggled.
Producer: Cut! That's it! I need a new hero.. a hero that is
strong and
yet innocent. You, the dog on the side.
Sandi: Me?
Producer: Yes, you. You will come in and save poor Timothy at the
last
minute when all is doomed.
Sandi: Woof!
To be continued
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
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