THE POSTMAN'S CORNER Happiness comes through doors you didn't even know you left open.  You can make as much as $100/hour without leaving your couch! Click here to get the scoop! http://www.thepostm  You ready for kickoff? How about tickets to go see your favorite pro football team! A $500 Value â€" Yours FREE! Are You Ready for Some Football? Participate in our Football Promotion and you’ll get FREE Pro Football Tickets! A $500 Value! Don't miss any of the exciting action! Show your team spirit and catch the games LIVE in the stadium! http://www.thepostm FROM: THE INVESTIGATIVE REPORTS BUREAU OF THE POSTMAN'S CORNER Barack Obama continues to criticise John McCaine's economic policies, stating that he does not understand the economy. In reply, the McCaine campaign said they would like to criticise Obama's policy. Unfortunately, however, no one knows what it is yet. The election campaign rumbles on. November seems to be a long ways away. In the last few weeks the polls seem to suggest that Governor Palin has done a remarkable job in solidifying and energizing the GOP. The publishers are asking the postman fans what they think of the governor. Please do me a favor and let them know what you think of Sarah. It won't cost you anything and I will receive a little credit to help continue in publishing The Postman's Corner. Please be sure to vote, lets make sure that the publishers hear our voice! Its a short survey, and you could receive a 500 $$ visa card!  We want to know if you think she has the right stuff. Tell us. http://www.thepostm We do hope you enjoy today's issue! Cordially Martin aka the postman THE COMICS takin a poll http://www.thepostm getting to know you http://www.thepostm the three rs http://www.thepostm hunting trip- http://www.thepostm the muppets and politics http://www.thepostm never squash a can of wd-40 http://www.thepostm the kidnapping http://www.thepostm
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Sheila and George were spending the first night of their honeymoon in a quaint medieval town in France. To add piquancy to the evening, Sheila suggested coyly that they make love every time the old night watchman rang his hourly bell. George smiled in delight at this prospect, but four rings later he pretended that he had to go out to get some cigarettes and staggered off to the watchman's tower. "Listen, old man," he wheezed to that worthy, "do me a favor, will you? For the rest of the night, ring that bell of yours at two-hour intervals instead of hourly!" "Ah," replied the ancient watchman, fingering his mustache, "I would be happy to oblige, monsieur, but I cannot do this." "Why not?" George demanded. "I'll give you money, if that's what's troubling you!" "Not at all," the old man responded. "You see, a beautiful young lady has already bribed me to ring the bell every half hour." ____________ Q: What would happen if you swallowed a frog? A: You might croak. Q: Why shouldn't you feed your teddy bear? A: He is already stuffed. Q: Why couldn't the fans get soda pop at the double-header? A: Because the home team lost the opener. ____________ A dinner speaker was in such a hurry to get to his engagement that when he arrived and sat down at the head table, he suddenly realized that he had forgotten his false teeth. Turning to the man next to him he said, "I forgot my teeth!" The man said, "No problem." With that he reached into his pocket and pulled out a pair of false teeth. "Try these," he said. The speaker tried them. "Thanks, but they're too loose," he said. The man then said, "I have another pair...try these." The speaker tried them and responded, "Too tight." The man was not taken back at all. He then said, "I have one more pair... try them." The speaker said, "They fit perfectly!" With that he ate his meal and gave his address. After the dinner meeting was over, the speaker went over to thank the man who had helped him. "I want to thank you for coming to my aid. Where is your office? I've been looking for a good dentist." The man replied, "Oh I'm not a dentist. I work at the morgue.." ____________ An old widow and widower named Mary and Steve get married. They are up there in age, and the romance, engagement and marriage was quick. They hoped they had enough strength to live through their wedding day and night. After the marriage ceremony, they retire to a nearby hotel. Both are very nervous. Cautiously they begin to undress in front of each other. In the process, Mary, the old woman, removes her false teeth and puts them in a glass. Mary then removes her prosthetic leg and leans it against the wall. She looks up at her new groom and smiles nervously, and Steve is intently watching... Mary continues. She removes her bra which contains false inserts; she removes a glass eye and gingerly places it in a special box on the nightstand. Again she shyly smiles at her aged spouse, and Steve continues to stare in an interested manner. As Mary takes off her wig, she realizes that Steve is not making much progress in getting undressed. He's stopped undressing and is just staring at her. She asks him, "What are you waiting for?" Steve quickly replies, "You know what I want. Take it off and throw it over here!" ____________ Dog Tattoo http://buffalosjoke Ideal Partner http://buffalosjoke Fun pages from Lorraine Flatulent Marilyn Monroe http://tinyurl. Message From God http://tinyurl. The Greatest Escape http://tinyurl. These Babes are Tough http://tinyurl. That's all folks! Have a nice day FROM: Martin aka the postman |
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