THE POSTMAN'S CORNER Teaching kids to count is fine, but teaching them what counts is best Be sure to suppport our sponsors! They keep THE POSTMAN'S CORNER free to all who ask for it!  Get the school supplies and fashions you need with a FREE $500 Back-to-School Gift Card! Didn't quite get everything you needed in time for school? No worries, complete your Back-2-School shopping with a FREE $500 Back-to-School Gift Card to Sears, JC Penney or Kmart! Choose your favorite store and get everything you didn’t get before!! Act Now - and the $500 Gift Card is yours - FREE http://www.thepostm  FREE* PRINGLES APLENTY! >>Click Here to Stock up On Your Favorite Flavor - FREE*!<< If once you pop you can't stop, don't worry! Get a Value Size 14-Pack OF PRINGLES - FREE*! Barbeque, Ranch Rageous, Pizzalicious & more. Go ahead, pop the top on your favorite flavor! Get YOUR Personal Favorite! -Barbeque -Cheezums -Original -Pizzalicious -Ranch-Rageous -Reduced Fat Original -Salt & Vinegar -Sour Cream & Onion -White Cheddar http://www.thepostm  CHEERIOS - FREE* SAMPLE! It's the Cheerio Challenge! Vote for your favorite flavor Cheerios and get 2 BOXES FREE*. http://www.thepostm  NESTLE Pure Life. Pure Water for Your Pure Satisfaction! If you've got a thirst for life, get a taste of NESTLE PURE LIFE water. NESTLE Pure Life gives you refreshing, purified water enhanced with a unique balance of minerals. It's the refined, crisp-tasting bottled water than only NESTLE brand can bring you! Get your FREE* 24-Pack of NESTLE Pure Life Water now while suplies last. http://www.thepostm FROM: THE INVESTIGATIVE REPORTS BUREAU OF THE POSTMAN'S CORNER In order to make good on his promise of no new taxes, Presidential nominee Jon Mccain was asked today how he planned to continue the war on terror. The republican candidate unveiled a new financing program he said would eliminate the need for new taxes, fund the war on terror, and ultimately be instrumental in the capture of Osama. He says he will plan to market a new back yard toy to Americans and every one will buy one and the proceeds can be used for the funding, rather than taxes.  In other news today, the governor of Texas proposed a new way of initiating border security. He says this will be far more effective than anything else attempted up to this point.  We do hope you enjoy today's issue! Cordially Martin aka the postman THE COMICS thats mine http://www.thepostm what the experts say http://www.thepostm the hunters bar http://www.thepostm wishful thinking http://www.thepostm thats a good excuse http://www.thepostm a bad dream http://www.thepostm the lost and found http://www.thepostm a cell phone http://www.thepostm don't worry http://www.thepostm LETS GO TO THE MOVIES Rudolph the rednosed raindeer http://www.thepostm the skating cowboys http://www.thepostm postman's revenge http://www.thepostm home from church http://www.thepostm POWER POINT DISPLAYS cartoon classics-power point display http://www.thepostm rumor-power point display http://www.thepostm can't eat-power point display http://www.thepostm a land far away-power point display http://www.thepostm I was addressing some mail when I noticed that my card file of frequently used addresses was missing. Thinking it must have fallen from my typing table into the wastebasket, I called the office janitor. "I've lost my Rolodex," I told him. "It may have been picked up with the trash. Is there any way you could find it?" He said he would conduct a search. When the janitor informed me he had searched every trash container for my Rolodex, with no luck, I thanked him for his trouble.As I left work that evening, the janitor met me at the door. "Good night," he said smiling apologetically. "Sorry I couldn't find your watch." ____________ One morning a man came into the church on crutches. He stopped in front of the holy water, put some on both legs, and then threw away his crutches. An alter boy witnessed the scene and then ran into the rectory to tell the priest what he'd just seen."Son, you've just witnessed a miracle," the priest said. "Tell me where is this man now?" "Flat on his ass over by the holy water," said the boy. ____________ He didn't like the casserole And he didn't like my cake. He said my biscuits were too hard, Not like his mother used to make. I didn't perk the coffee right. He didn't like the stew. I didn't mend his socks the way his mother used to do. I pondered for an answer I was looking for a clue. Then I turned around & smacked the **** out of him... Like his mother used to do. ____________ A young wife, who was becoming frustrated with her young husbands constant demands for sex, decides to make a schedule for him, to cut down on the amount of times that they will have to make love for the rest of their marriage. While getting ready for work, she writes on a piece of paper, "Honey, you know I love you, but your never ending requests for sex are leaving me drained and really tired. So I propose that we only have sex on days that start with the letter 'T', to minimise the frequency of our lovemaking sessions. Don't be mad at me honey, just understand where I am coming from, and let me know if my request is too demanding of you." On her way out the door, she uses a refrigerator magnet and sticks the note to the fridge door, hoping that her sex craved husband will be understanding and accepting of her proposal when he reads it. Upon returning home, she glances at the refrigerator and notices that her note has been replaced with a note from her husband that reads, "Baby, I didn't' realise that I was putting you under so much pressure and I'm sorry. I accept your proposal and have even taken the extra step of listing at the bottom of this letter, those days starting with the letter 'T' to make sure that we are on the same page. 1. TUESDAY 2. THURSDAY 3. TODAY 4. TOMORROW P.S. I love you too, and remember it's still TODAY, I am waiting for you upstairs." ____________ Soon after the Texas Aggie clocked in for work, the foreman called him over and told him that he had a phone call in the front office. When the Aggie returned, he had a mournful expression on his face and his head hung low. His foreman noticed and asked if he had received bad news. "Shure was Boss" he replied, "I just found out that my mother died earlier this morning. "Gosh, thats awful," replied the foreman "Do you want the rest of the day off?" "No," replied the Aggie. "I'll finish the day out." About an hour later, the foreman returned to inform him that there was another phone call for him up front. This time when the Aggie returned he looked twice as glum and the foreman asked if everything was alright. "Jeez, Boss this has to be the worst day of my life," moaned the Aggie. "That was my brother, and his mother died today too!" ____________ Buffalo Bill First X-Movie http://www.buffalos Hate Black Men http://www.buffalos PAPA THORN Want A Little Head? http://able2laugh. THAT'S ALL FOLKS! Have a nice day FROM: Martin aka the postman |
*To visit your group "PostmansCorner" on the web.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/PostmansCorner
or http://www.thepostmanscorner.net
*To unsubscribe from this group, send a blank email to:
PostmansCorner-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
*To subscribe to this group, send a blank email to:
PostmansCorner-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
*PLZ NOTE: DO NOT send unsubscribe requests to the listowner
(Follow instructions)
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/PostmansCorner
or http://www.thepostmanscorner.net
*To unsubscribe from this group, send a blank email to:
PostmansCorner-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
*To subscribe to this group, send a blank email to:
PostmansCorner-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
*PLZ NOTE: DO NOT send unsubscribe requests to the listowner
(Follow instructions)
Change settings via the Web (Yahoo! ID required)
Change settings via email: Switch delivery to Daily Digest | Switch format to Traditional
Visit Your Group | Yahoo! Groups Terms of Use | Unsubscribe
.
__,_._,___
No comments:
Post a Comment