THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
"The price of apathy towards public affairs
is to be ruled by evil men." Plato
BEST BUY
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GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
COMEDIAN SUED OVER MOTHER IN LAW JOKES
LOS ANGELES – "Take my mother-in-law — please,"
isn't a joke you're likely to hear often these days
from Sunda Croonquist. The veteran comic is being sued by
her mother-in-law after making her the punchline of too many jokes.
The mother-in-law is accusing Croonquist of spreading false,
defamatory and racist lies with in-law jokes that have become
a staple of her routine in nightclubs and on
television channels like Comedy Central.
I'm wondering, do you think I should stop calling the wife
"the war department?" maybe she might SUE me for it?
I'm not certain of that, she is kindof mellow. But, if I
continue to call her that, I wonder: Sooner or later will
I go to my mailbox to find a bill from some misguided
government contractor? perhaps very possible ...
after all, she is "THE WAR DEPARTMENT"
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
THE COMICS
bad throw Billy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q030.html
before sex
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q031.html
clever of you
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q032.html
looking back on it
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q033.html
ever notice
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q034.html
I met a girl
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q035.html
losing weight
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q036.html
the nerve
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/q037.html
_____________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
stupid commercial
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies6083.html
the band concert Mickey mouse 1935
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies6084.html
smart car
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies6085.html
mens undies
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies6086.html
breaking news
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies6087.html
banned diet coke commercial
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies6088.html
_______________
Three guys were sitting around in a bar discussing whose wife was
the most frigid. Harry was definitely sure he had the worst of it.
"Listen, you guys," he said, "my wife comes to bed with an ice cube
in each hand, and in the morning they haven't begun to melt."
"That's nothing," said Phil. "My wife likes to have a glass of
water on the bedside table, but by the time she's carried it from
the bathroom to the bedroom, it's frozen solid."
"Aw, hell," said Herb, "my wife is so frigid that when she spreads
her legs, the furnace kicks on."
_________________
A priest was being honored at his retirement dinner after 25
years in the parish. A leading local politician and member of
the congregation was chosen to make the presentation and give
a little speech at the dinner.
He was delayed, so the priest decided to say his own few words
while they waited. "I got my first impression of the parish
from the first confession I heard here. I thought I had been
assigned to a terrible place. The very first person to enter
my confessional told me he had stolen a television set and,
when questioned by the police, was able to lie his way out of
it. He had stolen money from his parents, embezzled from his
employer, had an affair with his boss' wife, taken illegal
drugs and pickled his liver with drink.
I was appalled. But as the days went on I knew that my people
were not all like that and I had, indeed, come to a fine
parish full of good and loving people."
Just as the priest finished his talk, the politician arrived
full of apologies at being late. He immediately began to make
the presentation and gave his talk. "I'll never forget the
first day our parish priest arrived," said the politician.
"In fact, I had the honor of being the first one to go to him
in confession."
_______________
There is a guy who has a dog that doesn't obey him.
Then he sees an ad in the paper for a great dog trainer.
So, he decides to go to the dog trainer and get his dog trained.
The guy walks in the room and asks,
"Can you train my dog, and are you a good trainer?"
The trainer replies, "Well, I can train your dog,
and I will give you a demonstration of how good I am."
He dumped a box full of bones on the floor and blew a whistle.
The first dog came in and made a skeleton with the bones.
"Wow!" said the guy, "What kind of dog is that?"
"That's a nurse's dog," said the trainer.
Then he blows the whistle again and a second dog comes
in the room. That dog makes a big building. The man says,
"Wow! What kind of dog is that?" "That's an architect's
dog," replies the trainer. Then the trainer blows the
whistle again and a third dog comes in. That dog takes
the bones, screws the other two dogs and runs away.
"Wow! What kind of dog is that?" says the man.
"That's a lawyer's dog!"
_________________
A Scotsman, who was planning a trip to the Holy
Land, was aghast when he found it would cost
fifty dollars an hour to rent a boat on the Sea
of Galilee. "Hoot mon," he said, "in Scotland it
wouldna ha been more than $20."
"That might be true," said the travel agent, "but
you have to take into account that the Sea of
Galilee is water on which our Lord himself
walked.""Well, at $50/hour for a boat," said the Scotsman,
"it's no wonder he walked."
_________________
My wife caught a Peeping Tom last night, and
she'd have killed him if we hadn't stopped her."
"He must have made her very angry, peeking at her, huh?"
"No, that's not what made her the maddest."
"It's not?"
"No, she got mad when he reached in the window and closed the curtains."
__________________
FUN PAGES from Lorraine
Boxhead Zombie Wars
http://tinyurl.com/d5xh43
Wonderburg
http://tinyurl.com/pq4j2x
Fire Proof Tree
http://tinyurl.com/cd4w9l
_____________
BUFFALO BILL
Blonde Arm Wrestling
http://www.buffaloschips.com/012808.htm
Blonde That Started It All
http://www.buffaloschips.com/012809.htm
Boy And His Train
http://www.buffaloschips.com/012810.htm
__________
SYDESJOKES LIST
Aggressive Salesman
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/toon1/000058.html
THAT'S ALL FOLKS
have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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