Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
Looks like we are in for about 5 days of +80 degree weather
and the humidity is supposed to go higher tomorrow. People
from downstate are coming north because it is still 15 degrees
cooler and drier. Someone had an ad in the paper for a portable
air conditioner online today for 175.00 until midnight and then the
price went to 225.00, talk about taking advantage of the forecast.
If it got that bad I would go sit in the food court at Wal-mart and
drink coffee till the sun goes down. Temperature drops to the
mid sixties fast after that.
Nancy is at the hospital today. They discovered a mass in one of her
kidneys that will have to be removed and is spending the day in
Radiology
and Nuclear Medicine finding out what else is affected. Your
thoughts and prayers for a positive outcome would be appreciated.
Enjoy the chips and have a good weekend... buffalo
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Condom Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
One day this old man was about to have sex with an eighteen-year-
girl, who he did not know. The old man began to put on his condom
when the young girl asked him why is he putting one on.
She said "you don't have to worry about getting me pregnant because
you are too old and you don't have to worry about catching anything
because you are going to die pretty soon anyway".
The old man continued to put on his condom he then looked up at the
girl and said, "young girl the reason I am putting on this condom
isn't because I am afraid of getting you pregnant or catching
anything. I just like the scent of burning rubber."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
I'm worried
http://www.thepostm
pizza online
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only the dog knows for sure
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Chinese
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Chinese Translations
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Choc-condoms
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Beer Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Handful of 7 YR. OLD CHILDREN were asked
'What they thought of beer.'
Some interesting responses:
"I think beer must be good. My dad says the more beer he drinks the
prettier my Mom gets."
--Tim, 7 years old
'Beer makes my dad sleepy and we get to watch what we want on
television when he is asleep, so beer is nice.'
--Mellanie, 7 years old
"My Mom and Dad both like beer. My Mom gets funny when she drinks
it and takes her top off at parties, but Dad doesn't think this is
very funny."
--Grady, 7 years old
''My Mom and Dad talk funny when they drink beer and the more they
drink the more they give kisses to each other, which is a good
thing.'
--Toby, 7 years old
"My Dad gets funny on beer. He is funny. He also wets his pants
sometimes, so he shouldn't have too much.
--Sarah, 7 years old
"My Dad loves beer. The more he drinks, the better he dances. One
time he danced right into the pool
--Lilly, 7 years old
"I don't like beer very much. Every time Dad drinks it, he burns
the sausages on the barbecue and they taste disgusting."
--Ethan, 7 years old
"I give Dad's beer to the dog and he goes to sleep.'
--Shirley, 7 years old
"My Mom drinks beer and she says silly things and picks on my
father. Whenever she drinks beer she yells at Dad and tells him to
go bury his bone down the street again, but that doesn't make any
sense."
--Jack, 7 years old
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Computer Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Signs that you may need to exorcise your PC
1. Sign of the Beast: That creepy Damian guy in the IT department
just downgraded you to a Pentium-666.
2. Stand Back: When you eject your CD, green pea soup comes flying
out the drive door.
3. Dangerous Game: Names of your MS Hearts opponents mysteriously
change from Pauline, Michele, and Ben to Beelzebub, Lucifer, and Old
Scratch.
4. Here's Johnny: You try to print out a spreadsheet, but all you
get is ten pages of "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy."
5. X-Rays Don't Lie: When your laptop goes through airport
security, the machine picks up an outline of a cloven hoof.
6. New Screensaver: Flying pentacles.
7. Possession Is Nine-Tenths of the Law: Your computer monitor
swivels a full 360 degrees every time you walk into the room.
8. Freedom of Speech: Your voice recognition software starts
speaking in tongues.
9. Blair Witch Redux: You find a fresh stack of crossed sticks by
your CPU.
10. Gates of Hell: Your PC runs Windows without an error. A sure
sign of possession.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Random Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Never moon the audience while suffering from projectile diarrhea -
that's when the shit hits the fan.
Michael had a blind date with Sandra for the prom and, as the
evening
progressed, he found himself attracted to her more and more. After
some really passionate embracing, he said,"Tell me, do you object to
making love?" "That is something I have never done before," Sandra
replied. "Never made love? You mean you are a virgin?" Michael was
amazed. "No, silly!" she giggled. "Never objected!"
The prostitute who was into bondage was strapped for cash.
Jack was to be married to Jill, so his father sat him down for a
fireside chat. "Jack," he says, "Let me tell you something. On my
wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my trousers, handed
them to your mother and said 'Here Honey, try these on'. So she did,
and said 'Well sweetie, they're a little too big, I can't wear them'
so I replied 'Exactly. I wear the trousers in this family, and I
always will'. Ever since that night we have never had any problems."
"Hmmm," says Jack, and thinks it's a good thing to try. So, on his
honeymoon Jack takes off his trousers and says to Jill, "Here Babe,
try these on". So she does and says, "These are too large, they
don't
fit me". Jack then says, "Exactly. I wear the trousers in this
relationship, I always will, and I don't want you to forget that".
At
this, Jill takes off her knickers, hands them to Jack and says,
"Here,
you try on mine". So he tries and says, "I can't even get into your
knickers". Jill says, "Exactly. And if you don't change your fucking
attitude, you never will!"
Stan Kegel
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Spanish Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hey I learned some new Spanish words today and I feel a lot better.
Actually I was told that I was an asshole because I hadn't learned a
second language. So now I am a bilingual buffalo and I can cuss
people out in two languages. I am so proud of myself I may learn
how to piss off the whole freaking United Nations.
Cabron! Bastard
Cabrone Bastard
Cago en tu leche I shit in your milk.
Capullo / gilipollas Asshole
Chinco To mama Suck Your mom's Boobs
Chinga Tu Madre Fuck your mother
Chingas tu madre Fuck your mom
Chupa me, puto Suck me, asshole!
Chupa mi verga Suck my dick
Chupame la pija blow me
Co?o! Damn!, Fuck!, Shit!
Culero Asshole
De Puta Madre is the shit(good)
Hijo de puta! You son of a bitch!
Huevos! Fuck off
Joder! fuck!
Lam?me el orto Lick my ass
Ma Pinga! My Dick!
Mama Webo Suck my dick
Mariposa Homosexual
Marricon faggot
Mierda Shit
Mierde Shit
No me jodas! Don't fuck with me!
Pajero Wanker
Panocha Pussy (Mex)
Pinga (Cuban slang) Penis
Punta por vavor Bitch please...
Puto Faggot (Mex)
Soplanucas neck blower
Su madre come mierda your mum eats shit
balurde something shitty
beso mi culo kiss my ass
boludo (Argentina) idiot, stupid
bruja bitch
cachimba vagina
cara de cona cunt face
chichis breasts
chingar to fuck
chorizo dick (lit. sausage)
chupa me la peha suck my dick
chupame la turca suck the dick
chupar to suck
cochina disgusting person (f)
cochino disgusting person (m)
cojer fuck
cojones balls, testicles,
come mierda eat shit
concha (Argentina) pussy
conchetumare Motherfucker
forro/a (Argentina) asshole, dickhead
hacete cojer go and get fucked
hijo de puta son of a bitch
joto faggot (mex.)
la cage I fucked up
ladron de mierda muthafucking thief
lela dummy
malparida slut
mamahuevo cock sucker
ojala que mueras i hope you die
pelotudo (Argentina) idiot, stupid
pendeja, pendejo (Lit. pubic hair)
pendejo short curly ass hair
perra bitch
pija dick
pinche fucking (sp)
pinche puta Fuckin whore
piruja whore,slut.
poronga dick
puta whore
quiete lo cico Shut the fuck up
te odio i hate you
tu madre your mom
zopupla slut
zorra whore
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The pair had just met at the carnival. In a casual sort of way, the
fellow asked the girl what plans she had for the rest of the
evening.
"Well," she replied candidly, "I'm going to find a handsome guy and
invite him up to my apartment." "Yes" "I'll make him nice and
comfortable, then mix him a drink." "Uh huh" "Then I'll turn the
lights down low, shut the blinds and lock the front door." "Go on."
"And then, when the right moment comes I'll let him take me in his
arms and make passionate love to me. Well, What do you think of the
idea?" Smiled the fellow, "It sounds like a great idea, if you ask
me."
During a lull in the rehearsal the groom and best man, two long time
friends and playboys, began to compare conquests. The groom, looking
out over the crowd, said to his best man, "You know Bill, except for
my wife to be, my two sisters and my mother, I've made love to every
woman in this room." To which his friend responded, "Well then,
between the two of us we've had them all!"
Mrs. Grednick, who was a little on the chubby side, was at her
weight-
watchers meeting. "My husband insists I come to these meetings
because
he would rather have sex with a woman who has a trim figure," she
lamented to the woman next to her. "Well," the lady replied, "What's
wrong with that you'll feel better, too." "You don't understand. He
likes to do it while I'm stuck at these damn meetings."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/To Hear You Lord
http://www.silveran
Marlene/Way Up On The Mountain/ New Gospel
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~Vaya con Dios~ Les Paul & Mary Ford
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"Summer Fun"
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Surfin Surfari
Extreme Chocolate Via Dianne
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1001 Free Flash Games Via Wesley
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Easter Island - A History Via Wesley
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RAILROAD HISTORY and EARLY LOCOMOTIVE DEVELOPMENT
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Javascript Tutorial
http://www.pagereso
FTP Tutorial
http://www.pagereso
Yahoo Trip Planner Via Wesley
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*+*+*+*+*+*+
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Animal World
Doggie Zone
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Kitty Korner
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Movie Clips
Mouse in Her Bra
http://www.buffalos
Movie
http://www.buffalos
Movie 1
http://www.buffalos
High Fireman
http://www.buffalos
Milt Show
http://www.buffalos
Lucky 2
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Lucky 3
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Lucky 4
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Magic 1320
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Magic Food
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
There was a young gigolo named Bruno
Who said, "Screwing's one thing I do know.
While women are fine,
And sheep are divine,
Lama's are numero uno!"
There was a lady from Kent
To a football game she went
She stood near the goal
And opened her hole
And in the football went!
A transvestite from Lyford-By-Tyme
When charged with a terrible crime.
Said, "Your honor, Oh No!
It cannot be so,
For I was a broad at the time."
(Norman Gilbert)
<Snagged by>
Ross
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
archie
http://www.buffalos
area
http://www.buffalos
army's slogan
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army
http://www.buffalos
Arnold
http://www.buffalos
art
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
THE LEGEND LIVES ON
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Navy Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two Retired Marines in San Diego were sitting down for a break in
their soon-to-be new store. As yet, the store wasn't ready yet,
with only a few shelves set up. One said to the other, 'I bet any
minute now some idiot sailor is going to walk by, put his face to
the window, and ask what we're selling.' No sooner were the words
out of his mouth when, sure enough, a crusty old Retired Navy Chief
walked to the window, had a peek, and in a thick salty accent asked,
"What the #*/@ are you selling in here?"
One of the Marines replied sarcastically, "we're selling assholes"
Without skipping a beat, the Old Chief said, "You're doin' well
then...
only two left!"
Marines, God bless them, should not mess with a Navy Chief.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A guy walks into a pub to meet his mates for a beer. They are amazed
at how healthy he is looking. In particular he has fantastically
good-
looking smooth skin on his face with a totally radiant glow. "Jim
you
are looking fit and healthy. Started a new diet?" "Nope," says Jim.
"So, you've joined a fitness club then?" "Nope," says Jim. "But your
face looks so fresh and healthy. Let us in on the secret Jim. What
are
you doing?" "I've got a new girl friend," says Jim. "But how does
that
get you healthy looking smooth skin on your face?" "Well" says Jim
"my
new girl friend has got the hairiest pussy I've every seen. In fact
she's like a wire brush down there!" "So?" says the inquisitive
friend. "So, going down on her is the quickest way I know to
exfoliate
and moisturize your face at the same time!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was happy hour in the bar, and the air hung heavy in thick blue
folds as the regular bunch lit up some "happy weed."
Suddenly, a loud voice boomed from the entrance and demanded that
they open the door in the name of legality.
The smokers frantically gathered their still-smoking weeds and
stuffed them inside the cuckoo clock.
The police entered, searched diligently, found nothing and left.
The group breathed a sigh of relief, and made for the cuckoo clock
to retrieve their stash.
Just then, the clock's hands announced 6 pm. The little door popped
open, the bird poked his head out and said, "Heyyyy duuuudes! What
the fuck time is it?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1668
Katherine Is All You Need to Know
BJ: I cannot believe Katie went all the way to the groomers. That
is
about a mile or more away.
Sandi: Like I said, she must have wanted her hair done.
BJ: Nonsense, there is something else going on.
Anyone want to go with me?
Rudy: I will. I am curious to see how she explains her way out of
this
one.
Sandi: Err, I guess, I will go to.
BJ: Gasp! You want to ride in the car?
Sandi: If I can ride in the front seat.
BJ: Okay.
Everyone piles in the car. BJ is wearing his pjs. He grabs a leash
before
he leaves the house.
This is an odd sight. Rudy is sitting up in the back seat, Sandi is
sitting
up in the passenger seat while BJ is driving. Other cars when they
drive by take a double look at the car and it's occupants.
In a few minutes they arrive at the groomer's house. BJ gets out
and
goes behind the house to the groomer's business where the kennels
are.
There is Miss Katherine ready to come home. BJ attaches the leash
and....
Katie: It wasn't my fault. Our neighbor was walking to the gas
station.
I thought he needed some company, and I did not know the gas station
was so far away and the next thing I saw was the groomer's house and
I was scared and lost and...
BJ: It's okay, I saw the neighbor walking home and figured you
probably walked with him.
Katie: Sniff sniff, I will never do that again.
BJ: Don't make promises you cannot keep.
The Herd in Guthrie
(Pretty much how it happened. I visited with Kate and told her not
to run off so far from home, she could get hit by a car, get picked
up)
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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