THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
Fortunate are those who find
some good in which they can act
as a man for other men. Their own
humanity will be enriched.
~Albert Schweitzer
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GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Yesterday, "the war department" had the day off.
She declared it to be another "cleaning day".
I promptly responded by declaring how that would
be sacrilidge. Yeah, almost blasphemous on such
a sacred day as this. Scratching her head a second,
I knew I had at least caught her attention,
which is pretty remarkable when she is hell bent
on the cleaning thing. "what is so important about
today?" she asked. "Dear, don't tell me, you don't know what
today is!!!" I declared with shock. She says, "NO.
Should I?" "Its the 40th anniversary of Woodstock!
And you expect me to clean???" I stated this with
as much shock on my face and with as much
incredulousness in my voice as I could muster.
"We should be sitting around grooving to the tunes
of Joe Cocker, Joan Baez, Jimi
Hindrix and Janis Joplin, and...."
She interrupted my reverie by explaining that she
had sold all of my old 8 track tapes last year at
the garage sale when the 8 track player quit working.
"Dear," she says in a very serious tone of voice.
"You was 12 years old when Woodstock happened.
You know what that means?" "What dear" says I.
"You missed out back then, but you ain't gonna miss
out today. Get your butt over to the closet and get
the vacuum."
Sigh. sometimes its rough being an
old hippy. ya know? :)
We do hope you enjoy today's issue
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
THE COMICS
what kind of friend
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n080.html
you know your in trouble when...
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n081.html
sockular regeneration
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n082.html
my boss
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n083.html
remind me
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n084.html
redneck sos
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n085.html
cash for clunkers
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n086.html
balls
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n087.html
whats this?
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/n088.html
______________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
a ride in a U2 spy plane
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies6021.html
Bill Gates retires
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies6022.html
health care reform...one man's opinion/Congressman Mike Rogers
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies6023.html
a shopping cart
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies6024.html
thats gotta hurt
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies6025.html
American idol jerk
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies6026.html
A minister gave a talk to the Lions Club on sex.
When he got home, he couldn't tell his wife that
he had spoken on sex, so he said he had discussed
horseback riding with the members.
A few days later, she ran into some men at the
shopping center and they complimented her on the
speech her husband had made.
She said, "Yes, I heard. I was surprised about the
subject matter, as he's only tried it twice. The first
time he got so sore he could hardly walk,
and the second time he fell off."
_____________
A class professor was giving a lecture on company slogans
and was asking his students if they were familiar with them.
"Joe," he asked, "which company has the slogan,
'come fly the friendly skies'?"
Joe answered the correct airline.
"Brenda, can you tell me which company has the slogan,
"Don't leave home without it?"
Brenda answered the correct credit card company with no difficulty.
"Now John, Tell me which company bears the slogan, 'Just do it'?"
And John answered, "Mom...."
______________
Two Amish ladies were digging potatoes in the field. One lady
digs up two large potatoes bigger than her fist.
She says, "Oh my! These remind me of my husband Jebadiah's
balls."
The other woman gazed in wonder and said, "You mean his balls are
that BIG!"
"No!" the woman replied. "There're that dirty!"
_________
A widower who never paid any attention to his wife while she was alive
now found himself missing her desperately. He went to a psychic to see
if he could contact his late wife.
The psychic went into a trance. A strange breeze wafted through the
darkened room, and suddenly, the man heard the unmistakable voice of his
dearly departed wife.
"Honey!" he cried. "Is that you?"
"Yes, my husband."
"Are you happy?"
"Yes, my husband."
"Happier than you were with me?"
"Yes, my husband."
"Then Heaven must be an amazing place!"
"I'm not in Heaven, dear."
________________
A guy walks into the bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and says,
"Honey, this is the cow I make love to when you have a headache."
The wife, laying in the bed reading a book, looks up and says,
"If you weren't such an idiot, you'd know that's a sheep, not a cow."
The guy replies, "If you weren't such a presumptuous bitch, you'd
realize I was talking to the sheep."
_______________
SYDESJOKES LIST
Baggage Handling Complaint
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000113.html
Ball Girl
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000114.html
Ballet Ford
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000115.html
__________
BUFFALO Bill
1426
http://www.buffaloschips.com/agtrrre.htm
Mrs Hughes
http://www.buffaloschips.com/agtrre.htm
Friends
http://www.buffaloschips.com/akjijk.htm
1802
http://www.buffaloschips.com/dkjksjks.htm
THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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