Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
Wesley sent a site today on the Soviets recovering one of our
Apollo Mock-ups http://www.astronau
We had loaned it to the British so they could practice a capsule
recovery in case one of our landings missed and they had to
recover it. It never ceased to amaze me how they managed
to calculate a flight to the moon and back and land that capsule
within twenty miles of its target. When I was stationed on a carrier
I always hoped that we would get to recover one of the capsules
just to be involved with the Space Program but with the Space
Program ending just after Vietnam there was never a chance and
smaller carriers and LPH's got the job.
North Island Naval Air Station had one of the mock-ups sitting on
base and it only took passing by it once to realize it wasn't a real
one. I was told it had been used in the training of the Ticonderoga
for one of the recoveries. It was pretty rusty and orange but I
heard
they sent it to a museum after a fresh paint job.
That big parking lot in between several of the supply buildings at
that air station was always full of strange and wondrous sights as
it was the staging area for damaged aircraft that were waiting for
a spot at the rework facility. The helicopters and planes that were
sent there were wrapped in a thick white protective plastic shrink
wrap and you always wondered what had happened to it that
they couldn't fly it back.
Enjoy the chips.... buffalo
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parrot Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mike was walking past a pet shop one day and noticed a parrot in a
cage hanging outside. As he approached, the parrot said, "Hello.
What's your name?" "Mike," responded the young man. Several days
later, Mike again approached the pet shop. "Hello, Mike." said the
parrot. Mike was amazed, and decided to go inside and buy the bird.
The clerk told him the parrot was not for sale. "I really want that
parrot," said Mike. "Name your own price." The clerk saw an
opportunity to make some money, so he told Mike, "I can't sell Polly
because she belongs to the owner. But I can get you some of her
eggs. They're $100 each, and you'll have to come back after hours so
I can sneak them out to you." Mike orders 1/2 dozen eggs and agrees
to come back later that night. The clerk decides to gather a mixture
of different eggs to increase the likelyhood of having some of them
hatch, and when Mike comes back that night - he sells him the 6
eggs. A couple weeks later the eggs hatch - but instead of parrots,
Mike has a baby chicken, turkey, duck, goose, owl, and a robin. The
following week he once again approaches the pet shop. "Hello, Mike,"
says the parrot. "Don't you talk to me, you slut." responds Mike.
"You'd sleep with anything."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
Phone Sex
http://www.thepostm
<a href="http://www.thepostm
I can Only
http://www.thepostm
<a href="http://www.thepostm
Sexy?
http://www.thepostm
<a href="http://www.thepostm
Firemen
http://www.sydesjok
Fireworks Factory Smoking Area
http://www.sydesjok
First Date Dress
http://www.sydesjok
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Golf Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Finally having scraped enough money together for a trip to the
Bahamas, Todd arrived only to learn that the hotel at which he
wanted to stay, the St. Regis, charged $200 a day. Although that
included a continental breakfast, the pool and free golf, he simply
couldn't afford that much money. Dragging his gear around town, he
finally found a hotel every bit as nice but only cost $50 a day.
Settling in, he decided to get in a few rounds of golf before
sunset.
Bringing his clubs to the hotel course, he went to buy a three-pack
of balls from the Pro Shop.
"That will be $100," said the man behind the counter.
"What?" screamed Todd. "That's outrageous! They're free at the St.
Regis!"
"Yes," said the man, "but at the St. Regis they get you by the
rooms."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Turbo Snake
Simply glide Turbo Snake down the drain, twirl, then pull out Turbo
SnakeT specially designed head grabs & locks onto hair clogs to
remove and free the drain instantly! What's best, its flexible
design easily maneuvers down the drain to seek out clogs without
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tubs. Each set includes the Large Turbo Snake for Showers and Tubs,
Small Turbo Snake for Sinks, and Peel and Stick Storage Hook. Now
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View Website
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Animal Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dog: "Oh, God, not again. Let's turn the hose on them."
Dog: "Great, there goes the urge to drink out of the toilet."
Cat: "Y'know, if I didn't have a tail, I'd try that."
Dog: "I've heard about that position -- it's called 'human style.'"
Sheep: "It's just a phase. He'll be back."
Dog: "How strange -- why would you want
someone else to lick it for you?"
Rabbits: "Amateurs!"
Dog: "Geez, they have to look at each other's *faces*
while they're doing that??"
Dog: "Let's hop on and make it a conga line!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Kangaroo Keeper
Instantly organize any bag with the Kangaroo Keeper. Coming in
different sizes and colors, coordinate it with any style. Be able
to access up to 70 items in seconds with various compartments. Never
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for just the cost of shipping and handling
View Website
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Random Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Are you aware of the discovery in the human body of a nerve that
connects the eyeball to the asshole? It is called the anal optic
nerve. It is responsible for giving people a shitty outlook on
life.If you don't believe me, pull a hair from your ass and see if
it doesn't bring a tear to your eye.
I saw a beggar who was so broke that he was standing on the corner
shouting as the cars went by,... "WILL WORK FOR CARDBOARD AND A
MAGIC MARKER!"
Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young are on tour again. You can tell the
band has aged. Their groupies still get them drugs. But now there's
a $10 co-pay.
Q. What does a blonde say after a multiple orgasm?
A. "Way to go, team!"
Q. What does a woman say to a man who she has just had sex with? A.
Say whatever she wants... he's asleep.
I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it...so I said
"Implants?"
Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
Dr. Scholl's is merging with a condom manufacturer. So ladies, if
your boyfriend says he's wearing protection, make him take his shoes
off first!
Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the
toy.
A wicker basket is one of those baskets that you put flowers in, and
a wicker box is what Elmer Fudd did to his girlfriend.
Q. How can you tell if you're on a Jewish golf course?
A. Instead of yelling, "FORE!" they yell, "$3.99!
A female officer arrested a man for drunk driving.
The female officer tells the man, "Sir, you have the right to remain
silent. Anything you say will be held against you." The drunk
replies, "Breasts."
Only in America do we have a general in charge of the post office
and a secretary in charge of defense.
"A wedding ring is like a tourniquet -- it cuts off your
circulation!
A botanist claimed to have discovered a nomadic tree in the African
jungle. Apparently it just packs up its trunk and leaves. <GROAN>
<And another>"The man who started the Dunkin' Donuts chain has
passed away at the age of 87. Doctors said they knew he was gone
when his eyes just glazed over." -Jay Leno
During the Richard Nixon debacle, and the "Saturday Night Massacre,
in which Nixon fired his special prosecutor Archibald Cox, a bumper
sticker displayed the next day in Washington read, "Nixon is a Cox
sacker."
Remember, there's no "I" in "TEAM" -- but there *is*
an "EAT ME" if you're willing to use the "E" twice. - (Lewis Shiner)
Why is it that a woman can guide a 1.5" diameter penis into an inch
diameter vagina in pitch black darkness without looking and cannot
park a
6 foot car in a 7 foot parking spot in broad daylight?
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Background Check Them-You have the Right to Know the Truth!
As the news continues to reminds us, it's pretty easy to pretend to
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Pandemic Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next pandemic
I went to a dinner party last night. I awoke this morning not
feeling well, with what could be described as flu-like symptoms;
headache, nausea, chills, sore eyes, etc.
From the results of some initial testing, I have unfortunately
tested positive for what experts are now calling Wine Flu.
This debilitating condition is very serious - and it appears this is
not an isolated case.
Reports are flooding in from all around the country of others
diagnosed with Wine Flu. To anyone that starts to exhibit the
aforementioned tell-tale signs, experts are recommending a cup of
tea and a bit of a lie down.
However, should your condition worsen, you should immediately rent a
DVD and take some Advil (Advil seems to be the only drug available
that has been proven to help combat this unusual type of flu).
Others are reporting a McDonald's Happy Meal can also help in some
cases. If not, then further application of the original liquid, in
similar quantities to the original dose, has been shown to do the
trick.
Wine Flu does not need to be life threatening and, if treated early,
can be eradicated within a 24-48 hour period.
NOTE
If you find you are complaining a lot, it may be that it has mutated
into Whine Flu. This is particularly common in men and can quickly
spread to their partners where the symptoms are detected as a
serious case of eye-rolling.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
TAME YOUR SHOES!
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- Protects and organizes
- Saves valuable closet space
- Store almost anywhere
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Moanin' Mike is sitting in his local bar with his buddies, sharing a
beer and bragging about his sex life. Moanin' says, I have great sex
with my wife. She's very vocal, she can really rattle the windows,
and
most of it really turns me on. I love it when she screams, 'Harder!'
I
love it when she screams, 'Faster!' "Man, you lucky dog! Says his
one
buddy. But come on and tell the truth, isn't there sometimes a
problem
with your sex life?" "The only problem I have..." Moanin' said
dejectedly, "Is when she screams, ....'Deeper!
~~~~~~~
Mike: Do you remember first meeting your wife?
John: Sure, I found Jill lying face down in the gutter. I lifted her
to
her feet and promised her that if she agreed to marry me, she would
begin a new life and I'd never allow her near the gutter again.
Mike: Wow, I hope she appreciates what you did for her.
John: Not really. Jill hated to give up bowling.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Perfect Fit Buttons are the quickest and easiest way to add or
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You'll receive four Perfect Fit Buttons for jeans, khaki, brown and
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Limited time offer so act now.
Click the link below for more information:
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Old Broad Top
http://silverandgol
Within A Dream
http://www.carolspo
Christ's Bell
http://www.shangral
Signs Of A Bad Day
http://www.shangral
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Now It's Your Turn To SCOOP UP some cash.
Wireless companies have accidentally stumbled and "opened up" an
impressive income opportunity to grab during the worst economy we've
seen in over 50 years.
And here's everything they don't want you to know...
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Surfin Surfari
WTC UFO Via Wesley
http://www.anomalie
Archeology Via Wesley
http://tinyurl.
POW Network Phonies Site
http://www.pownetwo
Little Christmas
http://en.wikipedia
The murder of Kurt Cobain Via Wesley
http://tinyurl.
Soviets Recover Apollo Capsule
http://www.astronau
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Okay, everyone is telling me that I'm an insane millionaire who must
have gone absolutely crazy for doing this today and tomorrow,
especially on Thankgiving of all days, but I don't care anymore
because I think it's just the right thing to do.
Okay, let me catch my breathe while I type this because you're not
going to believe this...First off, thank you so much for taking a
minute to read this, my name is Justin Blake, and I'm a millionaire
that was dared to do something insane tonight and tomorrow morning,
and if you're interested in knowing what it is then read below, but
you'll need to hurry because you may only have a few minutes to take
advantage of this:
As part of an insane marketing test, I'm giving away my Online
Business Kit, but I'm only giving it away this today and tomorrow
morning.....
Press here to get your copy:
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
*+*+*+*+*+*+
We are giving away DATING SITE memberships TODAY! But not to a
regular dating site full of people that don't know what they want.
Our singles know EXACTLY what they want!
If you are over 18 years of age, then we want to give you a -FREE-
membership to the best ADULT DATING SITE around! All of the members
of this dating community want to meet up with new people for one
intimate and fun encounters! You have to check it out!
Now, we only have 197 memberships to give away. So if you DO NOT
want to date beautiful singles in your city for intimate encounters
then do not accept this membership that we want to give you for no
cost.
If you DO want to have a LOT of fun with singles that are awesome to
look at and even better to make meet in real life, then take
advantage of this -FREE- membership right now.
Press here to join for NO COST:
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Darik's Boot and Nuke - Via Robert
http://www.dban.
Dog Waffle Paint
http://www.thebest3
The Babbage Engine | Computer History Museum Via Wesley
http://tinyurl.
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Listen, you will have no one but yourself to blame if you don't go
on an intimate date this weekend with a beautiful single woman or
man! NO ONE BUT YOURSELF TO BLAME!!!
Why will we blame you? Because we are giving away memberships to our
ADULTS ONLY dating community this week....and you can get one right
now for no cost...but we will not be giving them away forever.
PRESS HERE to meet single women or men this week for an intimate
date:
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Animal World
Doggie Zone
http://www.hotdogor
http://www.lacetole
Kitty Korner
*+*+*+*+*+*+
We understand that you may have accidentally deleted important
documents, pictures, or other various files from your computer that
you thought you could never get back.
Well, we wanted to let you know that you can easily get your deleted
pictures, documents, or files back today using a program called File
R/D.
You can easily try File R/D right now, for no cost, to run a -free-
analysis scan that will allow you to view deleted pictures, files,
documents, etc... Once you have complete the -free- analysis scan
you will be amazed by what you see! In fact, you will even see what
other people have deleted from your computer.
Once the scanning is complete you will have full control over which
files you want to recover.
Press here to run the -free- analysis scan:
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Here is some more information about this new way to watch
television:
1) All of the programming is uncensored!
2) There are hundreds of channels from around the world to watch!
And new channels are added every day!
3) Hundreds of Radio stations to listen to anytime, all of the time!
And new stations are added daily!
4) All of these channels are available 24 hours per day right from
your PC and laptop!
5) No additional hardware is needed!
6) You won't have to pay a cable or satellite bill any longer!
Press Here For More Information and To Download Now:
http://buffalosjoke
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Movie Links
When Not To Clean your Glasses http://www.buffalos
Where
http://www.buffalos
Where Croissants Come From
http://www.buffalos
Why Men Have Bikes
http://www.buffalos
Why Sex Before Marriage is Essential
http://www.buffalos
Why Women Watch Football
http://www.buffalos
Why Women Live Longer Than Men
http://www.buffalos
Willie You Don't Think I'm Funny Anymore
http://www.buffalos
Women Drivers
http://www.buffalos
Women's Instructional Video
http://www.buffalos
Word Riddle
http://www.buffalos
World's Best Trick
http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Stress Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
EXPRESSIONS FOR HIGH STRESS DAYS
1. Well, aren't we just a ray of fucking sunshine.
2. Make yourself at home. Clean my kitchen.
3. Not the brightest crayon in the box, are we now?
4. A hard-on doesn't' t count as personal growth.
5. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after.
6. Do I look like a fucking people person?
7. You! Off my planet!!
8. I like cats too. Let's exchange recipes.
9. I wish for world peace, harmony and nakedness.
10 Let me show you how the guards used to do it
11. See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.
12. Allow me to introduce my selves.
13. Whisper my favorite words: I'll buy it for you.
14. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
15. Here I am! Now what are your other two wishes?
16. I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.
17. How many times do I have to flush you before you go away?
18. I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?
19. It's sick the way you people keep having sex without me.
20. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.
21. Can I trade this job for what's behind door # 2
22. Okay, okay, I take it back! UNFUCK YOU!
23. Just smile and say "Yes Mistress,"
24. Mommy, I want to grow up to be a neurotic bitch just like
you.
25. A woman's favorite position is CEO.
26. This is a mean, fucking cruel world & I want my nappy and
medication right now.
27. Everyone thinks I'm psychotic except my friends deep
inside the earth.
28. Earth is full. Go home.
29. Is it time for your medication or mine?
30. And which dwarf are you?
31. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Air Climber - Make Exercise Fun Again
Only Air Climber has air power technology to help you work out. Get
cardio, weight loss and tighter abs while you step on air. It's the
fun workout that uses air to eliminate impact, while still burning
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Lose 10 lbs or 10 inchs in 10 days guaranteed.
http://buffaloschip
View Web Version
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
christmas spirit
http://www.buffalos
chronic boner
http://www.buffalos
chute
http://www.buffalos
cigar
http://www.buffalos
cigarette
http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Home Smart Power Dock
Say goodbye to counter clutter forever with Power Dock. Keep your
cell phone, charger, music player and more without any tangling.
Hooks are also attached for hanging keys. Stay organized, charged
and ready to go whenever, wherever - from your home to your office.
Order today and we'll double the offer.
View Web Version
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The lady wasn't even in the mood
The first time she saw a man nude,
When asked if she'd like sex
Thought it couldn't be complex
And just sat on what she saw protrude
***
The lady was ready to entice
She said once a night was quite nice
And doing it twice was surely no bore
But she really prefered three times or more
Addin' Tabasco to whipped cream for spice
***
They said the guy was an odd sort
Not a dwarf but incredibly short
When finally able to get a gal in bed
It's been told that in total awe she said
"My God! That's not a dick it's a wart"
Yer Hillbilly friend in TN...
Ross
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Prevent pet accidents in your home with Pet Zoom Pet Park. It's made
of a synthetic grass like surface that prevents stains and rinses
clean in seconds. Unlike dripping newspapers and expensive wee wee
pads, Pet Zoom Pet Park's reusable surface stays fresh and sanitary.
Use it for training puppies to special needs dogs to long days at
the office.
Protect your upholstery and flooring with Pet Zoom Pet Park.
View Website
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The other day I was walking by this convention center and I heard a
crude remark made towards me. I told them to blow me. Little did I
know it was the international nymphomaniacs convention. Six days
later the police found me in the gutter. I had lost 30 pounds and
later at the hospital it took 12 hours of surgery to get the smile
off my face.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Emery Cat is The Fun New Kitty Scratcher That Actually Grooms
Cats Claws While They Play! The secret is the patented honeycomb
surface that works like a nail file, gently filing away sharpness.
Your package includes:
Durable Base with built in catnip
Cute, playful kitty toy
Packet of catnip
Bonus De-shedder
Buy 1 get 1 FREE Now for only $19.95 plus you'll receive the Bonus
Gift absolutely FREE!
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A beautiful woman walked into a famous castle with Olympic size
swimming pool appeared in so many movies with a great thrilling
history. She could not resist the opportunity to look like a famous
actress and decided to go skinny-dipping. She looked around, didn't
see anyone, and undressed. Just as she was about to dive in, the
chief caretaker appeared from behind the bush where he was hiding
all
along. He looked at her lusciously and told her that swimming was
prohibited. "You could have told me that before I undressed!" She
scolded him. The caretaker replied, "Swimming is prohibited,
undressing isn't."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dryer Maid Dryer Ball
Get rid of pet hair from clothes, sheets and towels while they
tumble in your dryer. The Dryer Maid is like thousands of tiny lint
brushes in every load of laundry and it automatically releases it
into your lint trap for quick disposal.
Save money and time for only $14.99 + S&H.
View Website
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1752
New Year
Diana: I think he looks cute.
Rudy: I look silly.
BJ: The hat on your head is a New Year's tradition Rudy. We all
have
one on.
Rudy: Hrumpt! Looks silly.
Sandi: I don't mind.
Diana: Remember this year instead of fireworks we are having pork
chops!
Rudy: Okay I can wear the silly hat for pork chops.
BJ: I tell you what Diana, it seems just the other day I was
working
on the Y2K project at work and that was ten years ago.
Diana: Yeah, and you were at work that night and even had a bomb
threat at work.
BJ: That is old news, look the clock is ticking down... 2010 is
almost
here.
Katie: 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2...1 Happy New Year!!!
BJ: May everyone have a HAPPY NEW YEAR from us to you!
The herd in Guthrie
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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