[buffalos-adult-chips] Chips For 11-29-10

 



Adult Adult

I just slept most of the way through Monday. At first I thought
this was pretty strange but then I remembered that I was on day
three of no Diet Coke. I have been going through the stuff lately
like it was water, sometimes drinking 2 two liters a day and frankly
it wasn't tasting very good anymore. It had been my original intention
to replace it with coffee which I have a stock of but the coffee
pot is over at Buffy's house and I didn't have the ambition to go
get it. I'll keep this short and let you have your jokes as late as they
may be, I had two cups of hot chocolate to ease off the headache
a bit but it just doesn't make you creative like a 16 oz. cup of
gas station coffee.

Enjoy the chips... buffalo

A Newsletter You may Enjoy

ROTTEN JOKES
:-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-)
Rotten Jokes (rated R-X)
These jokes are sooooo ROTTEN
you DON'T want your mother to read them!
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YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!!!!!!
:-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-):-)

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Watch Chips
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A young Jew and an old Jew are riding on a bus
in Jerusalem.

The young Jew asks, "Excuse me, sir, what time
is it?"

The old Jew doesn't answer.

"Excuse me, sir," the young Jew asks again,
"what time is it?"

The old Jew looks up him, but still doesn't
answer.

The young Jew is puzzled, "Sir, forgive me for
interrupting you all the time, but I really
want to know what time it is. Why won't you
answer me?"

The old Jew turns toward the young man and says,
"Son, the next stop is the last on this route.
I don't know you, so you must be a stranger to
this land. If I answer you now, according to
Jewish tradition, I must invite you to my
home. You're handsome and I have a beautiful
daughter. You would fall in love with her and
you'd want to get married. And tell me, why
would I want a son-in-law who can't even afford
a fucking watch?"

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Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait

good news
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w043.html

Margo says
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w044.html

selective hearing
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w045.html

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Short Chips
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How do you get your husband interested in oral sex?
Douche with beer.

What do you call a gay gentleman from the Deep South?
A homo-sex-y'all.

Hear about the new gay sitcom?
Leave it, it's Beaver.

Why is sex is like software?
For everyone who pays for it, there are hundreds getting it free.

What's the most active muscle in a woman ?
The penis.

What's the difference between a sorority and a circus?
A circus is a cunning array of stunts.

What's the definition of a vicious circle?
A pussy with teeth.

How can you tell if a woman really likes oral sex?
She hikes up her skirt every time someone yawns.

How do you get a woman off during sex?
Push her.

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Anger Chips
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. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ANGER MANAGEMENT

When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it
out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know -- take it out on
someone you don't know.

I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I had forgotten to
make. I found the number and dialed it.

A man answered, saying, "Hello."

I politely said, "Could I please speak with Robin Carter?"

Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on me.

I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude. I realized I had called the
wrong number.

I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. I had accidentally
transposed the last two digits of her phone number.

After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.

When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled, "You're an asshole!" and
hung up.

I wrote his number down with the word 'asshole' next to it, and put it in my
desk drawer.

Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd
call him up and yell, "You're an asshole!" It always cheered me up.

When Caller ID came to our area, I thought my therapeutic 'asshole' calling
would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John
Smith from the Telephone Company. I'm just calling to see if you're familiar
with the Caller ID program?"

He yelled, "NO!" and slammed the phone down.

I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an asshole!"

One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot. Some
guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently
waited for..

I hit the horn and yelled that I had been waiting for that spot.

The idiot ignored me.

I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his car window so, I wrote down his number.

A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole (I had his
number on speed dial), I thought I had better call the BMW asshole, too.

I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"

"Yes, it is."

"Can you tell me where I can see it?"

"Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house, and the car's
parked right out in front."

"What's your name?" I asked.

"My name is Don Hansen," he said.

"When's a good time to catch you, Don?"

"I'm home every evening after five."

"Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"

"Yes?"

"Don, you're an asshole."

Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too.

Now, when I had a problem, I had two assholes to call.

But after several months of calling them, it wasn't as enjoyable as it used
to be.

So, I came up with an idea.

I called Asshole #1.

"Hello."

"You're an asshole!"

(But I didn't hang up.)

"Are you still there?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said.

"Stop calling me," he screamed.

"Make me," I said.

"Who are you?" he asked.

"My name is Don Hansen.."

"Yeah? Where do you live?"

"Asshole, I live at 1802 West 34th Street, a yellow house, with my black
Beamer parked in front."

He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying
your prayers."

I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole."

Then I called Asshole #2.

"Hello?" he said.

"Hello, asshole," I said.

He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are...!"

"You'll what?" I said.

"I'll kick your ass," he exclaimed.

I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now."

Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at
1802 West 34th Street, and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay
lover.

Then I called Channel 13 News about the gang war going down on West 34th
Street.

I quickly got into my car and headed over to 34th street.

When I got there, I saw two assholes beating the crap out of each other in
front of six squad cars, a police helicopter, and the channel 13 news crew.

NOW, I feel better - This is Anger Management at its very best.

Stan Kegel

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When a woman in my office became engaged, a colleague offered her some
advice. "The first ten years are the hardest," she said.

"How long have you been married?" I asked.

"Ten years," she replied.

?

- - - - -

?

This couple had been going out together for quite a while and was thinking
about getting married. They finally decided to spend a night in a motel to
see if they were sexually compatible.

The next morning he dropped her off at her apartment and he said, "So long
Lucy."

She said, "Goodbye, Shorty."

?

- - - - -

?

The young Swedish au pair had been working for the Schmitts for more than a
year. While hardworking and efficient, she still struggled with English.

One day she told Mrs. Schmitt that she had received good news from her
boyfriend Sven.

?

"He is coming visit me from army next week!"

"That's wonderful," the woman replied. "How long is his furlough?"

"Oh," the young woman said, "about long as Mr. Schmitt's. Maybe little
thicker."

?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Prison Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There was a German, an Italian and an Irishman on death row.
The Warden gave them a choice of three ways to die:
1. to be shot
2. to be hung
3. to be injected with the AIDS virus for a slow death.
So the German said, "Shoot me right in the head."
Boom, he was dead instantly.

Then the Italian said, "Just hang me." (Snap, he was dead.)

Then the Irishman said, "Give me some of that AIDS stuff."
They gave him the shot, and the Irishman fell down laughing.
The guards looked at each other and wondered what was wrong with this guy.
Then the Irishman said, "Give me another one of those shots," so the guards
did.

Now he was laughing so hard, tears rolled from his eyes and he doubled over.
Finally the warden said, "What is wrong with you?"

"You guys are so stupid.....I'm wearing a condom."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com

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Subscribers and Friends

Melva/World of White
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Surfin Surfari

National Traffic and Road Closure Information
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Snow and Ice data
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Christmas Facts!
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Christmas Quiz
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32 nearby stars
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Okay, let me catch my breathe while I type this because you're not
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As part of an insane marketing test, I'm giving away my Online
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)

Free online Trojan Scanner - Scan your system for Trojans
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Digital On-line Canvas
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Movie Links

Sir Edmund
http://www.buffaloschips.com/81814.htm

Smoke Inhalation
http://www.buffaloschips.com/81815.htm

Sneeze Aivastus
http://www.buffaloschips.com/81816.htm

Sorry Sir no bathing suits in the lobby
http://www.buffaloschips.com/81817.htm

Sorry Officer
http://www.buffaloschips.com/81818.htm

Exam
http://www.buffaloschips.com/34t.htm

Future Engineers
http://www.buffaloschips.com/9o7.htm

Glock Home Protection
http://www.buffaloschips.com/78i6.htm

Gunfighter
http://www.buffaloschips.com/i7664.htm

Guterbike
http://www.buffaloschips.com/u64eh.htm

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Pelosi Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A cow suddenly jumps out into the road, they hit it full on, and the car
comes to a stop. Nancy, in her usual charming manner, says to the
chauffeur: 'You get out and check - you were driving.' The chauffeur gets
out, checks, and reports that the animal is dead but it was old.

'You were driving; go and tell the farmer,' says Nancy.

Two hours later, the chauffeur returns totally plastered, hair ruffled with
a big grin on his face.

'My God, what happened to you?' asks Nancy.

The chauffeur replies: 'When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle
of malt whisky, the wife gave me a slap-up meal and the daughter made love
to me.' 'What on earth did you say?' asks Nancy.
'I just knocked on the door and when it was answered, I said to them: 'I'm
Nancy Pelosi's chauffeur, and I've just killed the old cow.'

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Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Painting
http://www.buffaloschips.com/30813.htm

Can
http://www.buffaloschips.com/30812.htm

Booty call
http://www.buffaloschips.com/30814.htm

Pantie lock
http://www.buffaloschips.com/30815.htm

Amazon.com
http://www.buffaloschips.com/30816.htm

Show Girl
http://www.buffaloschips.com/30817.htm

Sperm Bank
http://www.buffaloschips.com/30818.htm

Big Daddy
http://www.buffaloschips.com/30819.htm

Best Catch
http://www.buffaloschips.com/30820.htm

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Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It seemed all was well for old Bill
For the night was romantic and still.
She was warm, she was waiting,
She was ripe for the mating
But alas--she was not on the pill.

An alluring but cranky au pair
Was arrested for lethal child care...
The kid was a pain
So she opened his vein,
But swears that he tripped on a stair.

A cannibal chef from Botswana
Said, "Oh it would be sheer Nirvana,
If only I could,
In full babyhood,
Saute an hors d'oeuvre from Montana."

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Fushigi - Magic Gravity Ball

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Everyone loves the art of Fushigi.

Learn More

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Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The latest Christmas toy has just hit the shops - a talking muslim doll.

Nobody knows what the heck it says cause no one has got the balls to pull
the cord.

Kent

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Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Katie's Komfort Kolumn

Vol 1932

Sandi, The Marvelous One

BJ is resting after a long day at work in his recliner.

Sandi is sitting up in front of his recliner as if to say 'I have

something for you.'

Sandi: Dad, look.

BJ: Okay let me see...ack a mouse. Is it dead?

Sandi: Hmm let me check.

Snap! Yes, it is now.

BJ: Let me throw it away.

Sandi: I thought you wanted these gone?

BJ: I do I paid for an exterminator to get rid of them.

Sandi: He got rid of most of them. Be right back.

A couple of minutes later.

Sandi: Dad?

BJ: Yes.

Sandi: Got another one.

The herd

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Adult Adult

*********************************************

Remember 9/11/01

Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list

In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:

William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783

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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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Funzines - Clean Cartoons November 30, 2010 C

 

pumpkin_flower
 
Michael, thank you, your donation helped us
celebrate the holiday.  Big Smooch!
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I really could use some content.....share the goodies!
Babes, Men, Wavs, Erotic Art, Cartoons etc.
Thank you, bunches!
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Find the perfect Christmas gift for that
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Give everyone a Chuckle
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Thank you, Your Editor
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[PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner



 


THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!


"If you obey all the rules
you miss all the fun."
~Katharine Hepburn

 

GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!

If a Conservative  doesn't like guns,
he doesn't buy one.
If a Green doesn't like guns, 
he wants all guns outlawed.  

If a Conservative is a vegetarian,
he doesn't eat  meat.
If a Green is a vegetarian, he wants all
meat products banned for everyone.  

If a Conservative is homosexual,
he quietly leads his  life.
If a Green is homosexual,
he demands legislated respect.  

If a Conservative is down-and-out,
he thinks about how to better his situation.
a Green wonders who is going to
take care of him.  

If a Conservative doesn't like a talk
show host, he switches channels.
Greens demand that those they
don't like be shut down. 

If a Conservative is a non-believer,
he doesn't go to  church.
A Green non-believer wants any mention
of God and religion silenced.

If a Conservative decides he needs health care,
he goes about shopping for it,
or may choose a job that provides it.
A Green demands that the rest of us pay for his.  

If a Conservative reads this, he'll forward
it so his friends can have a good laugh.
A Green will delete it because he's "offended".  

Well,  I forwarded it.

We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman

_______________

THE COMICS

all you need to know
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w036.html

intelligence is sexy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w037.html

a gift
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w038.html

we should get together
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w039.html

would you mind
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w040.html

______________

LETS GO TO THE MOVIES

feel the punch
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/469.html

we the people
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/470.html

egg nog challenge
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/471.html

An elderly woman decided to have her portrait
painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with
diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald
bracelets, a ruby broach, and a gold Rolex."
"But you are not wearing any of those things,"
replied the artist.
"I know," she said. "It's in case I should die
before my husband. I'm sure he will remarry right
away, and I want his new wife to go crazy looking
for the jewelry."
_______________

A guy walks into a bar with a dachshund under his
arm. The dog is wearing a Detroit Lions jersey and
helmet, and is festooned with Lion pom-poms. The
bartender says, "Hey! No pets are allowed! You'll
have to leave." The guy begs him, "Look, I'm desperate!
We're both big fans, the TV's broken at home,
and this is the only place around where we
can see the game."After securing a promise that the
dog will behave, and warning him that he and the dog
will be thrown out if there's any trouble, the
bartender relents and allows them to stay in the bar
and watch the game. The big game begins with the Lion's
receiving the kickoff. They march down field, get stopped
at the 30, and kick a field goal. Suddenly, the dog
jumps up on the bar and begins walking up and
down the bar giving high-fives to everyone.
The bartender says, "Wow, that's the most amazing
thing I've ever seen! What does the dog do if they score
a touchdown?" The owner replies,
"I don't know, I've only had him for three years."
_______________

Frank came into his wife's room one day.  "If I were, say,
disfigured, would you still love me?" he asked her.
"Darling, I'll always love you," she said calmly, filing her nails.
"How about if I became crippled and couldn't fulfill my
marital obligations to you any more?" he asked nervously.
"Don't worry, darling, I'll always love you," she told him,
buffing her nails."Well, how about if I lost my job as vice
president?" Frank went on, "if I weren't pulling in
six figures any more.  Would you still love me then?"
The woman looked over at her husband's worried face. 
"Frank, I'll always love you," she reassured him,
"but most of all, I'll really miss you."
_______________

BUFFALO BILL

Sure Lock
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Swan Song
http://www.buffaloschips.com/81827.htm

Talent
http://www.buffaloschips.com/81828.htm
_______________

FUN PAGES

Potato Carrot
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=42222&s=n

Agatha Christie: Death on the Nile
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41663&s=n

Must Wash Hands
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41409&s=n

Word Zen
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41813&s=n

THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman

 

 

 

 



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[buffalos-adult-chips] Chips For 11-28-10

 



Adult Adult

Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.

A Different Christmas Poem Via Mrs. Spider

The embers glowed softly, and in their dim light,
I gazed round the room and I cherished the sight.
My wife was asleep, her head on my chest,
My daughter beside me, angelic in rest.
Outside the snow fell, a blanket of white,
Transforming the yard to a winter delight.

The sparkling lights in the tree I believe,
Completed the magic that was Christmas Eve.
My eyelids were heavy, my breathing was deep,
Secure and surrounded by love I would sleep.
In perfect contentment, or so it would seem,
So I slumbered, perhaps I started to dream.

The sound wasn't loud, and it wasn't too near,
But I opened my eyes when it tickled my ear..
Perhaps just a cough, I didn't quite know, Then the
sure sound of footsteps outside in the snow.
My soul gave a tremble, I struggled to hear,
And I crept to the door just to see who was near.

Standing out in the cold and the dark of the night,
A lone figure stood, his face weary and tight.
A soldier, I puzzled, some twenty years old,
Perhaps a Marine, huddled here in the cold.
Alone in the dark, he looked up and smiled,
Standing watch over me, and my wife and my child.

"What are you doing?" I asked without fear,
"Come in this moment, it's freezing out here!
Put down your pack, brush the snow from your sleeve,
You should be at home on a cold Christmas Eve!"
For barely a moment I saw his eyes shift,
Away from the cold and the snow blown in drifts..

To the window that danced with a warm fire's light
Then he sighed and he said "Its really all right,
I'm out here by choice. I'm here every night."
"It's my duty to stand at the front of the line,
That separates you from the darkest of times.

No one had to ask or beg or implore me,
I'm proud to stand here like my fathers before me.
My Gramps died at ' Pearl on a day in December,"
Then he sighed, "That's a Christmas 'Gram always remembers."
My dad stood his watch in the jungles of ' Nam ',
And now it is my turn and so, here I am.

I've not seen my own son in more than a while,
But my wife sends me pictures, he's sure got her smile.
Then he bent and he carefully pulled from his bag,
The red, white, and blue... an American flag.
I can live through the cold and the being alone,
Away from my family, my house and my home.

I can stand at my post through the rain and the sleet,
I can sleep in a foxhole with little to eat.
I can carry the weight of killing another,
Or lay down my life with my sister and brother..
Who stand at the front against any and all,
To ensure for all time that this flag will not fall.."

" So go back inside," he said, "harbor no fright,
Your family is waiting and I'll be all right."
"But isn't there something I can do, at the least,
"Give you money," I asked, "or prepare you a feast?
It seems all too little for all that you've done,
For being away from your wife and your son."

Then his eye welled a tear that held no regret,
"Just tell us you love us, and never forget.
To fight for our rights back at home while we're gone,
To stand your own watch, no matter how long.
For when we come home, either standing or dead,
To know you remember we fought and we bled.
Is payment enough, and with that we will trust,
That we mattered to you as you mattered to us."

PLEASE, would you do me the kind favor of sending this to as many
people as you can? Christmas will be coming soon and some credit is
due to our
U.S service men and women for our being able to celebrate these
festivities. Let's try in this small way to pay a tiny bit of what
we owe. Make people
stop and think of our heroes, living and dead, who sacrificed
themselves for us.

LCDR Jeff Giles, SC, USN
30th Naval Construction Regiment
OIC, Logistics Cell One
Al Taqqadum, Iraq

GOD BLESS OUR TROOPS

Enjoy the Chips... buffalo

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A mother and daughter loved to play around. They partied everyday and
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they became seasoned and loose. One day, the daughter met the man of her
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be tight and he won't even notice it. So the daughter did what her mother
taught her and everything went well and the stupid husband didn't even
notice. This went on for a few months. Now, everytime the daughter wanted
to bathe, she would take out the apple and place it on the wash basin and
after bathing, she would put it back in her hole. One day, after bathing,
she forgot to put it back and left it on the wash basin.

The husband came into the washroom and saw the apple and thought that her
wife left the apple for him and he ate it, Honey, thanks for the apple. It
tasted great! Shocked, the daughter dare not tell her husband about it and
went to consult her mother, Mom, I'm in deep shit now!

I took out the apple while I was bathing and I forgot to put it back and
Peter found the apple I left on the wash basin and ate it! What should I
do? Will he be poisoned? I'm scared, Mother said, Don't worry dear, a few
years ago, your father ate the WATERMELON I left in the washroom and he
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Agent Chips
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Little Johnny Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So ya see, little Johnny is sitting in class one day, and the
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him try to answer the question. So little Johnny says: the farmer
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the teacher then asks the class what kind of animal is the weather
vane? again no one but little Johnny seems to know the answer.
Reluctantly she lets him answer. Little Johnny sez with a big ol
smile on his face: "why teacher, it's a cock!", well the teacher
sighs to herself well after all it is. So next the teacher asks the
class: " can anyone tell me why does the farmer use a cock on the
barn as a weather vane?" Of course, the same dumb blank look on all
of the kids faces, cept of course, for little Johnny, again she
reluctantly allows him to answer the question, knowing she's
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face: "Its a cock, cuz as everyone knows if it were a cunt, the
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Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A pair of stage-door Johnnies are ogling the cuties who are leaving the
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"Wow," said his buddy, "Do you mean to tell me you've been doing it with
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"No, I felt like it before, and I feel like it now."

~~~~~~~

A man on a business trip went to a singles bar, approached two ladies, and
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~~~~~~~

Little Johnny comes running into the backyard. He screams, "Pop!
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Boy the desert is hot and dry today. As I was driving along I passed this
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ways. I said, " If I can get it fixed or take you some where to get it
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~~~~~

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker
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The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the
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~~~~~

A bride who got a little too drunk at her wedding reception was still
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presents.
She stumbled through a short speech and then slowly turned to point to the
presents on display, which included a coffee percolator "And finally" she
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copulator"

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LynnLynn's Links
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If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
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Subscribers and Friends

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carolyn w/ Christmas In The Fifties ~ Jingle Bells ~ Ricky Nelson
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Childhood Christmas
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Q. Why are guys so good at video games?
A. It's the eye-hand coordination developed after all those years of
jerking off to Playboy centerfolds.
Why do they say that eating yogurt and oysters will improve your sex life?
Because if you'll eat that stuff, you'll eat anything <thanks Jim> Yo momma
so slutty that I could've been your daddy, but the guy in line behind me had
the correct change.

Yo momma nose so big you can go bowling with her boogers!

Yo momma nose so big she makes Pinocchio look like a cat!

Why are blondes lousy at mustering cattle?
Because they can't keep their calves together. <Thanx Greg> Heaven is when
you have barrels of beer and tons of girls.
Hell is when you find out that the barrels have holes and the girls don't!

Did you hear what the dyslexic Highway Patrolman did on New Year's?
He spent the whole night handing out I.U.D.'s

Woman serving dinner to husband:
"It's a hamburger surprise. You had it yesterday and the day before, and
you certainly didn't expect to get it again tonight."

Q. Why do women get their belly buttons pierced?
A. Where else would they hang the air freshener.

One day, near Christmas, Amy was walking down the street, singing to
herself, "All I want for Christmas is a 10" dick, a 10" dick, a 10" dick".
Buffalo, who was out shopping, upon hearing her song, turns and follows her,
singing "Here comes Santa Claus, Here comes Santa Claus"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There was a young lady named Hilda
Who went on a date with a Builder
She knew that he could
And he should and he would
And he did, and it bloody nigh killed her!

~~~

There was a young lady named Gloria,
Who was goosed by Sir Oswald Du Maurier...
And then by six men,
Sir Oswald again,
And the band at the Woldorf Astoria!

I Just Met A Girl From Peru,
Who Likes Off Beat Places To Screw.
We've Done It On Trains,
In Hammocks, On Planes,
And Next Week We'll Try A Canoe.

Yer Hillbilly friend in TN...
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PROUD father of an American Soldier

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

WHAT A REAL WOMAN DOES*

A real woman is a man's best friend. She will never stand him up and never
let him down. She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him
after a bad day.

She will inspire him to do things he never thought he could do; to live
without fear and forget regret. She will enable him to express his deepest
emotions and give in to his most intimate desires.

She will make sure he always feels as though he's the most handsome man in
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invincible. . .

No wait... Sorry... I'm thinking of beer. That's what beer does... Never
mind.

Dennis

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hi

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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Katie's Komfort Kolumn

Vol 1931

The First Thanksgiving in Caldwell

Diana: We have all four tables pulled out with the leaves extended.

I hope we have room for everyone.

BJ: We will. We will sit the head buffalo over there. We will sit Zoey

over here, and Don next to Diane just to get sparks going for the fire.

Our grandkids will be at the third and fourth table and our kids will join

us with our friends at the two main tables pulled together.

Rudy: Will someone get that bottle of Wild Turkey from Ross!

Katie: Yeah we do not want Horace to see the label 'Wild Turkey.'

Sandi: He might think it is a relative.

BJ: Everyone sit.here comes the food.

Tami: No tofu turkey?

Rob: Shhh Tami.

Diana: Everyone grab a paw or a hand or a claw as we say grace.

Dear Lord we thank for another year of living. We ask you remember

those who have passed on before us. Bless those who are protecting us

today and their loved ones. Bless this food and the hands that prepared

it. Amen.

Then the food war begins.

The herd

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Adult Adult

*********************************************

Remember 9/11/01

Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list

In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:

William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783

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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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__,_._,___

May 1 - Amazon’s Prime Video ads rollout shows promise | Why video is key to Roblox’s ad strategy

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