Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
It's 35 outside right now. The other night when I went to the store
it was 10 deg. When I came out of the store it was already up
to 22. I was wondering yesterday how this melt would affect
preparations for the Feb. 6 I-500 snowmobile race but they already
have an 11 inch base of ice on their one mile oval. I wonder how
many gallons of water that took. The thaw though is actually going
to help the racers as the melted ice will refreeze as smooth as if
you ran a Zamboni over it. The first few qualifiers will have a
great
track to run on and they usually get the best times. When you are
running tracks with carbide studs in them and carbide blades
on the skis it doesn't take long to start wearing the ice away.
We do seem to be having less problems on the website as bandwidth
increased yesterday which is a good indicator.
Enjoy the chips.... buffalo
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Football Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
10 SIGNS YOU WATCH TOO MUCH FOOTBALL
10. Before sex, you flip a coin to see who will receive.
9. You've been banned from the A&P for spiking melons.
8. To feel closer to some of your favorite players, you tear the
cartilage in your knee.
7. The kids bring home a good report card and you dump Gatorade on
'em.
6. Most humans: 75% water, you: 75% chip dip.
5. During sex, you use a play clock.
4. You pay $22 million to have Deion Sanders shovel off your
driveway.
3. For the last two months, you've been wearing nothing but a cup.
2. You fell in love with your wife because she looks like John
Madden.
1. After sex, you go for the 2-point conversion.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
new meaning
http://www.thepostm
thanks mom
http://www.thepostm
finger print
http://www.thepostm
Free Kick
http://sydesjokes.
Free Shower
http://sydesjokes.
French Lesson
http://sydesjokes.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Random Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A young women visited her eye doctor complaining of failing
eyesight.
The doctor sat her in front of a standard eye chart. Doctor: "Can
you read the bottom line?" Girl: "No." "Can you read the center
line?"
"No." "Can you read the large top line" "No."Can you even see the
chart?" "No." The doctor is clearly frustrated and whips his penis
out of his pants. "Can you see this?" "Of course!" "Well, there's
your problem - you're cock-eyed!"
This Jewish rock star went to his tailor and asked for a new pair of
pants that he could wear on the stage: "I want these pants to be
skin-
tight, I mean SKIN-TIGHT. I want them to see my equipment down
there."
Said the tailor, "Don't be worrying. Not only will they know about
your equipment, they'll be able to tell your religion."
A slutty girl is flirting with 2 guys in a chatroom. The first guy
asks, "What state are you from?" While at the same time the second
guy asks, "What do you do for a living?" To satisfy them both, She
replies, "Idaho."
Large cats can be dangerous, but a little pussy never hurt anyone.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The NotebookBuffer is the companion that your laptop has been
longing for! The revolutionary laptop pad dissipates heat, keeping
the machine cooler and you more comfortable.
Benefits:
Use in your carry bag for portable protection
Protects your laptop from spills
Weighs less than 4 ounces
Fits all laptops
Choose from blue, pink or black
Buy Now for only $19.95 and get a FREE Bonus!
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Football Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
FOOTBALL MOVES IN SEX
Hike = Up the rear
Reverse = 69
Sack = Girl takes control and gets frisky
2pt. conversion = multiple orgasms
Prevent Defense = Condom/protection
Face Mask = guy pulls girl head down to blow him
Shotgun = Touchdown in a car
Two minute warning = Guy gives the girl a warning before he blows
his load.
Holding = Cuddling
Superbowl = Wedding or Prom night
Huddle = Multiple participants
Madden '99 = Cyber sex
Instant replay = When you tape the two of you having sex Illegal
Use of the hands = Masturbation
Ball Hog = Slut
Onside Kick = Making up after a fight
Double Header = Two mates in the same night
Tight End = Virgin
Wide Receiver = Girl that's loose
False Start = Guy/Girl gets shut down (denied)
Pass Interference = Some stupid kid interrupts before you can get
some
Fumble = cheating (problem in the relationship)
Putting it through the uprights = self explanatory
Special Teams = Prostitute/Gigolo
Unsportsmanlike Conduct = Bragging to your friends about your
activities
Double Coverage = Two condoms
~~~~~~~~~~~~
What is ISO Kinetics?
ISOKinetics is a series of dynamic contractions that stimulate the
development of
lean muscle tissue. This means with the ISO Bo's slider handle
technology you'll
engage specific muscle groups for the full duration of the
contraction. You'll burn
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while developing
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The ISO Bo allows you to perform compound exercises contracting
various muscle groups, simultaneously, burning much more calories in
a shorter
period of time. Once you begin your fun and easy ISO Bo exercise
routines,
you'll start to transform your body and
health, giving you the body and mind you always wanted
This special offer is not available in stores. Order today and save!
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bet Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two farmers, Joe and Bob, lived as neighbors, but didn't like each
other much. In 1989, there was a period of -30 degree centigrade
cold and Bob and Joe had nothing to do because of it. So they bet a
bottle of vodka that can sit out on the window ledge the longest
with a bare ass.
After two hours Bob's wife came home and asked Bob, "What are you
doing?"
Bob explained and she said, "Come on, you will only freeze your ass
off."
Bob refused as he wanted to win the bet.
Then his wife got an idea. "Lets change places when Joe is looking
the other way." Bob's wife put on the same kind of pullover and cap
and traded places with Bob.
Half an hour later Joe's wife came home and asked him, "What are you
doing?"
Joe told her and said, "I am determined to win the bottle!"
"You are crazy. Come on in."
"Certainly not, I am already on the winning side. Bob lost his
balls half an hour ago!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mister Steamy - Steam Laundry Ball
Get soft, de-wrinkled clothes without an iron or dryer sheets.
Mister Steamy is the revolutionary new dryer ball with the power of
steam. Just add water, toss it in the dryer and as the dryer heats
up the ball steams up.
Turn your dryer into a wrinkle releasing machine.
Order today and we'll double your offer.
View Web Version
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed.
He shoots his friend and kills him.
Wife says, "If you keep on behaving like this, you'll lose ALL your
friends"
************
A small Boy wrote to Santa Claus, "Send me a brother."
Santa wrote back, "SEND ME YOUR MOTHER"
************
What is the definition of Mistress?
Someone between the Mister and Mattress.
************
What's the difference between stress, tension, and panic?
Stress is when wife is pregnant.
Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant.
Panic is when both are pregnant.
************
Teacher: Do you know the importance of a period?
Kid: Yeah, once my sister said she had missed one, and my mom
fainted,
dad had a heart attack, & our neighbor ran away.
************
A woman asks man who is traveling with six children,
"Are all these kids yours??"
The man replies sarcastically,
"No, I work in a condom factory and these are customer complaints."
************
A young boy asks his Dad,
"What is the difference between confident and confidential?
Dad says, "You are my son. I'm confident about that.
Your friend over there is also my son. That's confidential!
~~~~~~~~~~~~
National collector's mint - The 2010 $50 Gold buffalo tribute proof.
Recreates the first .9999 fine 24-karat gold clad tribute proof
struck by the U.S. Government and the purest gold coin ever minted.
Each 2010 $50 Gold Buffalo Tribute Proof comes complete with an
individually numbered Certificate of Authenticity.
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Golf Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
There was a guy so addicted to golf that all he did is go out on the
links every single day.
He had ambitions of making it to the Pros, so he took his game very
seriously.
One windy day while playing in the finals of a a tournament, the guy
was in contention, so he played every shot with utmost care and
concentration.
After all the scores were submitted, he was declared the winner of
the tournament.
He went home to his wife with the trophy and some small cash prize.
He kept repeating his round over dinner.
The wife, who is not the least bit interested in golf, got up and
went to bed early.
The guy follows after a few hours, still high on his golf
championship.
At around two in the morning, the wife jumps up and screams at her
husband, who also gets startled and wakes up.
"What happened? Why are you screaming?" the guy asked his wife.
"Why wouldn't I shout? You just pulled a patch of hair from my pussy
and threw it up in the air!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Simply glide Turbo Snake down the drain, twirl, then pull out Turbo
SnakeT specially designed head grabs & locks onto hair clogs to
remove and free the drain instantly! What's best, its flexible
design easily maneuvers down the drain to seek out clogs without
having to remove the drain stopper. For bathroom sinks, showers &
tubs. Each set includes the Large Turbo Snake for Showers and Tubs,
Small Turbo Snake for Sinks, and Peel and Stick Storage Hook. Now
only $10.00 plus S&H or double the offer for an extra P&H.
View Website
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~
f You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/You're Never Alone
http://silverandgol
Magic of Friendship
http://www.carolspo
LCS 2 USS Independence
http://www.shangral
ONLY ONE
http://www.wtv-
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Now It's Your Turn To SCOOP UP some cash.
Wireless companies have accidentally stumbled and "opened up" an
impressive income opportunity to grab during the worst economy we've
seen in over 50 years.
And here's everything they don't want you to know...
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*+*+*+*+*+*+
Surfin Surfari Via Wesley
2010 AL30: Incoming Asteroid
http://tinyurl.
Exotic Car Crashes, Porsche, Ferrari, BMW, Mercedes
http://tinyurl.
Body Worlds
http://en.wikipedia
Million Dollar Stories - Interesting
http://www.freeente
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Okay, everyone is telling me that I'm an insane millionaire who must
have gone absolutely crazy for doing this today and tomorrow,
especially on Thankgiving of all days, but I don't care anymore
because I think it's just the right thing to do.
Okay, let me catch my breathe while I type this because you're not
going to believe this...First off, thank you so much for taking a
minute to read this, my name is Justin Blake, and I'm a millionaire
that was dared to do something insane tonight and tomorrow morning,
and if you're interested in knowing what it is then read below, but
you'll need to hurry because you may only have a few minutes to take
advantage of this:
As part of an insane marketing test, I'm giving away my Online
Business Kit, but I'm only giving it away this today and tomorrow
morning.....
Press here to get your copy:
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Bots On Your Computer?
http://free.
Valentine Backs
http://norbert26.
Say No thanks to the microchip!
http://www.youtube.
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Listen, you will have no one but yourself to blame if you don't go
on an intimate date this weekend with a beautiful single woman or
man! NO ONE BUT YOURSELF TO BLAME!!!
Why will we blame you? Because we are giving away memberships to our
ADULTS ONLY dating community this week....and you can get one right
now for no cost...but we will not be giving them away forever.
PRESS HERE to meet single women or men this week for an intimate
date:
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Animal World
Doggie Zone
http://www.bowwow.
Kitty Korner
http://www.catage.
*+*+*+*+*+*+
We understand that you may have accidentally deleted important
documents, pictures, or other various files from your computer that
you thought you could never get back.
Well, we wanted to let you know that you can easily get your deleted
pictures, documents, or files back today using a program called File
R/D.
You can easily try File R/D right now, for no cost, to run a -free-
analysis scan that will allow you to view deleted pictures, files,
documents, etc... Once you have complete the -free- analysis scan
you will be amazed by what you see! In fact, you will even see what
other people have deleted from your computer.
Once the scanning is complete you will have full control over which
files you want to recover.
Press here to run the -free- analysis scan:
http://buffaloschip
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Here is some more information about this new way to watch
television:
1) All of the programming is uncensored!
2) There are hundreds of channels from around the world to watch!
And new channels are added every day!
3) Hundreds of Radio stations to listen to anytime, all of the time!
And new stations are added daily!
4) All of these channels are available 24 hours per day right from
your PC and laptop!
5) No additional hardware is needed!
6) You won't have to pay a cable or satellite bill any longer!
Press Here For More Information and To Download Now:
http://buffalosjoke
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Movie Links
1426
http://www.buffalos
Mrs Hughes
http://www.buffalos
Friends
http://www.buffalos
1802
http://www.buffalos
5700
http://www.buffalos
Magician Act Followed By Explanation
http://www.buffalos
Malcom-Jue-Bebe
http://www.buffalos
Marine And Geese
http://www.buffalos
Mary Did You Know
http://www.buffalos
Math 911
http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bad Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bad: You can't find your vibrator.
Worse: Your daughter "borrowed" it.
Bad: You find a porn movie in your son's room.
Worse: You're in it.
Bad: Your children are sexually active.
Worse: With each other.
Bad: Your husband's a cross dresser.
Worse: He looks better than you.
Bad: Your son's involved in Satanism.
Worse: As a sacrifice.
Bad: Your wife wants a divorce.
Worse: She's a lawyer.
Bad: Your wife's leaving you.
Worse: For another woman.
Bad: Your wife's leaving you.
Worse: To enter a convent.
Bad: Your wife's arrested for soliciting.
Worse: She implicates you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Background Check Them-You have the Right to Know the Truth!
As the news continues to reminds us, it's pretty easy to pretend to
be someone your not in this day and age. For the first time ever,
you can find out real and truthful information about people through
America's #1 Background Check. So next time you just aren't 100%
certain of the truth, protect yourself with an instant Background
Check.
Our Comprehensive Background Reports will show:
-Criminal Records
-Current and Previous Addresses
-Age and Date of Birth
-Relatives
-Property Value
-Social Network Scans
-So Much More
For a 7-Day Free Trial of Unlimited Background Checks
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
arts
http://www.buffalos
art oral
http://www.buffalos
as big as
http://www.buffalos
asleep
http://www.buffalos
ass good
http://www.buffalos
ass kiss
http://www.buffalos
ass scratch
http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Home Smart Power Dock
Say goodbye to counter clutter forever with Power Dock. Keep your
cell phone, charger, music player and more without any tangling.
Hooks are also attached for hanging keys. Stay organized, charged
and ready to go whenever, wherever - from your home to your office.
Order today and we'll double the offer.
View Web Version
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
NEWSWIRE--A college student is auctioning her virginity; bids exceed
3.7 milllion dollars.
This gal ain't what some would call "nice"
When sex is for sale, that's called "vice"
Career path she's chosen
You know, I'm supposing
So now we're just arguing price
This whore, to be very precise
Is naught but a young Heidi Fleiss
She may find deflowering
To be quite empowering
She can't, I will bet, do it twice
(Gary Hallock)
Stan Kegel
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Prevent pet accidents in your home with Pet Zoom Pet Park. It's made
of a synthetic grass like surface that prevents stains and rinses
clean in seconds. Unlike dripping newspapers and expensive wee wee
pads, Pet Zoom Pet Park's reusable surface stays fresh and sanitary.
Use it for training puppies to special needs dogs to long days at
the office.
Protect your upholstery and flooring with Pet Zoom Pet Park.
View Website
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A fellow passed a house with a little red light burning in front, so
he stepped inside. There was nothing in sight and nothing there but
an empty bare hallway, with two doors reading, "Over 35" and "Under
35."
He decided to be truthful and entered the door that said, "Over 35."
He found himself in another empty hallway, this one with two doors
that read, "Over 8 inches" and "Under 8 inches." Truthful again, he
went through the "Under 8 inches" door and found himself in another
empty hall, with two more doors reading, "Once a night" and "Over 4
times a night." Still wanting to be truthful, he entered the door
marked " Once a night" and found himself back out on the street.
The moral of this story is: "Always tell the truth and you'll never
get screwed."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Emery Cat is The Fun New Kitty Scratcher That Actually Grooms
Cats Claws While They Play! The secret is the patented honeycomb
surface that works like a nail file, gently filing away sharpness.
Your package includes:
Durable Base with built in catnip
Cute, playful kitty toy
Packet of catnip
Bonus De-shedder
Buy 1 get 1 FREE Now for only $19.95 plus you'll receive the Bonus
Gift absolutely FREE!
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was a hot day in Iowa. Helga hung the wash out to dry, put a
roast in the oven, then went down the street to pick up some dry
cleaning. "Gootness, it's hot," she mused to herself as she walked
down Main Street. She passed by a tavern and thought, "Vy nodt?" so
she walked in and took a seat at the bar. The bartender came up and
asked her what she would like to drink. "Ya know," Helga said, "it
is so hot I tink I'll have myself zee cold beer." The bartender
asked, "Anheuser Busch?" Helga blushed and replied, "Vell fine,
tanks, und how's yer pecker?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Prevent pet accidents in your home with Pet Zoom Pet Park. It's made
of a synthetic grass like surface that prevents stains and rinses
clean in seconds. Unlike dripping newspapers and expensive wee wee
pads, Pet Zoom Pet Park's reusable surface stays fresh and sanitary.
Use it for training puppies to special needs dogs to long days at
the office.
Protect your upholstery and flooring with Pet Zoom Pet Park.
View Website
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1757
The Cruise
Rudy: What do ya mean we are going on a cruise? What is a cruise?
Diana: We are all going on a ship. It will be a vacation. It will
be
warm where we are going, you can go swimming and have a lot
of fun.
Rudy: Well that sounds okay.
Katie: Can I steer the ship?
BJ: Pilot, not steer.
Sandi: As long as I am close to daddy.
Diana: We leave in 30 minutes, pack for a week.
Zoom!!!!
A few minutes later bags are stuffed in the car.
BJ: Hey, these are just Katie's bags. Each of us takes one large
bag.
Katie hangs her head as she starts to remove her seven bags....
Diana: Okay let's go! We are taking the bus.
Rudy: I am confused, I thought we were taking a cruise.
To be continued
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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