THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
There is no moral precept that does not
have something inconvenient about it.
Denis Diderot
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
The longer I live, the more I realize
the impact of attitude on life.
Attitude, to me is more important than facts.
It is more important than the past, than education,
than money, than circumstances, than failures,
than successes, than what other people think or say or do.
It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill.
It will make or break a company ...a church ...a home.
The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday
regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day.
We cannot change our past...
we cannot change the fact that people will act
in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable.
The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have,
and that is our attitude...
I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and
90% how I react to it. And so it is with you...
we are in charge of our attitudes.
by Charles Swindoll
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
___________
THE COMICS
necrophilia
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e010.html
what I've always wanted
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e011.html
because shit happens
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e012.html
so sad
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e013.html
offside rule explained to women
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e014.html
sleeping in
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e015.html
looking good
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e016.html
havin fun
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e017.html
an apple
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e018.html
submarines
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e016a.html
_________________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chew Your Ass Ou...
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9845.html
Dramatic WW2 Gun Camera Footage
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9846.html
Funny Accident Police
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9847.html
Funny Bloopers
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9848.html
April Fools - Mentos & Soda
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9850.html
___________
POWER POINT DISPLAYS
the rules
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd194.html
at night time
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd195.html
g'day!
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd196.html
Bernadette
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd197.html
__________________
"Nice threads, man," commented Donald when his buddy
showed up one day in a snappy new suit. "Where'd you pick 'em up?"
Richard beamed. "My wife got them for me. Pretty sharp, huh?"
"I'll say. What was the occasion?"
"Got me," admitted Richard with a cheerful shrug.
"I came home from work early the other day and there
they were, hanging over the chair in the bedroom."
_____________
One day a man went to England on a trip and met a woman
there, they grew to like each other enough for her to
come to America with the man on his flight home.
When they got back to America the man said "I would like
to show you an American pastime."
The woman said, "What is it?"
"Baseball," the man said.
The next day, the man took her to a baseball game.
The first man came up to the plate and hit the ball to right
field and got to first base, the next man bunted the ball
and beat the throw to first base. The third man came up
to the plate and he gets walked.
The man says, "Are you understanding this game?"
The woman says, "Yes, but what I don't understand is why
the thrower hurls the ball at the first player, and he
hits it. then he hurls the ball at the second player,
and he taps it and runs to where the other man was standing
And then the third player, this is the part I don't
understand, the thrower hurls the ball and he just
stands there - 4 times - and then he just walks to the
place where the other man was standing."
Then the man says, "Well that is because he has four balls."
The woman says "Poor thing, he couldn't run if he tried."
____________
12-Step Internet Recovery Program
1. I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my
newspaper like I used to, before the Internet.
2. I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one
hand typing.
3. I will get dressed before noon.
4. I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and
plan dinner before even thinking of the Internet.
5. I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few
friends and family that are Internet-deprived.
6. I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the
Internet.
7. I will read a book... if I still remember how.
8. I will listen to those around me and their needs and stop
telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the
Internet.
9. I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for
email.
10. I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if
it is necessary or not.
11. I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to
balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Internet.
12. Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed
sometime... and the Internet will always be there tomorrow!
While on a road trip, an elderly couple stopped at a
roadside restaurant for lunch. After finishing their meal,
they left the restaurant, and resumed their trip. When leaving,
the elderly woman unknowingly left her glasses on the table,
and she didn't miss them until they had been driving for
about forty minutes. By then, to add to the aggravation,
they had to travel quite a distance before they could find
a place to turn around, in order to return to the restaurant
to retrieve her glasses.All the way back, the elderly
husband became the classic grouchy man. He fussed and
complained, and scolded his wife relentlessly during the
entire return drive. The more he chided her, the more
agitated he became. He just wouldn't let up for a single minute.
To her relief, they finally arrived at the restaurant.
As the woman got out of the car, and hurried inside to retrieve
her glasses, the old geezer yelled to her, "While you're in
there, you might as well get my hat and the credit card."
_______________
Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant. While having a bite to eat,
they talk about their moonshine operation.
Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich,
begins to cough.After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in
real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says,
'Kin ya swallar?' The woman shakes her head no.
Then he asks, 'Kin ya breathe?'
The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no.
The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress,
yanks down her drawers and
quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.
The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and
the obstruction flies out of her mouth.
As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly
back to his table. His partner says, 'Ya know, I'd heerd of
that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver' but I ain't niver seed nobody do it!'
_________________
There are four blokes in a prison cell together: a zoophile,
a sadist, a necrophiliac and a gay guy.
The zoophile sighs and says, "You know, if there was a cat
here I'd f#*k it `til I pass out."
The sadist nods, and sighs, "And once you were done with it,
I'd torture it until it died."
The necrophiliac leans in and agrees, "Oh yeah, and once it
was dead I'd f#*k it `til I passed out too."
The gay guy, sitting in the corner, very softly says "miaow".
__________
Buffalo Bill
Girl On Bike
http://www.buffaloschips.com/axsd.htm
Giving Change
http://www.buffaloschips.com/asdsza.htm
Glade Plug Ups
http://www.buffaloschips.com/asdasw.htm
_____________
FUN PAGES
The Tudors
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41798&s=n
Bowser Ball
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41602&s=n
Lingerie Bowl
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=20491&s=n
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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