THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
Worry is like a rocking chair, it gives you
something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere
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GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
I woke up early this morning just before five like I usually
do, and discovered the power had gone out. Woke up the war department
since the alarms didn't work. Got her off to work. Turk the dog,
aka Carlos the rat, was oblivious to the whole matter. Youngest
daughter ignored the problem and promptly packed up her laptop and
went to the nearest coffee house that had internet. Son and me were
left to our own devices so we sat on the front porch for most of
the morning and played cribbage. Cribbage is a nice game. When all
else fails in life, you can always play cribbage.
Finally, a little after noon and a lunch at a nearby greasy spoon,
power came back on and I could get the list done.
And that my friends
is my story and I'm stickin to it.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue
Cordially
Martin aka the postman.
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THE COMICS
Sydny's big chance
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/h040.html
medical malpractice
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/h041.html
lets stop
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/h042.html
thats my boy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/h043.html
uh oh
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/h044.html
how cute
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/h045.html
the dough boy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/h046.html
_________________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
beerrun
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5730.html
what he's really thinking
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5731.html
never argue with a date on a bike
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5732.html
tuna
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5733.html
Once upon a time lived a beautiful Queen with large breasts.
Nick the Dragon Slayer obsessed over the Queen for this reason.
He knew that the penalty for his desire would be death should
he try to touch them, but he had to try.
One day Nick revealed his secret desire to his colleague,
David the physician, the King's chief doctor. David thought
about this and said that he could arrange for Nick to more
than satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1000 gold coins to arrange it.
Without pause, Nick readily agreed to the scheme.
The next day, David made a batch of itching powder and poured
a little bit into the Queen's bra while she bathed.
Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense.
Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident,
David informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if
applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that
tests had shown that, among all of the citizens of the kingdom,
only the saliva of Nick would work as the antidote to cure the itch.
The King, eager to help his Queen, quickly summoned Nick to their
chambers. David then slipped Nick the antidote for the
itching powder, which he put into his mouth, and for the next four
hours, Nick worked passionately on the Queen's large and magnificent
breasts. The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and Nick left
satisfied and was hailed by the King and Queen as a hero. Upon
returning to his chamber, Nick found David demanding his payment
of 1000 gold coins.. With his obsession now satisfied,
Nick couldn't have cared less knowing that David could never report
this matter to the King and with a laugh told him to get lost.
The next day, David slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder
into the King's underwear. The King immediately summoned Nick . . .
The moral of the story - Pay your fuckin' bills.
_________________
His wife buys a pair of crutchless knickers in an attempt to spice
up a dead sex-life. She puts them on, together with a short skirt
and sits on the settee. At strategic moments she crosses her legs …….
enough times till her husband says, "Are you wearing crutchless knickers?"
"Yes," she answers.
"Thank Christ for that. I thought the stuffing was coming out of the settee."
________________
A high-school student came home one night rather depressed.
"What's the matter, Son?" asked his mother.
"Aw, gee," said the boy, "It's my grades. They're all wet."
"What do you mean 'all wet?'"
"You know," he replied, "...below C-level."
_______________
A man and his wife, moved from Conroe , Texas to Mendenhall, MS .
The husband had a wooden leg, and to insure it back in Texas , it
cost them $2000. Per year!
When they arrived in Mendenhall, they went to an insurance agency to
see how much it would cost to insure his wooden leg.
The agent looked it up on the computer and said: '$39.'
The husband was shocked and asked why it was so cheap here in
Mendenhall to insure it because it cost him $2000 in Texas.
The insurance agent turned his computer screen to the couple and
said, 'Well, here it is on the screen, it says: Any wooden
structure, with a sprinkler system above it, is $39... You just have
to know how to describe it!'
_______________
BUFFALO Bill
Blonde Arm Wrestling
http://www.buffaloschips.com/012808.htm
Blonde That Started It All
http://www.buffaloschips.com/012809.htm
Boy And His Train
http://www.buffaloschips.com/012810.htm
______________
FUN PAGES from Lorraine
Negotiating a Real Piece of Work
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jhgtgf.htm
New Energy Drink
http://www.buffaloschips.com/hfhgtf.htm
New Guy In Prison
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jhtgtr.htm
______________
SYDESJOKES LIST
Passed Out
http://www.sydesjokes.com/link2/link001685.html
Salmon Commercial
http://www.sydesjokes.com/link2/link001686.html
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FREOM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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