THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
Congress is where a man gets up to speak,
says nothing, nobody listens,
- and then everybody disagrees.
_____________
GOOD MONING POSTMAN FANS!
Monday, back to work. Well, at least for some of you lucky folks
out there. The war department woke up and said, "Gee, I wish
I didn't have to go to work. I woke up and said, "Gee. I
wish I could go to work." Funny thing, why is it you always
wish for a different lot in life? oh well. The remodling project
is finished! That is a good thing. Son is getting tired of
camping out on the living room floor. Everything is done in
his bedroom. Now all we have to do is go to the carpet store and
get some carpet for the floor, and he will be able to move back
in. Seems like it has taken forever. But at least that is behind
us now. The upstairs is a mess. Everything in his room, we moved
out in the hall, my daughter's bedroom, and our bedroom, leaving
very little room to manuever around through the junk. Now comes
the challenge of putting things back together again.
Normal is a good thing.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
___________
THE COMICS
booby traps
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g010.html
killed in a plane crash
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g011.html
they taste the same
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g012.html
mammary
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g013.html
a lady's revenge
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g014.html
a skid mark
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g015.html
new drive thru
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g016.html
braless
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g017.html
the vendor
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/g018.html
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LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
there's something funny going on
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5677.html
Mulsons
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5678.html
Momma's boobs
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5679.html
the natural alternative
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5680.html
life does you favors
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5681.html
bind date
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5682.html
_____________
Steve and Fred went to the fair. They came across a
small crowd gathered around a stall and went over to
take a look.
"What's going on?" Steve asked one of the crowd.
"We're watching to see if some idiot can ride that
bronco machine," he said nodding towards a fearsome
looking machine. "Nobody has managed to stay on for
the full three minutes yet. And there's a prize of $1000
for anybody who can.
"I can do that!" Steve said confidently.
"No you can't," said Fred.
"I sure as hell can!" said Steve.
"You'll get yourself killed if you try and ride that monster,"
said Ted.
"Watch this," said Steve and climbed aboard the bronco
machine. The machine thrashed wildly, up and down, from
side to side, around in circles but still a grim-faced Steve clung
to its back. After two minutes the machine was bucking almost
vertically and spinning until Fred was a blur. But when the three
minutes were up Steve was still on the machine's back
acknowledging the cheers and cries from the small crowd.
He dismounted, collected his winnings and rejoined Ted.
"Where in hell did you learn to ride a bucking bronco like that!?"
Fred asked. "Remember three months ago," Steve said...
"When your wife had whooping cough...?"
________
A blonde hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip
of her index finger shot off.
"How did this happen?" the emergency room doctor asked her.
Well, I was trying to commit suicide, she replied.
"What?" sputtered the doctor. "You tried to commit suicide by
shooting your finger off?" "No, Silly!" the blonde said.
"First I put the gun to my chest, and I thought: I just paid $6,000.00
for these breast implants, I'm not shooting myself in the chest."
"And then?" asked the doctor. "Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought:
I just paid $3000.00 to get my teeth straightened, I'm not shooting
myself in the mouth." "And then?"
"Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This is going to make a
loud noise. So I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the trigger."
_________
Phrases Men Wish Their Women Would Say
~ "Are you sure you've had enough to drink?"
~ "I have decided to stop wearing clothes around the house."
~ "I'm bored...let's shave my pussy."
~ "No, not the mall again! Let's try that new tittie bar instead!"
~ "Shouldn't you be down at the bar with your buddies?"
~ "Of course I'll swallow...I love your flavor!"
________
The woman was happily showing off her new mink coat.
"It was nice of your husband to buy you that fur coat,"
said her friend.
"He had to," replied the woman. "I caught him kissing
the maid." "How dreadful. Did you fire her?"
"No." She smiled. "I still need a new dress and purse."
____________
Q: How do you get a Democrat to pay taxes?
A: Nominate him/her for a position in Obama's cabinet.
Q: What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why
he no longer lived in Eden?
A: Your mother ate us out of house and home.
____________
A lady fixed her husband a special meal for his birthday.
After dinner she fixed him a pitcher of martinis then
poured him a drink. Then she left to pick up his favorite
dessert from the local bakery. When she returned from
her errand she found her husband, drink in hand, prancing
about the living room wearing her bra, panties and high
heels. "What the hell is going on!" she exclaimed.
Her husband got a quizzical look on his face and said
"What? You asked what I wanted for my birthday and I
told you. I wanted to eat, drink and........be Mary."
____________
BUFFALO BILL
M Rip It Up
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gnzxjzkaka.htm
The Flies In Florida Are Tough
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gajskks.htm
Dunk Shot
http://www.buffaloschips.com/ghsasjs.htm
_________
SYDESJOKES LIST
Hillary Book Signing
http://www.sydesjokes.com/link2/link001663.html
Golf Funnies
http://www.sydesjokes.com/link2/link001664.html
I Want Her
http://www.sydesjokes.com/link2/link001665.html
Good Quotes
http://www.sydesjokes.com/link2/link001666.html
__________
That's all folks
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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