[buffalos-adult-chips] Chips For 11-26-10

 



Adult Adult

Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.

Glenn has the watch.

Don't know how many of you were around right after WW11 but everywhere you
looked there was this big sign of a Sailor with a Sea Bag on his shoulder.
Above the poster was the words: JOIN THE NAVY AND SEE THE World. Well I
decided to take them up on it. I JOINED. I didn't get to see the WHOLE
world, but I did manage to see the biggest part of it.

Here is my story: MY FULLEST LIFE Thanksgiving Day, 2010.... I don't know
about all of you, but, I, myself, have so much to be thankful for.
As most of you know, I am losing my sight, in fact I only have less than
three percent vision right now. I am just thankful that I have that much.
I was asked the other day by a friend, "Do you resent losing your sight?"
Here is what I told him: Look, I don't believe there are very many people in
this world that have seen as much as I have. I enlisted in the Army at 17,
in 1943 was in England that same year. I saw all the English countryside
along with a whole lot of other guys on our daily 5 mile hike. After D-Day
we all took a stroll through the French countryside, up through Belgium and
into the Black Forest of Germany. After visiting a few major German cities,
we met the Russians at Torgau, Germany to end the war. Reenlisted in the
Army on December 7, 1945, came home, got married, then back to Germany until
1947. Discharged. Came home, tried to adjust to civilian life, but
couldn't find anything I wanted to do, so enlisted] in the Navy. Sent to
San Diego, Calif. to boot camp. Then to sea duty.sailed from San Diego on
my Birthday, February
15, 1949 for Tsingtao, China. Stopped off in Hawaii for a couple
days...Swam at Waikiki Beach, beautiful.
From the beach you could see Diamond Head, one of Hawaii's most famous
landmarks. On to Tsingtao.
After a few months there, we were ordered to Hong Kong to take the American
Legation from China, because the Communist were taking over. As we pulled
out of the Tsingtao Harbor we could see the shelling of the town Got out
just in time..Proceeded to Hong Kong where we were able to visit all the
lights there. I saw all the fantastic statues in the Tiger Balm Gardens..
Left Hong Kong on our way to Subic Bay in the Philippines. After that we
moved on to Manila for the Fourth of July.
Than back to Hawaii for a couple of days. Then back to San Diego. Made
another trip to the Far East in February
1950, but this time we went to Sasabo, Japan.. Back in the States, I was
ordered to the Pentagon in Washington, D. C. for a tour of duty there.
While in Washington, I visited just about every sight there was to see,
including the Washington Monument, Lincoln Memorial, Museum of Natural
History, the Smithsonian Institute, the Capital \ Building, and even spent
time at the Arlington National Cemetery. In 1953 I was ordered to the U.
S. Naval Attaché in Helsinki, Finland. From there I was able to go to
Lapland above the Aortic Circle, ride reindeer and get very, very cold.
While in Finland, I had the opportunity to visit Stockholm, Sweden, then on
to Copenhagen, Denmark, and to Oslo, Norway. Fantastic countries, wonderful
people. In Copenhagen, I visited the "Little Mermaid" in the harbor. While
in Helsinki, I was called upon to do some maintenance work on several crypto
machines in Berlin Germany, Moscow, Russia, Paris, France, and London,
England. While in Moscow, I stood before the Kremlin, walked in Red Square,
in Paris, I went to the top of the Eiffel Tower, rode a tour boat on the
Seine River, walked under the Arch de Triumph, Walked down the Champs de
Elise. In London, I watched the changing of the Guard at Buckingham Palace,
Walked in Hyde Park, visited Big Ben, took a ride on the Thames Next, I was
ordered to a Destroyer based at Norfolk, Va.
Departed Norfolk in August 1957, first drop, Iceland, next on to Amsterdam,
Holland, visited cheese factories, and lots, and lots of windmills. From
there we went to the Medeterrian, first stop Palma Majorca, in the Balearic
Islands. then to Barcelona, Spain, I really loved Spain. Then to Genoa,
Italy, then to Athens, Greece, then on to Istanbul, Turkey, then to Mersin,
Turkey, then to Ishmer, Turkey. Tour over, headed back to Norfolk..
Orders waiting for me to proceed to Madrid, Spain, to prepare to put a Naval
Magazine (Ammo Depot) in commission at Cartagena, Spain on the Med Coast.
After a few months in Madrid, then to Cartagena, got the Magazine in
operation, took time off to Visit Vienna, Austria, Rome, Italy, the French
Rivera, the Bavarian Alps, Switzerland, and Portugal. In 1962, I was
ordered to Patuxant River Naval Air station, where I completed my twenty and
retired on 14 December 1964. I will turn 82 this coming February, so you
can see that I do not resent losing my sight. There really isn't much left
in this world for me to see, that would be worth the effort. I have SO very
much to be thankful for on this Thanksgiving Day , I have my health, good
friends, a loving cat, comfortable living, REALLY.......just how much more
could a man ask for? Pretty good for a farm boy from Kentucky, don't ya
think??? Y'all have a wonderful day, and good cheer to all y'all.

Glenn

buffalo says Thank you for your service Glenn and sharing some of your life
with us.

A newsletter you may enjoy.

CIGARCLIPS

Funny TV or Film clips taken from around the world

To join send a blank e-mail to
cigarclips-subscribe@yahoogroups.com

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Harley Chips
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The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson, died and
went to heaven.

At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur. "Since you've been such a good man and
your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out
with anyone you want to in heaven."

Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, "I want to hang out with
God."

St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and introduced him to God.

God recognized Arthur and commented, "Okay, so you were the one who invented
the Harley-Davidson motorcycle?"

Arthur said, 'Yeah, that's me."

God commented: "Well, what's the big deal in inventing something that's
pretty unstable, makes noise and pollution, and can't run without a road?"

Arthur was a bit embarrassed, but finally spoke, "Excuse me, but aren't you
the inventor of woman?"

God said, "Ah, yes."

"Well," said Arthur, "professional to professional, you have some major
design flaws in your invention!"

1. There's too much inconsistency in the front-end suspension.
2. It chatters constantly at high speeds.
3. Most rear ends are too soft and wobble about too much.
4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust.
5. The maintenance costs are outrageous.

"Hmmmmm, you may have some good points there." replied God, "Hold on."

God went to his Celestial supercomputer, typed in a few words and waited for
the results. The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it.

"Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed," God said to Arthur, "but
according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours."

Stan Kegel

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Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait

dishonesty
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Shaved Chips
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Ron and Jan had started their retirement years and decided
to raise some extra cash by advertising for a lodger in their
two-up two-down terrace house.

After a few days an attractive young woman applies for the
room. She explains that she is a model working in a nearby
studio and needs the room for a few weeks.

Jan shows her the house and they agree to start straight
away.

"There's just one problem," explains the model. "Because of
my job I have to have a bath every night, and I notice you don't
have a bath."

"That's not a problem," repliesJan, "we have a tin bath out in
the yard and we bring it in to the living room, in front of the
fire, and fill it with hot water."

"What about your husband?" asks the model.

"Oh, he plays darts most weekdays, so he'll be out in the
evenings," replies Jan.

"Good," says the model, "that's settled. I'll go to the studio
and see you tonight."

That evening Ron dutifully goes to his darts match whilst Jan
prepares the bath for the model. After stripping off, the model
steps into the bath and Jan is amazed to see that she has
no pubic hair.

The model notices Jan's staring eyes, smiles and explains
that it is part of her job to shave herself especially when
modeling swim wear or underclothes.

Later when Ron returns, Jan relates this oddity and he does
not believe her.

"It's true, I tell you," says Jan. "Look, if you don't believe
me, tomorrow night I'll leave the curtains slightly open and
you can peek in and see for yourself."

The next night Ron leaves as usual and Jan prepares the
bath for the model. As the model steps naked into the bath,
Jan, standing behind her, looks towards the curtains, and
points towards the model's hairless crotch. Then she lifts
up her skirt and wearing no panties, points to her own hairy
thatch.

Later that evening, Ron returns and they retire to bed.

"Well, do you believe me now?" she asks Ron.

"Yes," he replies. "I've never seen anything like it in my life.
But, why did you lift up your skirt and show yours too?

"Just to show you the difference," answers Jan, "but anyway
you've seen me with no knickers on thousands of times."

"Yes," says Ron, "I have ... but the rest of the dart
team hasn't !!!

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Short Chips
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A Japanese study holds out the promise that stem cells from liposuction fat
could be used to increase women's breast size without the use of implants.
Today Congress called for a 30 percent increase in funding for stem cell
research.

Two men were overheard talking about the infidelities of an office Romeo.
"I don't know how he gets away with it," said one fellow.
"The only thing I've ever done behind my wife's back is to zip her up."

Q. How do you know when you're really a loser?

A. When a nymphomaniac says, "Let's just be friends

Mike picked up an attractive woman, named Linda, who flagged down his car in
a seedy part of town. As they rode, he asked her what she did for a living.

Linda winked at Mike and said, "I'm a magician."

"No way," Mike scoffed. 'Prove it."

So Linda touched him on the thigh, and "Poof" Mike turned into a hotel.

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Date Chips
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A certain virginal and shy college freshman was lucky to have a roommate who
was considerably more experienced. When the bashful boy broke down and
explained his predicament, his roommate was quick to offer to set him up
with a blonde who'd made the rounds of the campus.

Just take this bimbo out to dinner and a show, and then let nature take its
course, he explained reassuringly. This girl knows what the score is, and
she's even a natural blonde.

The roommate arranged the date as promised. The freshman was delighted by
his cute, outgoing companion and they spent the evening dining and dancing.
On the way home he parked his car in a dark lane, broke out in a cold sweat,
and blurted out, "Gosh, I sure would love to have a little pussy."

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Short Chips
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Two lesbians walk into a House of Ill
Repute.

They ask for the youngest woman in
the joint.

The Madam says that she will not allow
the youngest girl any time with them.

The lesbians make the demand again,
"We want the youngest girl here!"

The madam says, "No. I don't serve
minors to lickers."

~~~~

Tammy bought a new book recently entitled
"What Twenty Million American Women Want."

Seeing the title, Doug grabbed the book out
of her hand and started thumbing through the pages.

Astonished and not just a little bit irritated, Tammy
stared up at him and said, "What in the world are
you doing?"

Doug replies, "I just want to see if they've got my
name spelled right."

~~~~

What do people mean when they say their computer went
down on them?

~~~~

The bride-to-be and her best friend were discussing her impending
wedding.

"If you want an unforgettable wedding night," her friend
said, "get him to eat a dozen oysters after the ceremony."

A week after, the new bride thanked her friend but said plaintively,

"Only eight of the oysters worked."

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LynnLynn's Links
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Subscribers and Friends

Melva/In The Shadow
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/Insp/Sha.html

Brother Bob's Poems Of The Week:
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Attitude Is Everything 2!
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Okay, everyone is telling me that I'm an insane millionaire who must
have gone absolutely crazy for doing this today and tomorrow,
especially on Thankgiving of all days, but I don't care anymore
because I think it's just the right thing to do.

Okay, let me catch my breathe while I type this because you're not
going to believe this...First off, thank you so much for taking a
minute to read this, my name is Justin Blake, and I'm a millionaire
that was dared to do something insane tonight and tomorrow morning,
and if you're interested in knowing what it is then read below, but
you'll need to hurry because you may only have a few minutes to take
advantage of this:

As part of an insane marketing test, I'm giving away my Online
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morning.....so you need to get your copy today if you want one.

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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)

Email Header Info via Martha
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Smaller and Talks ! IPOD Shuffle
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An A-Z Index of the Bash command line for Linux
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Movie Links

Bob & Tom Around The World Series
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Boob Job
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Borrowing The Old Mans Car
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Jet Engine
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John McCain
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Korean
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Larry The Cable Guy 111
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Short Chips
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When one of the two first-grade teachers at the posh suburb's new school
left on her two-week honeymoon, the other volunteered to teach both classes
in her absence. A few weeks later, at a housewarming party given by the
newlyweds, the guests were somewhat taken aback as the groom introduced them
to his wife's teaching colleague: "And this, ladies and gentlemen,"
announced the grateful husband, "is the lovely lady who substituted for my
wife during our honeymoon."

Jill was talking to her hair stylist. "It's silly," she said, "but my
daughter has some sort of crazy idea about losing her hair." "What do you
mean?" the beautician asked. "Well, I overheard her on the phone the other
day telling her best friend that she hoped she'd be 'balled' soon."

Stan Kegel

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Toon Chips
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Disgusting
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Bob Barker
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Forty Beavs
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Cats In Heat
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What Happened
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Have Some!
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Limerick Chips
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Snow White was desperate for a fuck
she went to the woods to try her luck.

She'd almost given up looking,
when she saw some chimney smoke,
then she stumbled on the cottage,
and went in for a poke.

Her clothes came off in seconds.
and she'd just removed her pants,
when seven dwarfs came marching in,
with a merry song and dance.

Snow White just stood there speechless,
and thought she was in heaven,
originally after one good shag,
but now she could have seven.

Straight away she took command,
"My fanny needs a lick!"
And when one dwarf moved forward,
she said "Oi-you'd better drop your pick"

So down he went onto all fours,
and said "I ain't licking that",
"Not there, that is my arse-hole,
you DOPEY little brat!"

The next dwarf started blushing,
"Do we have to do it here?"
Snow White said "Don't be BASHFUL,
unless you're a fucking queer"

So reluctantly he whipped it out,
to prove he was no fool,
and Snow White gave a big "Heigh-Ho",
as she rode upon his tool.

Now one dwarf wasn't smiling,
'cos he hadn't had a sniff,
and due to his impatience,
he couldn't raise a stiff.

"Relax, you GRUMPY bastard",
so he did as he was told,
and as soon as he was hard enough,
he shot his fucking load.

The next dwarf got a blow-job,
and she took him deep quite easy,
but she just avoided brain-damage,
when he sneezed, she called him SNEEZY.

With three dwarfs left she turned and said,
"You're next, I want your knob!"
But no sooner than he had entered her,
and he was sleeping on the job.

"Wake up you SLEEPY bastard",
she wanted more from him,
and he woke with such excitement,
that he filled her hairy quim.

The next dwarf rammed his up her,
and shagged her fanny raw,
a dazed Snow White them whimpered.
"That should be against the law."

He made poor Snow White tremble,
he was so big and thick.
"No wonder you're so HAPPY,
with that fucking great big prick"

With one dwarf still remaining,
but feeling rather sore,
she said "You'll have to use your tongue,
my twat can't take no more!"

And so he put his tongue to work,
where others had placed their cocks,
and 'cos he made Snow White feel better,
she named the last dwarf DOC.

Now Snow White couldn't do much,
with all that cum inside her quim,
so she grabbed a cup, and squatted,
and filled it to the brim.

So there's the truth about the dwarfs,
and how they got their names,
by satisfying Miss Snow White,
and joining in her games.

There's one more thing you need to know,
and that's - What happened to that cup,
well think of what you're drinking,
when you next buy 7-Up

Ross

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Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hot off the press wire...Nancy Pelosi flies Southwest airlines.

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She'll be flying Southwest from now on because."Bags fly free."

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Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Katie's Komfort Kolumn

Vol 1929 Chest Bumps When BJ was loading the pickup, the dogs were outside.

They realized what was going on. They were getting more and more excited as
the pickup got more and more full.

BJ looked over and saw Katie and Sandi jump into the air and do a chest
bump.

BJ: Naah, it was just a happenstance.

He continues his work and looks over and the dogs jump into the air a second
time and give each other a second chest bump.

BJ: Okay, once is happenstance, twice.well. BJ: Hey guys where did you learn
to bump each other in the chest?

Sandi: You watch sports right?

BJ: Right.

Katie: Where are we when you watch sports?

BJ: Either on my lap or right next to me.

Sandi: Soooooo.

BJ: So you picked up of the television?

Katie: Sandi, father is a little slow today..

The herd

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Adult Adult

*********************************************

Remember 9/11/01

Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list

In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:

William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783

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Nov. 14 - Target debuts ‘weirdly hot’ Santa | Tide’s social-first NFL marketing strategy

Why Tide is shifting to social-first marketing for its latest NFL blitz; McDonald’s holiday cups entertain with Doodles ...