Plants gone potty!: [PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner

A tramp who had tramped many miles along a rough
outback track came to a small pub named 'George and
the Dragon' and made his way around the back
in search of a handout. Before he had time to ask,
the publican's wife came on the scene and gave the
tramp the greatest verbal thrashing of his life.
She called him a lazy good for nothing loafer and
added if he was hoping to get even a crust of bread
he could forget it. The tramp heard her out in silence,
then just stood there. "Well," she snapped, "now what
is it you want?" "I was wondering," said the man,
"if I could have a word with George?"
__________

Old Mendel Rugelbaum was very old and suffering from
a rare disease and his doctor told him he could drink
only human milk. "How can I get human milk?" Mendel
asked the doctor. "Well, Ruby Finkelstein's just had a
baby, maybe she'll help." So every day Mendel went to
Ruby's house for his daily feed. Ruby was a dark eyed,
big breasted lady, who, in spite of herself, gradually
became aroused as Mendel lapped at her ripe breasts.
One day as he quietly lay sucking, she whispered to him,
"Tell me Mr.Rugelbaum, do you like it?"
"Mmmm, wonderful," he sighed.
"Is there," she hesitated, her lips parted, eyes aglow,
"is there anything else you'd like?"
"As a matter of fact there is," murmured Mendel
"What?" Ruby asked breathlessly.
Mendel licked his lips. "Maybe a little cookie?"
___________

"Hey, bartender," says a customer, sitting at the bar.
"What kind of bird is that sitting on the perch?"
"Oh," says Bob the bartender, "that's a Crunchy Bird!"
"I never heard of a Crunchy Bird," says the patron.
"Just watch," says Bob. He takes a newspaper off the bar
and throws it down on the floor, then he turns to the
bird and says, "Crunchy Bird, my paper!" The bird swoops
down and attacks the newspaper. He rips it to shreds until
there's nothing left but tiny pieces of confetti.
"Wow," says the customer, "can I try?"
"Be my guest," the bartender replies.
The customer takes off his shoe and puts it on the bar
and says, "Crunchy Bird, my shoe!" The bird flies down off
the perch and picks the shoe up with his beak. He slams
the shoe down on the bar and starts attacking it. In no
time, the shoe is reduced to nothing but behind the bar.
Suddenly a tough looking guy walks into the bar. He yells,
"Gimme a drink NOW!"
He looks around the bar snarling and yells at the patrons,
"What the Hell are you clowns looking at?"
The bar is completely silent. Then the bully notices the
bird and says, "What the Hell kind of stupid looking bird is that?"
"That's a Crunchy Bird," says bartender Bob.
The tough guy laughs and yells, "Crunchy Bird, my ass!"
____________

A 72-year-old man goes for a physical. All of his tests
come back with normal results. The doctor says, 'Jerry,
everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and
emotionally? Are you at peace with God?'
Jerry replies, 'God and I are tight. He knows I have poor
eyesight, so he's fixed it for when I get up in the middle
of the night to go to the bathroom, *poof*!, the light
goes on. When I'm done, *poof*!, the light goes off.'
'Wow, that's incredible,' the doctor says.
A little later in the day, the doctor calls Jerry's wife.
'Ginger,' he says, 'Jerry is doing fine but I had to call
you because I'm in awe of his relationship with God. Is it
true that he gets up during the night and *poof *!,
the light goes on in the bathroom, and when he's done,
*poof*! the light goes off?'
'OH MY GOD!' Ginger exclaims.
'He's peeing in the fridge again!!!!'

BUFFALO BILL

High Blood Pressure
http://www.buffaloschips.com/dgsjhagj.htm

How Far Will A Condom Stretch
http://www.buffaloschips.com/shjasj.htm

How A Blonde Pole Dances
http://www.buffaloschips.com/sdsa.htm

THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman

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Plants gone potty!

[PostmansCorner] The Postman's Corner

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