Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
Let's take a look at who we know that was born this month.
November
1. Jenny McCarthy, Lyle Lovett, Dave Nutting
2. Burt Lancaster, James Polk
3. Dennis Miller, Larry Holmes, Roseanne
4.Walter Cronkite, Will Rogers, Laura Bush
5. Bryan Adams, Tatum O'Neal, Doris Miller
6. Sally Field, Maria Shriver, Harvey Holland
7. Billy Graham, Joni Mitchell
8. Bonnie Raitt, Morley Safer
9. Bob Gibson, Carl Sagan
10. Richard Burton, Sinbad
11. Leonardo DiCaprio, Demi Moore, George Patton
12. Neil Young, Sammy Sosa, Al Michaels
13. Whoopi Goldberg, Robert Louis Stephenson
14. Prince Charles, Boutros Boutros-Ghali, Claude Monet
15. Ed Asner, Sam Waterson, Darlene Klingensmith
16. Dwight Gooden, Burgess Meredith
17. Tom Seaver, Danny DeVito, Lorne Michaels
18. Alan Shepard, Linda Evans
19. Ted Turner, Meg Ryan, Kerri Strug, Debbie Radice
20. Robert F. Kennedy, Bo Derek
21. Ken Griffey Jr., Goldie Hawn, Elaine Ribordy
22. Jan White , Rodney Dangerfield, Jamie Lee Curtis
23. Billy the Kid, Boris Karloff, Jim Mcquain
24. Dale Carnegie, Scott Joplin
25. John F. Kennedy Jr., Joe DiMaggio
26. Tina Turner, Shawn Kemp
27. Jimmie Hendrix, Zoey Tyree, Bruce Lee, Anne Pitts
28. Judd Nelson, Randy Newman, Dianne Lyall
29. Howie Mandell, Vin Scully
30. Dick Clark, Mark Twain, Marilyn From Ohio, Sandra Brabant
Another election day over with and hopefully when all of the smoke clears
tomorrow there will be no recalls or prolonged challenges. I am not totally
displeased to see Jerry Brown reelected to Governor of Calif. He started
a program in California that said if you were going to draw a welfare check
you were going to work. He had people picking up garbage and babysitting
children as a job. I don't know what the problem was that caused the program
to end, probably high administrative costs, but it didn't last.
The big problem in his administration was the Mediterranean Fruit
Fly Scandal. California's Fruit crops were being threatened by the
Med Fly. If they couldn't control it, exports would be banned. Jerry
ordered spraying over much of Los Angeles to stop the spread of the
fly. I don't care if they sprayed water there would still be a flood of
lawsuits and with insecticides every lawyer was going to get super-rich.
At the time I guess he just wasn't liberal enough for his party and
loss the next race.
California is saying good-bye to Arnold and we are saying good-bye to
Jenny.We now have a self-proclaimed businessman and nerd as a
Governor. I wish him good luck. We need jobs and if he can find them
he may get re-elected.
Enjoy the chips.... buffalo
A Newsletter You may enjoy.
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Short Chips
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An English major was being released from prison. The nice looking female
clerk was about to give him the $100.00 they give to all released prisoners.
Since the inmate had not had female attention for a long time, he suggested
that she could keep the money if she would have sex with him. He was
immediately rearrested and thrown back into jail. Everybody knows you
should never end a sentence with a proposition.
Mary Jane's mother screamed, "Your father will kill you when he finds out
that you set the garage on fire!" Mary Jane just laughed and laughed,
because she knew her father was trapped in the garage.
Mary Jane was scooting up the flagpole at school. The teacher cried out,
"Mary Jane get down! The boys can see your panties!" Mary Jane just laughed
and laughed. She knew she wasn't wearing any.
While on a date in a dark movie theatre, Mary Jane's date slipped his hand
down her bra. Mary Jane just laughed and laughed. She knew she kept her
money hidden in her shoe.
What is FOREPLAY?
1- The loving before the shoving.
2- The petting before the getting.
3- BULLSHIT!
4 -The licking before the pricking.
5- The stroking before the poking.
6- The procrastination & masturbation preceding penetration.
7- The lingering and the fingering.
8- A premature ejaculators nightmare!
9- Unnecessary with barn animals.
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Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
doggie goes swimming
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/371.html
THE ULTIMATE DRUNK PEOPLE COMPILATION VIDEO EVER!!!
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Dancin' The Boogie - Silvan Zingg (piano), Will & Maéva
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/373.html
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Car Chips
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David and Bernice had just given their teenage daughter family-car
privileges. On Saturday night she returned home very late from a
party.
The next morning her father went out to the driveway to
get the newspaper and came back into the house frowning.
At 11:30am the girl sleepily walked into the kitchen,
and her father asked her, "Sweetheart, what time did you
get in last night?"
"Not too late, Dad." she replied nervously.
Dead-panned, her father said, "Then, my precious one,
I'll have to talk with the paperboy about putting my
paper under the front tire of the car."
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Thanksgiving Chips
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You are cordially invited for Thanksgiving dinner, but first here are a few
rules:
As a reminder, I will print and give a copy to each guest that enters.
10 RULES FOR THANKSGIVING DINNER AT MY HOUSE.
1. Don't get in line asking questions about the food. "Who made the potato
salad? Is there egg in there? Are the greens fresh? Is the meat in the
greens turkey or pork? Who made the macaroni and cheese?
What kind of pie is that? Who made it? Ask one more question and I will
punch you in your mouth, knocking out all your fronts so you won't be able
to eat anything!
2. If you can't walk or are missing any limbs, sit down until someone makes
your plate for you. Dinner time is not the time for you to start trying to
be independent. Nibble on the pecans and walnuts to hold you over until
someone makes you a plate.
3. If you have kids under the age of twelve, I will escort them to the
basement and bring their food down to them. They are not gonna tear my
house up this year. Tell them that they are not allowed upstairs until it's
time for Uncle Butchie to start telling family stories about their mommas
and papas.
4. There is going to be one prayer for Thanksgiving dinner! JUST ONE! We
do not care that you are thankful that your 13 year old daughter gave birth
to a healthy baby or your nephew just got out of jail. Save that talk for
somebody who gives a hoot. PS. The time limit for the prayer is one
minute.
5. Finish everything on your plate before you go up for seconds! If you
don't, you will be cursed out and asked to keep your greedy butt home next
year!
6. BRING YOUR OWN TUPPERWARE!! Don't let me catch you fixing yourself a
plate using my good Tupperware knowing good and well that I will never see
it again! Furthermore, if you didn't bring anything over, don't let me
catch you making a plate period. or there will be a misunderstanding!
7. What you came with is what you should leave with!! Do not leave my
house with anything that doesn't belong to you. EVERYBODY WILL BE SUBJECTED
TO A BODY SEARCH COMING AND GOING OUT OF MY DOMAIN!!!
8. Do not leave your kids so you can go hopping from house to house.
This is not a DAYCARE CENTER! There will be a kid-parent roll call every
ten minutes. If any parent is not present during roll call, your child will
be put outside until you come and get him or her.
After 24 hours, I will call DHS on you.
9. BOOK YOUR HOTEL ROOM BEFORE YOU COME INTO TOWN!! There will be no
sleeping over at my house! You are to come and eat dinner and take your
behind home or to your hotel room. EVERYBODY GETS KICKED OUT AT
11:00 PM. You will get a 15 minute warning bell ring.
10. Last but not least! ONE PLATE PER PERSON!! This is not a soup
kitchen. I am not trying to feed your family until Christmas dinner!
You will be supervised when you fix your plate. There will be a cash
register at the door. Anything over the appropriate amount will be charged
to you before you leave. Thanks to Cousin Alfred and his greedy family, we
installed a credit card machine! So VISA and MASTERCARD are now being
accepted. NO FOOD STAMPS OR ACCESS CARDS JUST YET!
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Bare Lifts - Invisible Bra Support
Bare Lifts is the invisible solution to a naturally perky look. Wear them
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Bare Lifts works on all cup sizes A-D and you can forget spending hundreds
on specialty bras and lift systems.
Buy 1, Get 1 on us - order today.
Learn More
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Garage Chips
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A curious little boy asks his mom what his younger sister has between the
legs; the young mother does not know how to explain to the boy, so she says:
"It's like the Garage..."
The boy then asks: "What is mine called?"
"It's called the Car..." the mother replies.
A few days later, the phone rings while the parents are "busy" in the
bedroom; the little boy answers it. It's his dad's friend: "Is your father
home? Could I speak to him?"
"Yes, but he's busy", the boy replies. "What's he doing? I wanna talk to
him..." "Wait, let me check..." The boy looks through the bedroom keyhole;
then comes back and says: "He's putting the Car in the Garage "Ok, I'll call
back..." A short while later, the man calls back:
"Can I talk to your dad now?" "He's still busy..."
"What? What's he doing? How long does it take him to put the car in the
garage anyway?"
"Wait, let me check..." The boy, again, looks through the bedroom keyhole,
comes back and has this to tell his dad's friend: "He's still trying to put
the Car in the Garage; he keeps moving the Car back and forth. He seems to
have problem putting the rear wheels of the Car into the Garage..."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Candy Chips
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Top Ten LEAST POPULAR HALLOWEEN CANDIES
<via Sandy and from the Late Show with David Letterman>
10. Bit-O-Monkey
9. Lice Krispie Treats
8. Good N' Clammy
7. Malted Meat Balls
6. Mullahmars
5. They-Might-Be-Raisinets
4. Al Gore's Melted Sno-Caps
3. No No. 3 - writer out trick-or-treating
2. Mr. Goodbar Who Used To Be Mrs. Goodbar
1. Tootsie Roids
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HIP REPLACEMENT RECALL CENTER
Thousands of Hips have been recalled due to failure!
If you or a loved one have used this product and experienced adverse
effects, you may be eligible for compensation.
Follow here and get a Free Private Case Evaluation:
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LynnLynn's Links
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If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com
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Subscribers and Friends
Melva/Coming Soon
http://silverandgoldandthee.net/V/A/Co.html
Where Do You Go
http://www.carolspoetry.com/wheredo.html
carolyn w/ Stand By Me ~Elvis
http://carolynspreciousmemories.com/elvis/standbyme.html
Fragile Heart
http://www.reflectionsofsouthbreeze.com/Pages/fragileheart.htm
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
Now It's Your Turn To SCOOP UP some cash.
Wireless companies have accidentally stumbled and "opened up" an
impressive income opportunity to grab during the worst economy we've
seen in over 50 years.
And here's everything they don't want you to know...
http://buffaloschips.com/scoop
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Surfin Surfari
Virtual Aircraft Museum Via Dianne
http://tinyurl.com/2atwrsw
Merriam-Webster Online Via Dianne
http://www.merriam-webster.com/
High Tech Toys
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/techtoys.html
Armed Forces Tribute
http://home.insightbb.com/~armedforcestribute/
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Okay, everyone is telling me that I'm an insane millionaire who must
have gone absolutely crazy for doing this today and tomorrow,
especially on Thankgiving of all days, but I don't care anymore
because I think it's just the right thing to do.
Okay, let me catch my breathe while I type this because you're not
going to believe this...First off, thank you so much for taking a
minute to read this, my name is Justin Blake, and I'm a millionaire
that was dared to do something insane tonight and tomorrow morning,
and if you're interested in knowing what it is then read below, but
you'll need to hurry because you may only have a few minutes to take
advantage of this:
As part of an insane marketing test, I'm giving away my Online
Business Kit, but I'm only giving it away this today and tomorrow
morning.....so you need to get your copy today if you want one.
Press here to get your copy:
http://buffaloschips.com/kit
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Tutorials Via Martha
http://www.top-windows-tutorials.com/
Thanksgiving and Turkey Animated gifs
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/agifs_p-t.html
Freeware Via Wesley
http://tinyurl.com/5b9ke
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Listen, you will have no one but yourself to blame if you don't go
on an intimate date this weekend with a beautiful single woman or
man! NO ONE BUT YOURSELF TO BLAME!!!
Why will we blame you? Because we are giving away memberships to our
ADULTS ONLY dating community this week....and you can get one right
now for no cost...but we will not be giving them away forever.
PRESS HERE to meet single women or men this week for an intimate
date:
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Animal World
Doggie Zone
http://members.tripod.com/~JuleenW/DogHouse.html
Why God Gave Us Pets
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/gpets.html
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We understand that you may have accidentally deleted important
documents, pictures, or other various files from your computer that
you thought you could never get back.
Well, we wanted to let you know that you can easily get your deleted
pictures, documents, or files back today using a program called File
R/D.
You can easily try File R/D right now, for no cost, to run a -free-
analysis scan that will allow you to view deleted pictures, files,
documents, etc... Once you have complete the -free- analysis scan
you will be amazed by what you see! In fact, you will even see what
other people have deleted from your computer.
Once the scanning is complete you will have full control over which
files you want to recover.
Press here to run the -free- analysis scan:
http://buffaloschips.com/restore
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Movie Links
Midgey
http://www.buffaloschips.com/abjhuh.htm
Momma Is Santa
http://www.buffaloschips.com/agfrtt.htm
Morning Peepers
http://www.buffaloschips.com/adfgff.htm
Moshonov
http://www.buffaloschips.com/afgftt.htm
Mother's Day
http://www.buffaloschips.com/acvcff.htm
Moulin Huge
http://www.buffaloschips.com/avfvfff.htm
Love 2008
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gshsjjs.htm
Love Boat
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gshsjsdh.htm
Lucha
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gshkksj.htm
Luckiest Man On The Planet
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gshshjs.htm
Lucky 1
http://www.buffaloschips.com/gshsjs.htm
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Economy Chips
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JUST HOW BAD IS IT?
The economy is so bad that I got a pre-declined credit card in the
mail.
It's so bad, I ordered a burger at McDonalds and the kid behind the
counter asked, "Can you afford fries with that?"
The economy is so bad that CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
The economy is so bad if the bank returns your check marked
"Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or
them.
The economy is so bad Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading
higher than GM.
The economy is so bad parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies
and learned their children's names.
The economy is so bad a truckload of Americans was caught sneaking
into Mexico.
The economy is so bad Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.
The economy is so bad Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore.
The economy is so bad the Mafia is laying off judges.
The economy is so bad Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
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Toon Chips
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Aol Toilet
http://www.buffaloschips.com/ilugl.htm
apple
http://www.buffaloschips.com/fhrgh9.htm
apples
http://www.buffaloschips.com/hjkhkkjkvk,xv.htm
appointment
http://www.buffaloschips.com/hhhwiehkadn.htm
arab blowup doll
http://www.buffaloschips.com/hfhjfnf.htm
arab get oil
http://www.buffaloschips.com/jjfjfjfs.htm
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BedBug Out - Don't Let the Bedbugs BiteReduce Bedbugs and other pests
in as soon as 2 weeks. Rid your home of pests, dust mites and bedbugs
quick and without harmful chemicals.
View Web Version
http://buffaloschips.com/bedbu
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Limerick Chips
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The lady wasn't even in the mood
The first time she saw a man nude,
When asked if she'd like sex
Thought it couldn't be complex
And just sat on what she saw protrude
Said Mary, "I do beg your pardon,
But I once had a tree in my garden,
With a trunk long and thick,
But I have to admit,
'Twas nothing, compared to John's hard'un..."
A girl who hiked o'er the land
Once showed me a trick with her hand.
She zipped down her pants,
Adjusted her stance,
And peed out my name in the sand!
It's easy to please young Miss Flattery,
She wants not a hat from the hattery,
Nor shoes alligator,
But for her vibrator,
She's thrilled with the gift of a battery.
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Fushigi - Magic Gravity Ball
Mesmerize the mind and confuse the senses. Fushigi is an incredible,
therapeutic form of relaxation. The art of maneuvering a clear, reflective
sphere through mind and body isolation and manipulation creates the illusion
that the sphere is moving on its own.
Everyone loves the art of Fushigi.
Learn More
http://buffaloschips.com/fushi
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Parting Chips
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A Greek Restaurant owner daily teased his Chinese neighbor whenever he met
him, "How much is the flied lice today?"
The Chinese restaurant owner would fume and walk back into his restaurant
and decided to avoid the Greek owner. One day the Chinese owner decides to
go for speech lessons and after three months of intense learning decides to
confront the Greek with his new skill.
When the Greek sees the Chinese owner he asks the usual question "How much
is the flied lice?"
The Chinese replies confidently: "It is not flied lice, It is fried rice,
you Gleek plick!!!!"
?
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The Emery Cat is The Fun New Kitty Scratcher That Actually Grooms Cats Claws
While They Play! The secret is the patented honeycomb surface that works
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Your package includes:
Durable Base with built in catnip
Cute, playful kitty toy
Packet of catnip
Bonus De-shedder
Buy 1 get 1 FREE Now for only $19.95 plus youll receive the Bonus Gift
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http://buffaloschips.com/emcat
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Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
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Adult Adult
*********************************************
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list
In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:
William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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