THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
A lie gets halfway around the world before the
truth has a chance to get its pants on.
Sir Winston Churchill
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GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
FROM:THE INVESTIGATIVE REPORTS BUREAU OF
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
SW Airlines has recently had a rash of issues
with bird strikes on planes. Spokesmen for the
airline say that this has accounted for a number
of crashes and they are taking steps to correct
the problem. They announced a
NEW PLAN TO HELP WITH BIRD STRIKES ON PLANES!!!
They say this will work better than a scare crow!
finally....someplace to put Nancy Pelosi where she
might do some good!
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
___________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
flappin in the wind
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5858.html
they're important
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5859.html
the cat and the parrot
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pinguins
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Robin Williams
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5862.html
Aussie taxi cab driver
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5863.html
______________
THE COMICS
take four tablets
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/l001.html
hell no
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too much
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vroom
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go ahead and leave
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/l005.html
I don't mind
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/l006.html
Groucho Marx says...
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/l007.html
A woman from France is touring in the United States when
she develops a serious case of the crabs. She decides
to go to a pharmacy and get some medicine for her cond-
ition. Her English is not very good and she tells the
pharmacist, "I vould like some medicine that geet reed
of bugs in de bush."
The pharmacist misunderstood her and told her to go over
to section with lawn care products and select one of the
strong insecticides. The French woman did as she was
instructed and bought one of these products.
In a week she was back in the pharmacy again and talking
to the pharmacist. He asked her if her condition was
cleared up. "Why yes, eet is," she replied. "In fact all
of de bugs in de bush are gone. My hair down there, eets
gone too. And Pierre's moustache---eet's also gone!"
______________
Mary: I'm sorry I'm a bit late! My cab driver almost
had a wreck getting me here!
Jill: What happened?
Mary: The driver in front of him started to go when
the light turned green, but he slammed on the
brakes to look at a gal on the sidewalk who was
wearing a mini-skirt. My driver almost hit him in
the rear!
Jill: My goodness! How short was the skirt?
Mary: Well, she was wearing blue panties!
_______________
On my first day working at the gas station, I watched
a senior co-worker measure the level of gasoline in the
underground tanks by lowering a giant measuring stick
down into them.
"What would happen if I threw a lit match into the hole?"
I joked.
"It would go out," he replied very matter-of-factly.
"Really?" I asked, surprised to hear that. "Is there a lack
of oxygen down there or some safety device that would
extinguish it before the fumes ignited?"
"No," my co-worker continued. "The force from the explosion
would blow out the match."
______________
Q. What's the Cuban National Anthem?
A. Row, Row, Row Your Boat
Q. Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A. A different bar
Q. What did the Chinese couple name their retarded baby?
A. Sum Ting Wong
Q. What do you call it when an Italian has one arm
shorter than the other?
A. A speech impediment
Q. What does it mean when the Post Office's flag is flying at half-mast?
A. They're hiring
Q. Why aren't there any Hispanics on Star Trek?
A. Because they're not going to work in the future either.
_____________
A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license. He says
"Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered "Well, I have contacts."
The policeman replied "I don't care who you know! You're getting a ticket!"
______________
Driving to work, a gentlman had to swerve to avoid a box that
fell out of a truck in front of him. Seconds later, a policeman
pulled him over for reckless driving. Fortunately, another
officer had seen the carton in the road. The policmen stopped
traffic and recovered the box. It was found to contain
large upholstery tacks. "I'm sorry sir," the first trooper told the driver,
"but I am still going to have to write you a ticket."
Amazed, the driver asked for what.
The trooper replied, "Tacks evasion."
______________
BUFFALO Bill
Saddam The Unseen Video
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Santa Shopping
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Saudi
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Schweaty Balls
http://www.buffaloschips.com/kslls.htm
______________
SYDESJOKES LIST
American Visitor
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/toon1/000034.html
THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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