THE POSTMAN'S CORNER Laughter is to life what shock absorbers are to automobiles. It won't take the potholes out of the road, but it sure makes the ride smoother.  The TITAN Peeler - The World's Best Peeler! The Titan Peeler is the world's best peeler. Made of long lasting, dishwasher safe Stainless steel it has no equal. Long lasting blades help cut vegetables quickly and easily and slice both hard and soft cheese perfectly, every time. Each Peeler has dual action motion to cut the peeling time in-half. Don't waste anymore time! Order yours today! http://www.thepostm  Carleton Sheets, a nationally known Real Estate educator, is offering his new online course Real Profit $ in Real Estate - a $250 Value - for Free! Since 1983, nearly 3 million people got their start in Real Estate investing thanks to Carleton Sheets. Now he is going to help YOU do the same! For the 1st Time EVER, the Professional Education Institute® (PEI) is offering our proven Real Estate investing programs to you online absolutely FREE! The same company that introduced Real Estate expert Carleton Sheets is unveiling an all-inclusive website dedicated to Real Estate. There are no charges or hidden fees. http://www.thepostm  NESTLE Pure Life Bottled Water - FREE*! NESTLE Pure Life. Pure Water for Your Pure Satisfaction! If you've got a thirst for life, get a taste of NESTLE PURE LIFE water. NESTLE Pure Life gives you refreshing, purified water enhanced with a unique balance of minerals. It's the refined, crisp-tasting bottled water than only NESTLE brand can bring you! Get your FREE* 24-Pack of NESTLE Pure Life Water now while suplies last. http://www.thepostm  3-Pack FREE*! Choose your dog's favorite flavor: Be a true best friend and treat your dog to NEW MILK-BONE GRILLIN' BITES Chewy Dog Treats! Your chicken or bacon'n cheese loving dog will wag its tail for the chewy texture & mouth-watering flavor of Milk Bone Grillin' Bites. Get 3 FREE* bags of this pooch-pleasing treat in Chicken Drumstix or Bacon & Cheese Flavor. Grillin' Bites are just the right size for training and loaded with that real meat taste dogs of all sizes love. http://www.thepostm I was watching CNN the other day as they talked about the economic crisis. Bailouts for the banks. Now its a bailout for the auto industry. I wonder how many bailouts there will be before this is all finished? There is no talk of bailouts for other major industries. If you are a farmer, you might ask Congress why there is no bailout plan for such companies as John Deer. It gives me pause to ask a couple questions. And I'm not hearing the news networks asking them. surely in a time of economic crisis, we are going to have to allow some companies to fail. Are we going to ask the government to rescue them all? The other burning question I wonder about, wasn't our country founded on a principle that guarenteed free enterprise? How does that coincide with the current trend of governmental attempts to nationalize businesses? But nobody is asking those questions, so I suppose it doesn't matter. We do hope you enjoy today's issue Cordially Martin aka the postman THE COMICS dogs n cats http://www.thepostm the end justifies http://www.thepostm Lois I want you to know... http://www.thepostm signs you are on a bad date http://www.thepostm a frightening discovery http://www.thepostm right click http://www.thepostm I'm not sure http://www.thepostm little does she know http://www.thepostm at the mall http://www.thepostm  LETS GO TO THE MOVIES break dancing http://www.thepostm a soldier comes home http://www.thepostm kitty and the box http://www.thepostm wheel of fortune http://www.thepostm Obama's radio address http://www.thepostm INTERESTING STUFF Lets say thanks to our troops http://www.thepostm how to toilet train your cat http://www.thepostm Somewhere in time-Hubble telescope http://www.thepostm POWER POINT DISPLAYS a true friend http://www.thepostm Venice in Dubai http://www.thepostm When I look in the mirror http://www.thepostm Once upon a time there lived a king. The king had a beautiful daughter, the princess. But there was a problem. Due to a curse placed on her by an old witch, everything the princess touched would melt. No matter what, metal, wood, plastic; anything she touched would melt! Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her. The king despaired. What could he do to help his daughter? He consulted his wizards and magicians. One wizard told the king, "If your daughter touches one thing that does not melt in her hands, the curse will be broken and she will be cured." The king was overjoyed. The next day, he held a competition. Any man that could bring his daughter an object that would not melt would marry her and inherit the king's wealth. Three young princes took up the challenge. The first prince brought a very hard alloy of titanium. But alas, once the princess touched it, it melted. The prince went away sadly. The second prince brought a huge diamond, the hardest substance in the world. But alas, once the princess touched it, it melted. He too went away disappointed. The third prince approached. He told the princess, "Put your hand in my pocket and feel what is in there." The princess did as she was told. She felt something hard. Though she turned red, she held it in her hand. And it did not melt! The king was overjoyed. Everybody in the kingdom was overjoyed. And the third prince married the princess and they both lived happily ever after. Question: What was the object in the prince's pants? (Scroll down for the answer.) They were M&M's, of course. They melt in your mouth, not in your hand.(And just what did you think it was?) ____________ Two men died and went to heaven. God greeted them, and said "I'm sorry, gentlemen, but your mansions aren't ready yet. Until they are, I can send you back to Earth as whatever you want to be." "Great!" said the first guy, "I want to be an eagle soaring above beautiful scenery!" "No problem," replied God, and POOF! The guy was gone. "And what do you want to be,"God asked the other guy. "I'd like to be one cool stud!" was the reply. "Easy," replied God, and the other guy was gone. After a few months, their mansions were finished, and God sent an angel to fetch them back. "You'll find them easily," he says, "One of them is soaring above the Grand Canyon, and the other one is on a snow tire somewhere in Detroit!" ____________ A lady said to her friend, "My birthday is coming up and when people ask me what I want, I can't think of anything." Her friend told her, "I love giving homemade gifts. Which one of my children would you like?" ____________ A tourist from France goes on his first overseas trip. Upon arriving, he is visibly puzzled filling his visa application. The border official looks over his shoulder, and sees the tourist trying to write, 'Twice a week' into the smallspace labeled, 'SEX'. The official explains, "No, no, no. That is not what we mean by this question. We want to know either 'Male' or 'Female'." "Doesn't matter," the tourist answers. ____________ Three old guys from the twilight home were given, as a treat, a day at the beach. And it turned out to be a nudist beach. They were watching the various young women agog. When the prettiest of them all walked by, one of the men said, "I'd like to give her a hug." "I'd like to give her a kiss," said the second man. And the third old man said, "What was that other thing we used to do?" ____________ Martin has a first date lined up with a woman he had been after for quite a while, and when she finally consented to go out with him, he wanted to plan the most romantic evening he could. He picks her up at her apartment, and then drives out to the beach. Martin has prepared very carefully for this date and brings out a blanket for them to sit upon the sand and a bottle of the finest wine. The moonlight is shining down on them and Martin pours his date some wine. He hands her the glass, looks lovingly in to her eyes and says, "Now this is what I call romantic. The waves crashing on the shore, the moonlight in your eyes, a warm tropical breeze, a bottle of wine.....oh and by the way...do you Spit or Swallow? ____________ Finding A Cure http://www.buffalos ____________ FUN PAGES from Lorraine First Kiss http://tinyurl. Wedding Nightmares http://tinyurl. Amazing Miracle Pictures http://tinyurl. THAT'S ALL FOLKS Have a nice day FROM: Martin aka the postman |
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