THE POSTMAN'S CORNER! Where the world goes for its daily dose of humor!  With the ever increasing prices of gasoline, don't you wish there was some way you could save some money? Here's your chance!! Reduce the price at the pump with a FREE $1,000 Gas Gift Card to your favorite Gas Stations! (Participation required. See below for details.) Get yours now by visiting below! http://www.thepostm  The New GE(R) Tall Tub Built-in Dishwasher features enough room to wash 15 place settings, cookie sheets, extra tall items and even has an extra flip down rack for smaller dishes. It also features the brand new Sani Sensor(TM) technology, which continuously monitors water temperature to ensure proper sanitization! Upgrade your tired old dishwasher today with a brand New GE(R) Tall Tub for FREE! http://www.thepostm  Eliminate Odors in Your Home - For Good! Try FEBREZE AIR REFRESHER & AIR AFFECTS for FREE*! From the bedroom & bathroom to the living room couch & even the kitty litter, add an extra lift to any fabric or space with Linen & Sky scent FEBREZE, yours FREE*. http://www.thepostm  BOUNTY BIG QUILTS - Soft on Skin, Tough on Spills! Get Your FREE* Value Pack of 15 Rolls of BOUNTY Name Brand Paper Towel and watch everyday messes erase like magic! BOUNTY Big Quilts absorb faster than the average paper towel so you can get the job done in one clean sweep. http://www.thepostm You couldn't get a job at McDonalds and become district manager after 143 days of experience. You couldn't become chief of surgery after 143 days of experience of being a surgeon. You couldn't get a job as a teacher and be the superintendent after 143 days of experience. You couldn't join the military and become a colonel after 143 days of experience. You couldn't get a job as a reporter and become the nightly news anchor after 143 days of experience. So what do you do with 143 days of experience? Apparently you run for president because you are not qualified to do anything else. We do hope you enjoy today's issue! Cordially Martin aka the postman  THE COMICS unemployed http://www.thepostm save the whale http://www.thepostm eat healthy http://www.thepostm the testimony http://www.thepostm the blind dog http://www.thepostm easier than arguing http://www.thepostm muscle builder http://www.thepostm a stool pidgeon http://www.thepostm  LETS GO TO THE MOVIES head first http://www.thepostm the motorcycle http://www.thepostm cold and refreshing http://www.thepostm new educational channel-wav file http://www.thepostm leaving tracks http://www.thepostm office stress #3 http://www.thepostm office stress #4 http://www.thepostm the vet who did not vet http://www.thepostm ____________ INTERESTING STUFF Leon's random generators which character am I? http://www.thepostm tongue twisters http://www.thepostm eyewitness to history http://www.thepostm There was a group therapy session with four young Mothers and their small children. 'You all have obsessions,' he observed. To the first mother, Mary, he said, 'You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy.' He turned to the second Mom, Ann: 'Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny.' He turned to the third Mom, Joyce: 'Your obsession is alcohol. This too shows itself in your child's name, Brandy.' At this point, the fourth mother, Kathy, quietly got up, took her little boy By the hand and whispered, 'Come on, Dick, we're leaving. Your brothers Peter and Willy are waiting for us.'' ____________ "Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper." "What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn't go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking fancy meal!" "I know all that." "Then why did you invite a friend for supper?" "Because the poor fool's thinking about getting married." _________ Whenever my aunt went to the doctor, she would complain to me about the long delay she always endured. One day, when my aunt's name was finally called, she was asked to step on the scale. "I need to get your weight today," said the nurse. Without a moment's hesitation, my aunt replied, "One hour and 45 minutes!" ____________ My mom has a lead foot, so I was not surprised when a stateTrooper pulled us over as we were driving through Georgia.Hoping to get off with a warning, Mom tried to appear shockedWhen he walked up to the car. "I have never been stopped like this before," she said to theOfficer. "What do they usually do, ma'am," he asked, "shoot the tiresOut?" ____________ A woman friend of ours was in the habit of having long telephone conversations that sometimes lasted over an hour. One day she hung up after 25 minutes."What is the matter?" asked her husband. "You were on the phone talking for less than half an hour." "I got a wrong number," the woman replied. ____________ A Polar bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'll have a gin......... The bartender asks, "What's with the big pause?" The bear says, "I dunno, I've always had them." ____________ There once was an Indian who had only one testicle and whose given name was 'Onestone'. He hated that name and asked everyone not to call him Onestone. After years and years of torment, Onestone finally cracked and said, 'If anyone calls me Onestone again, I will kill them!' The word got around and nobody called him that any more. Then one day a young woman named Blue Bird forgot and said, 'Good morning, Onestone.' He jumped up, grabbed her and took her deep into the forest where he made love to her all day and all night. He made love to her all the next day, until Blue Bird died from exhaustion. The word got around that Onestone meant what he promised he would do. Years went by and no one dared call him by his given name until a woman named Yellow Bird returned to the village after being away. Yellow Bird, who was Blue Bird's cousin, was overjoyed when she saw Onestone. She hugged him and said, 'Good to see you, Onestone' Onestone grabbed her, took her deep into the forest, then he made love to her all day, made love to her all night, made love to her all the next day, made love to her all the next night, but Yellow Bird wouldn't die! Why ??? OH, come on ... take a guess !!! Think about it !!! You're going to love this !!! Everyone knows... You can't kill Two Birds with OneStone !!! ____________ Menu http://buffalosjoke Messed Up http://buffalosjoke Embarassing http://buffalosjoke New Terrorist Weapon Strategy http://tinyurl. Nail Gun http://tinyurl. PAPA Thorn Saucy Mona...wait for it... http://able2laugh. THAT'S ALL FOLKS Have a nice day FROM: Martin aka the postman |
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