THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself
into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket
and trying to lift himself up by the handle.
-- Winston Churchill
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THE COMICS
class
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the tsa
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platonic
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sniff sniff
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Mable needs mouthwash
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LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Rodney Carrington - Chicken Song
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Tail Fins and Chrome features: Cars of Dreams
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JAPANESE MAKE FUN OF U S TSA SCREENING……
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A Duke was hunting in the forest with his men-at-arms
and servants when he came across a tree. Upon it,
archery targets were painted and smack in the
middle of each was an arrow."Who is this incredibly
fine archer?" cried the duke. "I must find him!"
After continuing through the forest for a few
miles he came across a small boy carrying a bow and
arrow. Eventually the boy admitted that it was he who
shot the arrows plumb in the center of all the targets.
"You didn't just walk up to the targets and hammer
the arrows into the middle, did you?" asked the duke
worriedly."No my lord. I shot them from a hundred paces.
I swear it by all that I hold holy.""That is truly
astonishing," said the duke. "I hereby admit you into
my service." The boy thanked him profusely.
"But I must ask one favor in return," the duke continued.
"You must tell me how you came to be such an outstanding
shot.""Well," said the boy, "first I fire the arrow at
the tree......and then I paint the target around it."
___________________
A secretary for a foreign embassy was entertaining a
wealthy foreign ambassador during lunch at a very expensive
restaurant in New York . The ambassador was so enthralled
by the beauty and presence of this secretary that he asked
her to marry him. The secretary was startled, but remembered
that her boss told her never to insult foreign dignitaries,
so she decided to let him down easy.
"I'll only marry you under three conditions."
"Anything, anything," said the ambassador.
"First, you must buy me a 14-karat gold wedding band with a
72 carat diamond, along with a 28-inch studded matching
necklace for our engagement." Without hesitation, the ambassador
picked up his cellular phone, called his personal accountant,
told him the instructions, and said, "Yes, yes, I buy, I buy!"
The secretary thought that her first request was too easy,
so she thought of a more difficult situation.
"Second, I want you to build me a 58-acre mansion in the richest
part of the Hamptons along with a 40-acre summer home in the
sweetest vineyards of France ." The ambassador picked up his
phone, called his personal broker in New York , then called another
broker in France , and after his quick conversation, he said,
"Yes, yes, I build, I build!" The secretary was very startled,
and knew she must think of a final request that would be
impossible to live up to. "Finally," she said. "I'll only marry
you if you have a 10-inch penis." A sad face befell the ambassador,
and he cupped his face in his hands. After weeping in his native
language for a few minutes, the ambassador slowly lifted his head
and said, "Ok, ok, I cut, I cut!"
_________________
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint
Peter at the pearly gates.
'In honor of this holy season' Saint Peter said,
'You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas
to get into heaven.'
The man from Nova Scotia fumbled through his pockets and
pulled out a lighter.
He flicked it on. 'It represents a candle', he said.
'You may pass through the pearly gates' Saint Peter said.
The man from Saskatchewan reached into his pocket and
pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said,
'They're bells. 'Saint Peter said 'You may pass through
the pearly gates'.The Newfoundlander started searching
desperately through his pockets and finally
pulled out a pair of women's panties.St. Peter looked at the
man with a raised eyebrow and asked, 'And just what do
those symbolize?'The Newfie replied, 'These are Carols.'
And So The Christmas Season Begins......
BUFFALO BILL
Only Want Sex
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Pool
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Sensitivity Training
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THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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