THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
Good morning postman fans!
So. I hope you all had a great Xmas!
Sorry this is a little short. I had
a bit too many xmas cookies an d candy
for the holidays. its not so good for a
diabetic:)
We do hope you enjoy today's issue
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
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THE COMICS
cat carrier
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y036.html
I hope you remember
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y037.html
anniversary present
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y038.html
thats it
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y039.html
gifts
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y040.html
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movies
amazing grace
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/559.html
the hamster
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/558.html
This man walks in to a psychiatrist's office
and lies down on the couch. The shrink says,
"What makes you think you need the services
of a psychiatrist?"The man replies that he wakes
up every night in the kitchen after some pretty
crazy sleepwalking. The shrink says, "So,
would you like me to try to cure you of
sleepwalking?"The man explains that the
sleepwalking isn't really the problem.
Every time he wakes up he is in the same
place, doing the samething - he has his pajamas
around his ankles and his dick in a
jar of peanuts.The psychiatrist says,
"I think I know what your problem is.
You're fucking nuts."
______________
A husband and wife go visit a marriage counselor.
First, the wife speaks to the counselor alone.
The counselor asks, "You say you've been married
20 years, so what seems to be the problem?"
The wife replies, "It's my husband, he's driving
me crazy! I'm going to leave him if he continues!"
"How does he drive you crazy?"
"For 20 years," she says, "he's been doing these stupid things.
First, whenever we go out, he's always looking at the floor and
refuses to go near anyone. It's very embarrassing."
The marriage counselor is amused, "Anything else?"
"He keeps picking his nose all the time! Even in public!"
"Hmm, anything else?"
The wife hesitates, "whenever we're making love, he NEVER lets me
be on top! Once in a while, I'd like to be in control!"
"Ah," says the counselor, "I think I'll talk to your husband
now." So the wife goes out of the room and the husband enters.
The counselor tells him, "Your wife says that you've been driving
her crazy. She might even leave you."
The husband looks shocked, "WHAT? For 20 years I've been loving
and considerate and I've always given her what she wants! What
could be the problem?"
The counselor explains, "She says that you've got these habits
that are driving her crazy. First, you're always acting strange
in public; looking at the floor and never going near anyone
else."The husband looks concerned, "Oh, you don't understand! It's one
of the few things my father told me to do on his death bed and I
swore I'd obey everything he said."
"What did he say?"
"He said that I should never step on anyone's toes!"
The counselor looks amused, "Actually, that means that you should
not do anything that would cause anyone else to get angry."
The husband looks sheepish, "Oh. Okay."
The counselor continues, "And you keep picking your nose in
public."
"Well, its another thing my father specifically commanded me to
do! He told me to always keep my nose clean."
The counselor looks faint, "That means that you should not
indulge in any criminal activity."
"Oh," says the husband feeling very stupid.
"And finally, she says that you never allow her to be on top
during your lovemaking."
"This," says the husband seriously, "is the last thing my father
commanded me to do on his deathbed and it's the most important
thing.""What did he say?" asks the counselor
"With his dying breath, he said, 'Don't screw up.'"
________________
It was a romantic full moon when Pedro said, "Hey, mamacita,
let's do Weeweechu." "Oh no, not now, let's look at the moon!"
said Rosita. "Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and I do Weeweechu.
I love you and it's the perfect time," Pedro begged. "But
I wanna just hold your hand and watch the moon.", replied Rosita.
"Please, corazoncito, just once, do Weeweechu with me."
Rosita looked at Pedro and said, "OK, one time, we'll do Weeweechu."
Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang... "Weeweechu a Merry
Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas,
and a Happy New Year
___________________
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