THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is
so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
___________
Shop at your favorite stores and supermarkets.
Get a $250 grocery gift card, FREE
http://www.tinyurl.com/yzxv7az
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
America's Worst French Fries
In spite of the name, French
fries are practically an American birthright.
They're offered as the first choice side dish
with nearly every fast-food and sit-down chain
meal available. But here's the catch: In a
recent study of 7,318 New York City patrons
leaving fast food chains during the lunch
hour, researchers learned that combo meals—
meaning meals with sides—averaged 1,100 calories
each, which is over half a day's allotment.
It goes to show: When your regular meals at
these restaurants are already pushing the
nutritional envelope, adding an extra
300 (or more!) empty calories can make for a
dietary disaster.
I was kindof interested in this article.
I eat out during the day quite a bit actually.
Usually there is not a lot to eat around
here while the war department is at work,
I'm too lazy to cook. And it gives me something
to do. Well, ok, I could ramble on with
excuses. You probably make them yourself.
The article went on to mention the 3 worst
fries in America:
1. Arby's curly fries
2. Jack in the box bacon cheddar
and last but not least...
3. Dairy Queen Chili Cheese Fries
(based on calories and grams of fat.)
But you will never guess, know what the BEST fries in
America were? Well, based on calories and grams of fat?
Believe it or not, it was the McDonald's small fries.
So, America, go and pig out at the Golden Arches.
Martin aka the postman has the evidence that says its ok:)
http://www.tinyurl.com/yzobsnc
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
______________
THE COMICS
excuse me doctor
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/o020.html
tape
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/o021.html
the library
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/o022.html
can't read french
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/o023.html
sometimes
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/o024.html
a hybrid
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/o025.html
tech support
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/o026.html
some day, Jimmy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/o027.html
1 year anniversary
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/o028.html
should've known
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/o029.html
______________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
automated phone sex
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9159.html
Japanese high wire
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9160.html
good chili
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9161.html
late nigt catechism
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9162.html
I am a Canadian
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9163.html
Michael Jackson medley
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9164.html
wedding photos
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies9165.html
A grandmother was pushing her grandchild around WalMart
in a buggy. Each time she put something in the basket,
she would say, "And here's something for you, Diploma,"
or "This will make a cute little outfit for you,
Diploma," and so on.
Eventually a bewildered shopper who'd heard all this
finally asked, "Why do you keep calling your grandchild
Diploma?"
The grandmother replied, "I sent my daughter to college
and this is what she came home with!"
____________
The first Jewish woman President is elected.
She calls her Mother: "Mama, I've won the elections,
you've got to come to the swearing-in ceremony."
"I don't know, what would I wear?"
"Don't worry, I'll send you a dressmaker"
"But I only eat kosher food"
"Mama, I am going to be the president, I can get you
kosher food""But how will I get there?"
"I'll send a limo, just come mama"
"Ok, Ok, if it makes you happy.
The great day comes and Mama is seated between the
Supreme Court Justices and the Future Cabinet members,
she nudges the gentleman on her right. "You see that girl,
the one with her hand on the Bible?"
..."Her brother's a doctor!"
______________
An old geezer in an old people's home takes a fancy
to a woman who is also staying there. One day he
plucks up the courage to go and talk to her and
after a while he says he would like to make love to
her. She agrees that when everybody else goes on a
day trip they both stay behind at the home and get
down to it. The old man goes to the woman's room and
asks her how she likes to be made love to. She tells
him that she loves a man to go down on her and asks
him if he would mind. He says he would love to do
that for her and goes for it. After about 30 seconds
he comes back up and says that he is sorry but it just
smells too bad down there. She thinks for a minute and
tells him that it must be the arthritis. He looks and
her confused and states that surely you can't get
arthritis down there and even if you could it wouldn't
cause that smell. She says "No it's the arthritis in my
shoulder; I can't wipe my ass properly!"
_______________
There was an old Native American who wanted a loan for
$500.The banker pulled out the loan application,
"What are you going to do with the money?"
"Take jewelry to city and sell it," was the response.
"What have you got for collateral?"
"Don't know collateral."
"Well that's something of value that would cover the c
ost of the loan. Have you got any vehicles?"
"Yes, 1949 Chevy pickup."
The banker shook his head, "How about livestock?"
"Yes, I have a horse."
"How old is it?"
"Don't know, has no teeth."
Finally the banker decided to make the $500 loan.
Several weeks later the old man was back in the bank.
He pulled out a roll of bills, "Here to pay." he said..
He then handed the banker the money to pay his loan off.
"What are you going to do with the rest of that money?"
"Put in tepee."
"Why don't you deposit it in my bank," he asked.
"Don't know deposit."
"You put the money in our bank and we take care of it
for you. When you want to use it you can withdraw it."
The old Indian leaned across the desk,
"What you got for collateral?"
_____________
A wife went to the police station with her next-door
neighbor to report that her husband was missing. The
policeman asked for a description. She said, "He's 35
years old, 6 foot 4, has dark eyes, dark wavy hair, an
athletic build, weighs 185 pounds, is soft-spoken, and
and his dick is nine inches long."
The next-door neighbor protested, "Your husband is 5
foot 4, chubby, bald, has a big mouth, and his dick is
four inches long," The wife replied, "Well, I don't want
THAT one back and by the way how do you know about his dick
____________
Mary: Did you hear that Linda got a great new job?
Jill: Really? I wish I could do that. I'd like a change
for the better.
Mary Well, you can always do what she did.
Jill: What's that?
Mary: Don't wear panties to the interview.
______________
In the days of the Depression, a family had trapped a
few ducks. As they needed some things only money could
buy, the father requested his three sons take a duck
each and travel off trying to sell them. They agreed
and headed off on seperate ways.
The youngest of them knocked on the door of a nearby
farm house and a shapely young blonde farm girl answered
the door. "S'cuse me ma'am" said the guy. "I'm wunderin'
if y'd be intrested in buyin this here duck frum me".
The women replied "I'd sure like me that plump duck to
cook fur our supper, but I aint got no money to spare".
"How about a fuck for it?" she asked. The man didn't
hesitate and replied "Sure!".After they'd done the deal,
the lonely farm girl said "If'n yer fuck me again - ya can
have the duck back".So he did, and afterwards headed off
along the road with the duck still under his arm. Soon a
large truck roared past the man which frightened the duck
so much that it jumped out of his arms and right under
the wheels where it was squashed.The truck driver stopped
and got out to speak with the man who explained that he was
out trying to get money for his family by selling the duck.
The truck driver felt remorse and offered the guy a dollar
for his trouble. The man agreed and headed for home with
the money in his pocket.That evening as they all gathered
around the table, the father asked them how they did.
The first son replied "I done good pa, I got me three
dollars fur my duck".The second son replied "I done better
'n him pa, I got five dollars".Then the third son leaned
back in his chair showing a cheeky grin and said "I done
better 'n all uf yers, I got a fuck for a duck, a duck
for a fuck and a buck for a fucked up duck!".
__________
FUN PAGES
Donkey Kong Game
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41525&s=n
Beans in Space
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=39813&s=n
Halle Berry Halle's Berries
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=40810&s=n
___________
BUFFALO BILL
Cats In Heat
http://www.buffaloschips.com/32808.htm
What Happened
http://www.buffaloschips.com/32809.htm
Have Some!
http://www.buffaloschips.com/32810.htm
_______________
SYDESJOKES LIST
Home Made Olympics
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000729.html
Home Made Tank
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000730.html
Home Plumber
http://sydesjokes.com/lnk/vid1/000731.html
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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