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THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
where the world goes for its daily dose of humor!
(made in the USA)
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adult humor. wanna subscribe? send a blank email to:
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I don't give a rip:)
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just hit reply to this email and...cya!!!!!!!
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
What's better than Papa John's pizza? FREE PAPA John's pizza
Did you know that you can get FREE PAPA'S JOHN'S PIZZA?
When you’re craving an Italian feast, there's no better place than PAPA JOHN’S.
And now you can enjoy it with friends & family for FREE*!
and get a wide selection of tasty pizza toppings plus hands-down favorites like mouthwatering
Garlic Parmesan Breadsticks, Spicy Buffalo Wings, Chicken Strips & more.
PAPA JOHN'S - It's the Big Papa of all pizza joints!
Click here for FREE PIZZA
http://www.tinyurl.com/yr8lzr
How about some FREE Musketeers candy to go with your Free pizza?
NEW! 3 MUSKETEERS Mint with Dark Chocolate
Get a 24-Pack of NEW 3 MUSKETEERS Mint with Dark Chocolate Bars, FREE*!
http://www.tinyurl.com/34okcr
The war department reminded me that its not our 30th anniversary. She politely corrected me in an email yesterday
that it is actually our 28th anniversary, instead. (Hey, ya gotta give me credit, at least I remembered the date
even if I had the number of years wrong.) Anyways, on our wedding night so many years ago, we went to
a very nice restaurant. We were as poor as dirt then.
We ordered one prime rib petite cut, just one dinner, and then split it. So, to keep with tradition, we went out last
night for supper at Logan's Roadhouse, but we each ordered our own prime rib dinner. In fact, I got the big one,
therefore allowing for left overs for lunch today. We did skip the traditional bottle of wine, though.
Neither of us are really drinkers, however we have been known to celebrate the rare special occasion with
a bottle of expensive wine. But we skipped the wine last night since we both have medical issues these days
which don't mix well with alcohol. Just as well, I can live without it.
The cute little blonde waitress asked us how many years and
I promptly replied, "About a 100." prompting those infamous "rolling eyeballs" from the war department.
We're still poor as dirt today as we were 28 years ago, only difference is that
today, we have plastic. lol. It has been a great 28 years whether I eat prime rib for supper, or watery soup.
Fact is, the watery soup seems to happen more often than the prime rib. But that really doesn't matter.
After all, she says I'm happy, so I must be:)
I dread success. To have succeeded is to have finished one's business on earth, like the male spider,
who is killed by the female the moment he has succeeded in his courtship.
I like a state of continual becoming, with a goal in front and not behind.
If you have an apple and I have an apple and we exchange these apples then you
and I will still each have one apple. But if you have an idea and I have an idea
and we exchange these ideas, then each of us will have two ideas.
Imagination is the beginning of creation. You imagine what you desire,
you will what you imagine, and at last you create what you will.
Man can climb to the highest summits, but he cannot dwell there long.
The only way to avoid being miserable is not to have enough leisure to wonder whether you are happy or not.
- All from George Bernard Shaw 1856-1920
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
LET'S GO TO THE MOVIES!
beer commercial #1
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/movies167.html
beer commercial #2
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/movies168.html
beer commercial #3
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/movies169.html
shopping
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/movies170.html
dang ole innernet
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/movies171.html
THE COMICS
the proctologist
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w070.html
a guy and a girl
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w071.html
the sex urge
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w072.html
talk about embarrasing
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w073.html
solving problems
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w074.html
diets work!!!
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w075.html
my favorite
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w076.html
the truth about the internet
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w077.html
sometimes diets are lousy
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w078.html
alzheimers clinic
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w079.html
too expensive
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w080.html
THE JOKES
How Golf is like Urinating in a Public Restroom
10. Keep your back straight, knees bent, feet shoulder width apart.
9. Form a loose grip.
8. Keep your head down.
7. Avoid a quick backswing.
6. Stay out of the water.
5. Try not to hit anybody.
4. If you are taking too long, you should let others go ahead of you.
3. You shouldn't stand directly in front of others.
2. Be quiet while others are about to go.
1. Keep strokes to a minimum.
___________________
Hillary Clinton and her driver were cruising along a country road one evening when an
ancient cow loomed in front of the car, the driver tried to avoid it but couldn't -
the aged bovine was struck and killed. Hillary told her driver to go up to the farmhouse and
explain to the owners what had happened. She stayed in the car making phone calls to lobbyists.
About an hour later the driver staggered back to the car with his clothes in disarray.
He was holding a half-empty bottle of expensive wine in one hand, a rare
Cuban cigar in the other, and was smiling happily, smeared with lipstick.
"What happened to you," asked Hillary?
"Well," the driver replied, "the farmer gave me the cigar, his wife gave me the wine,
and their beautiful twin daughters made passionate love to me"!
" My God, what did you tell them?" asked Hillary.
The driver replied, "I just stepped inside the door and said,
I'm Hillar y Clinton's driver and I've just killed the old cow.
_____________________
Mildred, 93, was despondent over the recent death of her husband Earl,
so she decided to just kill herself and join him in death.
Thinking it would be best to get it over with quickly, she took out Earl's old Army pistol and
made the decision to shoot herself in the heart since it was so badly broken in the first place.
Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become a vegetable and
a burden to someone, she called her doctor's office to learn her heart's exact location.
"Since you're a woman," the doctor said,
"your heart is just below your left breast. Why do you ask?"
She hung up without answering. Later that night,
Mildred was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound to her knee.
_________________
A realtor in her forties went to a plastic surgeon for a face-lift.
The surgeon told her about a new procedure called "The Knob",
Where a small knob is placed on the top of a woman's head and can be turned to
Tighten up her skin to produce the effect of a brand new face lift.
Of course, the woman wanted "The Knob."
Over the course of the years, the woman tightened the knob, and the
Effects were wonderful, the woman remained young looking and vibrant.
After fifteen years, the woman returned to the surgeon with two problems:
"All these years, everything has been working just fine. I've had to turn
The knob many times and I've always loved the results. But now
I've developed two annoying problems: First, I have these terrible bags
Under my eyes and the knob won't get rid of them."
The doctor looked at her closely and said, "Those aren't bags, those are Your breasts."
She said, "Well, I guess there's no point in asking about the goatee....."
________________
Son: "Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady."
Mom: "Well, you have done the right thing."
Son: "But mom, I was sitting on daddy's lap
______________
A little boy asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom.She Said yes.
When he went to wipe his fanny there was no toilet paper so,he used his hand.
When he got back to class,his teacher asked, "What do you have in your hand?"The boy said,
"A little leprechaun and if I open my hand he'll get scared away.
"He was then sent to the principal's office and the principal asked him,
"What do you have in your hand?"The little boy said, "A little leprechaun and if I open my hands
he'll get scared away."The principal got mad and yelled, "Open your hands NOW!'
He did and the little boy said,'Oh great,now look what you did,you scared the **** out of him!"
________________
BUFFALO'S
Movies
plunge off the new river bridge
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/3254.htm
A Reporter Can Watch
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/3255.htm
Pool
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/3256.htm
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
where the world goes for its daily dose of humor!
(made in the USA)
THIS EZINE IS FREE TO ALL WHO ASK FOR IT
adult humor. wanna subscribe? send a blank email to:
PostmansCorner-
Disclaimer.:
Don't like what you read?
keep yer comments to yerself,
I don't give a rip:)
wanna unsubscribe? don't bug the list owner, he'll just send you a nasty email.
just hit reply to this email and...cya!!!
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
What's better than Papa John's pizza? FREE PAPA John's pizza
Did you know that you can get FREE PAPA'S JOHN'S PIZZA?
When you’re craving an Italian feast, there's no better place than PAPA JOHN’S.
And now you can enjoy it with friends & family for FREE*!
and get a wide selection of tasty pizza toppings plus hands-down favorites like mouthwatering
Garlic Parmesan Breadsticks, Spicy Buffalo Wings, Chicken Strips & more.
PAPA JOHN'S - It's the Big Papa of all pizza joints!
Click here for FREE PIZZA
http://www.tinyurl.
How about some FREE Musketeers candy to go with your Free pizza?
NEW! 3 MUSKETEERS Mint with Dark Chocolate
Get a 24-Pack of NEW 3 MUSKETEERS Mint with Dark Chocolate Bars, FREE*!
http://www.tinyurl.
The war department reminded me that its not our 30th anniversary. She politely corrected me in an email yesterday
that it is actually our 28th anniversary, instead. (Hey, ya gotta give me credit, at least I remembered the date
even if I had the number of years wrong.) Anyways, on our wedding night so many years ago, we went to
a very nice restaurant. We were as poor as dirt then.
We ordered one prime rib petite cut, just one dinner, and then split it. So, to keep with tradition, we went out last
night for supper at Logan's Roadhouse, but we each ordered our own prime rib dinner. In fact, I got the big one,
therefore allowing for left overs for lunch today. We did skip the traditional bottle of wine, though.
Neither of us are really drinkers, however we have been known to celebrate the rare special occasion with
a bottle of expensive wine. But we skipped the wine last night since we both have medical issues these days
which don't mix well with alcohol. Just as well, I can live without it.
The cute little blonde waitress asked us how many years and
I promptly replied, "About a 100." prompting those infamous "rolling eyeballs" from the war department.
We're still poor as dirt today as we were 28 years ago, only difference is that
today, we have plastic. lol. It has been a great 28 years whether I eat prime rib for supper, or watery soup.
Fact is, the watery soup seems to happen more often than the prime rib. But that really doesn't matter.
After all, she says I'm happy, so I must be:)
I dread success. To have succeeded is to have finished one's business on earth, like the male spider,
who is killed by the female the moment he has succeeded in his courtship.
I like a state of continual becoming, with a goal in front and not behind.
If you have an apple and I have an apple and we exchange these apples then you
and I will still each have one apple. But if you have an idea and I have an idea
and we exchange these ideas, then each of us will have two ideas.
Imagination is the beginning of creation. You imagine what you desire,
you will what you imagine, and at last you create what you will.
Man can climb to the highest summits, but he cannot dwell there long.
The only way to avoid being miserable is not to have enough leisure to wonder whether you are happy or not.
- All from George Bernard Shaw 1856-1920
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
LET'S GO TO THE MOVIES!
beer commercial #1
http://www.thepostm
beer commercial #2
http://www.thepostm
beer commercial #3
http://www.thepostm
shopping
http://www.thepostm
dang ole innernet
http://www.thepostm
THE COMICS
the proctologist
http://www.thepostm
a guy and a girl
http://www.thepostm
the sex urge
http://www.thepostm
talk about embarrasing
http://www.thepostm
solving problems
http://www.thepostm
diets work!!!
http://www.thepostm
my favorite
http://www.thepostm
the truth about the internet
http://www.thepostm
sometimes diets are lousy
http://www.thepostm
alzheimers clinic
http://www.thepostm
too expensive
http://www.thepostm
THE JOKES
How Golf is like Urinating in a Public Restroom
10. Keep your back straight, knees bent, feet shoulder width apart.
9. Form a loose grip.
8. Keep your head down.
7. Avoid a quick backswing.
6. Stay out of the water.
5. Try not to hit anybody.
4. If you are taking too long, you should let others go ahead of you.
3. You shouldn't stand directly in front of others.
2. Be quiet while others are about to go.
1. Keep strokes to a minimum.
____________
Hillary Clinton and her driver were cruising along a country road one evening when an
ancient cow loomed in front of the car, the driver tried to avoid it but couldn't -
the aged bovine was struck and killed. Hillary told her driver to go up to the farmhouse and
explain to the owners what had happened. She stayed in the car making phone calls to lobbyists.
About an hour later the driver staggered back to the car with his clothes in disarray.
He was holding a half-empty bottle of expensive wine in one hand, a rare
Cuban cigar in the other, and was smiling happily, smeared with lipstick.
"What happened to you," asked Hillary?
"Well," the driver replied, "the farmer gave me the cigar, his wife gave me the wine,
and their beautiful twin daughters made passionate love to me"!
" My God, what did you tell them?" asked Hillary.
The driver replied, "I just stepped inside the door and said,
I'm Hillar y Clinton's driver and I've just killed the old cow.
____________
Mildred, 93, was despondent over the recent death of her husband Earl,
so she decided to just kill herself and join him in death.
Thinking it would be best to get it over with quickly, she took out Earl's old Army pistol and
made the decision to shoot herself in the heart since it was so badly broken in the first place.
Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become a vegetable and
a burden to someone, she called her doctor's office to learn her heart's exact location.
"Since you're a woman," the doctor said,
"your heart is just below your left breast. Why do you ask?"
She hung up without answering. Later that night,
Mildred was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound to her knee.
____________
A realtor in her forties went to a plastic surgeon for a face-lift.
The surgeon told her about a new procedure called "The Knob",
Where a small knob is placed on the top of a woman's head and can be turned to
Tighten up her skin to produce the effect of a brand new face lift.
Of course, the woman wanted "The Knob."
Over the course of the years, the woman tightened the knob, and the
Effects were wonderful, the woman remained young looking and vibrant.
After fifteen years, the woman returned to the surgeon with two problems:
"All these years, everything has been working just fine. I've had to turn
The knob many times and I've always loved the results. But now
I've developed two annoying problems: First, I have these terrible bags
Under my eyes and the knob won't get rid of them."
The doctor looked at her closely and said, "Those aren't bags, those are Your breasts."
She said, "Well, I guess there's no point in asking about the goatee....."
____________
Son: "Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady."
Mom: "Well, you have done the right thing."
Son: "But mom, I was sitting on daddy's lap
____________
A little boy asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom.She Said yes.
When he went to wipe his fanny there was no toilet paper so,he used his hand.
When he got back to class,his teacher asked, "What do you have in your hand?"The boy said,
"A little leprechaun and if I open my hand he'll get scared away.
"He was then sent to the principal's office and the principal asked him,
"What do you have in your hand?"The little boy said, "A little leprechaun and if I open my hands
he'll get scared away."The principal got mad and yelled, "Open your hands NOW!'
He did and the little boy said,'Oh great,now look what you did,you scared the **** out of him!"
____________
BUFFALO'S
Movies
plunge off the new river bridge
http://www.buffalos
A Reporter Can Watch
http://www.buffalos
Pool
http://www.buffalos
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
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