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Mad Man Jokes
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Easy, efective tips for Keeping Your Kids Safer today!
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Tested 'n' Proven Internet Marketing Tips
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you'll receive a free report
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Magical Almanac MAGICAL ALMANAC
is for thoughtful, intelligent people who are seeking something deeper than the
usual New Age – astrological fare.
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Model Magnet
for Men Advanced dating advice for men who want to succeed with women
http://www.thepostm
Deals_news
Deals and news from major retailers
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Did you hear that Eureka vacuum cleaners is branching out?
They are now offering budget breast enlargement programs
available and designed for low income women who can't afford boob
implants.
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FROM: THE INVESTIGATIVE REPORTS BUREAU OF
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
BREAKING NEWS
Apple Computer announced today that it has developed a computer chip thatcan
store and play music in women's breast implants. The iTit will cost $499 or
$599 depending on size. This is considered to be a major break through because
women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not
listening to them.
Today I have included something a little special in the movies section.
We quite often forget that the footage we see on tv regarding Iraq is a sanitized
scripted version of the war that CNN wants us to see. Today, I've included videos
made by the ones who are there, our soldiers. Be sure to take a look at them!
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman!
____________
THE WAR
please note: this ain't a statement about bein for or agin
the war, its just a look at it the way the soldiers see it
convoy under fire
http://www.thepostm
snipers attack marines
http://www.thepostm
Firefight in Fallujah
http://www.thepostm
marines and children
http://www.thepostm
a human side of war
http://www.thepostm
what's really happening in Iraq
http://www.thepostm
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES!
the brownie
http://www.thepostm
the corvette
http://www.thepostm
baby watch tv
http://www.thepostm
women drivers
http://www.thepostm
preggers
http://www.thepostm
The comics
cyber sex
http://www.thepostm
texas hold em...a better game to play
http://www.thepostm
two is good
http://www.thepostm
the eentsy weentsy spider
http://www.thepostm
the support group
http://www.thepostm
when things get scary in prison
http://www.thepostm
family circus
http://www.thepostm
THE JOKES!
Two hunters, Paul and Kurt, were in a lodge, making small talk.
Paul asked Kurt, "So, what do you hunt?"
Kurt answered "I hunt unicorns."
Paul was startled, but said "Really? How do you do that?"
Kurt replied, "I find a virgin and hire her to help me. The virgin sits
around in the woods until a unicorn comes to her. When it does, it sets off a snare."
Paul said, "Boy, they must be hard to find. I've heard of them, but
I've never seen one."
Kurt said, "Yeah, and there aren't many unicorns around, either!"
____________
This guy goes out with his buddies for a night on the town and they cap
off the festivities by going to a house of ill repute. A week later, the
guy visits his doctor, complaining of a large green lump on the end of his penis.
The doctor does a thorough exam, then pulls down a weighty medical book
and flicks through it till he finds what he's looking for. He looks up
and says, "I'm afraid this is serious. We'll have to operate!"
"Operate?" exclaims the fellow, "Why, Doc? What's the problem?"
"Well, you know how boxers can get a cauliflower ear? You've developed
the same sort of thing. You've got a brothel sprout."
____________
A man is sitting on his front stoop staring morosely
at the ground when his neighbor strolls over. The
neighbor tries to start a conversation several times,
but the older man barely responds. Finally, the
neighbor asks what the problem is.
"Well," the man says, "I ran afoul of one of those
questions women ask. Now I'm in the doghouse."
"What kind of question?" the neighbor asks.
"My wife asked me if I would still love her when she
was old, fat and ugly."
"That's easy," says the neighbor. "You just say, 'Of course I will.'"
"Yeah," says the other man, "that's what I meant to
say. But what came out was, 'Of course I do.'"
____________
A Texan arrives at a New York Hotel, checks in and tells the desk clerk
to send up a bottle of good whiskey and a woman to his room.
In a short while, someone knocks on his door. When he opens it, there
stands an attractive lady in a Salvation Army uniform. He looks
surprised but invites her in.
She says, "You asked for a lady, didn't you?"
He says, "Well, Yes," so she begins to disrobe. When she is almost
undressed, she stops suddenly and says, "By the way, are you married or single?"
He says, "I'm married."
So she starts to put all her clothes back on.
"What the Hell?" the Texan asks.
She replied, "We're strictly for the needy, not the greedy."
____________
One Sunday morning, a young woman, who needed forgiveness for her sins,
came to a Baptist church. She got up in front of the congregation and
stated, "Last week, I slept with a young soldier who picked me up at a
bar and now I ask the Lord's forgiveness.
She continued, "Two days ago, I slept with a young sailor, but now I ask the Lord's forgiveness.
"Hallelujah!
"But tonight, because I have come here and done my penance, I will
sleep with the Lord," she finished. But before the congregation could
respond, an old drunk in the back yelled out in a clear voice, "That's
right momma, fuck 'em all."
____________
BUFFALO'S
Movies
Men
http://www.buffalos
Mentos &Coke
http://www.buffalos
Mixing People
http://www.buffalos
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman!
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