THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
Cherish your vision and your dreams as they are the children of your soul;
the blueprints of your ultimate achievements.
--Napoleon Hill
___________
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
The war department has the day off today. She has declared that
we have about a bajillion things we gotta do. Usually that means
trotting around to various different stores to pick up a bunch of
stuff for which I have no interest. One item happens to be lampshades
for the living room. We tossed all of the old ones during the skunk
episode as there seemed to be no way of getting them clean again.
There is one item that is of interest to me. I am told that I
need to purchase a new area rug for my den. A couple years back,
I spent a lot of money putting a new laminated floor in here. Then
realized after I'd done it that my office chair was going to trash
the thing in short order. So I had picked up an area rug to protect it.
Dumb. Spend all that money puttin in a beautiful floor, and then I
put in a cheap area rug over the top of it. Go figger.
Problem is, you got no way to clean the area rug as it sits on a
laminated floor. And since you can't get a laminated floor wet,
my option is simply to throw away the dirty area rug and get a new one.
Oh well, live and learn.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
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_________________
THE COMICS
inferiority complex
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y030.html
Breasts
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y029.html
Charles has a problem
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y028.html
a wonderful date
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y027.html
fishing
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y026.html
greenhouse emissions
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y025.html
they want you to ...
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y024.html
I thought you would like to know
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y023.html
Of course I love you!
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y022.html
I'm cutting down
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/y021.html
___________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
lending a helping trunk
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5328.html
internet cybering
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5329.html
he won the point
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5330.html
puppet show
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5331.html
dedicated to rednecks
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5332.html
m and ms
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5333.html
skinny dippin
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5334.html
the last bud light
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/movies5335.html
__________
A woman was on the witness stand, accused
of poisoning her husband.
"After you put poison
in the coffee, you sat at the breakfast table
and watched your husband drink it .
Tell me, didn't you feel the slightest bit
of pity for him?" the defense attorney prompted.
"Yes," she replied, "I think there was one
moment when I felt sorry for him."
"And when was that?"
"When he asked for his second cup."
_________________
The nurse was walking down the hospital corridor when her
supervisor spotted her. The supervisor couldn't believe it:
The nurse's hair was unkempt, her dress wrinkled, and to top off
her overall dishevelment, one of her breasts was hanging out of
the open front of her uniform!
"MISS JENNINGS! How can you account for parading around the
hospital not only looking like a derelict, but with your breast exposed!"
"Oh," said the nurse, as she stuffed her breast into her uniform,
"It's those darn interns! They NEVER put anything back when
they're through using it!"
_______________
Ok, it isn't chat. But it isn't news either. Do we have a category for
double edged truth?
A bear, a lion and a chicken are talking.
"When I roar" said the bear, "the forest rumbles."
The lion sniffed.
"When *I* roar, the jungle trembles", he said.
"Oh." Said the chicken.
The lion and bear looked at her, thinking about dinner.
The chicken smiled a small, knowing smile, and said
"When I cough, the whole world shits itself."
_________________
Jacob, age 85 and Rebecca, age 79 are all excited about their
decision to get married. They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding
and on the way home they pass a drugstore. Jacob suggests that they go in.
He addresses the man behind the counter,"Are you the owner"?
The pharmacist answers, "Yes."
Jacob: "Do you sell heart medication"?
Pharmacist: "Of course we do."
Jacob: "How about medicine for circulation"?
Pharmacist: "All kinds."
Jacob: "Medicine for rheumatism"?
Pharmacist: "Definitely."
Jacob: "Medicine for memory"?
Pharmacist: "Yes, a large variety."
Jacob: "What about vitamins and sleeping pills"?
Pharmacist: "Absolutely."
Jacob: "What about sugar diabetes? We both got bad cases."
Pharmacist: "Oh, but of course. You name it, we have the works."
Jacob: "You have loose bladder and gas pills"?
Pharmacist: "Yes, there are lots of those with plenty of generics."
Jacob: "Perfect! We'd like to register here for our wedding gifts."
_____________
SYDESJOKES LIST
How Not To Bowl
http://www.sydesjokes.com/link2/link001557.html
Kiss Me
http://www.sydesjokes.com/link2/link001556.html
________________
FUN PAGES from Lorraine
Bin Laden Blast
http://tinyurl.com/dcyb3d
Bricks Breaking Hex
http://tinyurl.com/c478fb
Deer Hunt
http://tinyurl.com/cmxvpr
____________
BUFFALO BILL
We are Fucked
http://www.buffaloschips.com/2230503.htm
Hung
http://www.buffaloschips.com/2230504.htm
Chess
http://www.buffaloschips.com/2230509.htm
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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