Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
Eva has been a little disturbed lately that I turn off the TV when
the
phone rings but I don't feel that the people who call should have to
compete with Dora the Explorer.
The other night I was sitting here reading mail and watching the
game show, Cash Cab on the Discovery Channel and Eva came
up with her fake cell phone, chattering away to her imaginary
friend.
She picked up the remote and turned my program off and talked for
another minute before saying good bye and turning my Tv back on.
I was a little annoyed but at least she is picking up proper phone
etiquette.
About 5 minutes later Eva was back with phone in hand and turned the
TV off again but this time before she said goodbye she kissed the
phone. Now at 3 years old I am going to have to deal with imaginary
boyfriends calling at all hours of the day and night. Thank God her
imaginary cell phone has unlimited calling on it.
Enjoy the chips..... buffalo
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Shy Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A shy Welsh village man, Elwyn, noticed that a beautiful girl
had moved in next door. But Elwyn was shy so every time he saw
her in the garden or in the street he couldn't think of what to
say, so he would say 'good morning miss' or 'good afternoon
miss' and hurry off about his business.
He talked to his friend in the bar. "Jones," he said, "a
beautiful girl lives next door to me, but I don't know how to
chat girls up, I've never done it before."
Jones said, "All you have to do is say to her 'good morning miss.
It's a beautiful day isn't it? What beautiful flowers in your
garden.' That will get the conversation going."
Elwyn practiced this in front of a mirror for a few days. Then
one night at the local pub he saw her. Elwyn stood near the bar
trying to pluck up the courage to go and talk to her. He was
nearly ready when the girl got up and went to the washroom.
This is it, thought Elwyn, its now or never. So he stood outside
the washroom and waited. She was ever such a long time that poor
Elwyn was starting to lose his nerve. He was just about to walk
away when the girl came out. There she was, right in front of him
looking beautiful.
Elwyn said, "Erm, erm g-good evening, miss."
She said, "Good evening."
He continued, "It's a b-beautiful day isn't it?"
"Yes," she said, "it is a splendid day."
Encouraged he went on. "I'm your neighbor, and I must tell you
you have a lovely garden."
She smiled, "Thank you. I think so, too."
Stuck for something else to talk about, Elwyn stammered, "Erm,
erm, err, ah, you've just had a shit, have you?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
Anti Bush
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Castrated Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Doc," says Arthur, "I want to be castrated."
"What on earth for?" asks the doctor in
amazement.
"It`s something I`ve been thinking about for
a long time and I want to have it done,"
replies Arthur.
"But have you thought it through properly?"
asks the doctor.
"It`s a very serious operation and once it`s
done, there`s no going back. It will change
your life forever!"
"I`m aware of that and you`re not going to
change my mind - either you book me in to be
castrated or I`ll simply go to another doctor."
"Well, O.K.," says the doctor. "But it`s
against my better judgment!"
So Arthur has his operation, and the next day
he is up and walking very slowly, legs apart,
down the hospital corridor with his dripstand.
Heading toward him is another patient, who is
walking exactly the same way.
"Hi there," says Arthur, "It looks as if you`ve
just had the same operation as me."
"Well," said the patient, "I finally decided
after 37 years of life that I would like to
be circumcised.
Arthur stared at him in horror. "Damn! THAT`S
the word!!!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A woman went to a doctor claiming she had three vaginas!! The doctor
examined her and sure enough, she DID have three vaginas. He`d never
seen such a thing in all his years of medical practice. He told her
"I`ll stitch up two of them, but leave the middle one alone."
"Will that make me normal again?" she asked. "Of course." he said,
"This way, you won`t be screwed left, right and center!"
Candy looked quite depressed. Heidi said, "Candy, sweetie,
what's the matter?"
Candy, "Well, you know that Viagra stuff is around now. I
guess this means we girls can look forward, one day, to
having sex with really old guys."
"Uh, well, yeah, I guess so. But what's the problem?"
Candy cried, "I can just see it now! They'll start hollering,
'Who's your granddaddy! Who's your granddaddy!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sailor Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A very naive British sailor is in a bar in London. He meets
a wild girl, and she takes him upstairs. She takes off her
pants and her panties.
He looks between her legs, and he says, "What's that?"
She says, "It's me lower mouth."
He says, "What do you mean, your 'lower mouth'?"
She says, "Just what I said, it's me lower mouth. It's got
a mustache...it'
He says, "Has it got a tongue in it?"
She says, "Not always."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Lie Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sherry and Christy are having coffee at Starbucks when Sherry says,
"I hear
that
you've been telling people that I'm ugly!"
"Oh, no!," says Christy "I've just been saying that your new hairdo
makes
you look
less attractive."
"I also heard that you've been calling me fat!" says Sherry.
"Oh, no!," says Christy "I just said that the way you wear those
stripes
make you
look larger than you really are."
"I also heard that you're saying that my husband has a wart on his
dick!"
says
Sherry.
"Oh, no!" says Christy. "I only said that it feels like he has a
wart on his
dick!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Short Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A guy walks into a shrink's office complaining of trouble with
women. The
shrinks asks him what he looks for in a woman, and the guy replies,
"Big
tits."
The shrink says, "No, I meant for a serious relationship.
The guy replies, "Oh, seriously big tits."
"No, no, no. I mean what do you look for in the one woman you want
to spend
the rest of your life with?"
The doctor looked kind of worried as the guy just sat there on his
couch
laughing... "Spend the rest of my life with one woman? No woman's
tits are
that big!"
Two guys were out walking their dogs, when one dog wanders off to
pee
against the wall. Like dogs do, it raised it's leg and started to do
his thing.
The second dog then goes up and starts to go exactly where the other
dog did. But instead of raising his leg, he stood up on his hind
legs, put
both paws on the wall and relieved himself.
One guy says to the other, "Wow, how did you teach him to pee like
that?"
The second man replies, "I didn't teach him. He's done it ever since
the wall fell on him!"
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LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-
Hi Everyone
I hope everyone is having a better year now that were into
Spring-Hope you had a wonderful Easter also
,Just wanted to wish everyone a great summer also..
Also Buffalos (Bill's) Birthday is coming up soon on the 20th of
April . So The happiest one to you and many many more !!
Just a reminder if you have any sites you want listed Please do send
them to me at BabyLissa73@
Please send me your sites like this
yourname w/ yoursitename
thentheurl
http://myworld.
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Subscribers and Friends
Melva/His Eye
http://silverandgol
Helene's Place http://groups.
A Mother's Love
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Artwork of Katherine Dinger Via Wesley
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Surfin Surfari
Cook's Recipes
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Coloring Pages
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Ticks
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The world's youngest talented drummer Via Shangy
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The Great Pyramid of Giza Via Wesley
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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
List of HTTP status codes
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ror
Generate a custom packing list for any journey !
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Free CSS Templates
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Movie Clips
R2D2 Does It For The Boobs
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Reparations Dave Chappelle Show
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Rocket Launcher
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Romantic
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Drink Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Drinks of the New Millenium
Absolute Zero........
Alexander the Grrreat....Gin, creme de cacao and sweet cream over
Cornflakes
American in Paris.......
Black Sabbath.....
Blind Faith.......
Blood Clot........
Bloody Awful.......
Blue Moon........
Coleman Cooler......
sand
Fuzzy Naval Base........
George Bush........
Gorbachev...
Honeydew the Dishes......
Marie Antoinette..
Martinizer..
Mary Poppins.....
Mexican Hairless....
Oil of Ole.........
Peter, Paul, and Mary....Potassium nitrate, Paul Masson wine and
tomato
juice
Phillips' Screwdriver.
Port in a Storm.......
Quack Doctor......
A Rum with a View........
Rum-Pole of the Bailey...Bacardi rum, Popov vodka and Bailey's Irish
Cream
Sake-to-me..
Scotch Tapeworm....
Shipwreck...
Short Wave........
pomegranate
Sinead O'Connor....
Skid Roe.........
Sour Kraut.......
Sundae Driver......
Tequila Mockingbird.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm sorry
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funny story
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use a condom
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Kiss
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Nice Tits
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Circumcised
http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A bather whose clothing was strewed
By winds that left her quite nude,
Saw a man come along,
And unless we are wrong
You expected this line to be lewd.
There was a young parson from Harridge,
Tried to grind his betrothed in a carriage. She said,
"No, you young goose,
Just try self-abuse,
And the other we'll try after marriage."
There's an over-sexed lady named Whyte
Who insists on a dozen a night.
A fellow named Cheddar
Had the brashness to wed her-
His chance of survival is slight.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yoshi Blade - Razor Sharp Ceramic Knife
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As a bonus you'll get the Ceramic Potato Peeler.
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
More Good Girls and Bad Girls
Good girls own only one credit card and rarely use it
Bad girls own only one bra and rarely use it
Good girls wear high heels to work
Bad girls wear high heels to bed
Good girls think the office is the wrong place to have a romance
Bad girls think no place is the wrong place
Good girls prefer the missionary position
Bad girls do too, but only for starters
Good girls say no
Bad girls say when?
Good girls go to the party, go home, then go to bed.
Bad girls go to the party, go to bed and then go home.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
TITAN Peeler - The World's Best Peeler!
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*Garnishing Book with tips and tricks on preparing fruits and
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
SAYING GOODBYE TO MOTHER....
You Don't Have To Own A Cat To Appreciate This One! You don't even
have to like 'em!
We were dressed and ready to go out for the New Years Eve Party.
We turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on, covered
our pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard.
We phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi
arrived and we opened the front door to leave the house..
The cat we put out in the yard, scoots back into the house.. We
didn't want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to
eat the bird.
My wife goes out to the taxi, while I went inside to get the cat..
The cat runs upstairs, with me in hot pursuit.
Waiting in the cab, my wife doesn't want the driver to know that the
house will be empty for the night.
So, she explains to the taxi driver that I will be out soon,
'He's just going upstairs to say Goodbye to my Mother.' A few
minutes later, I get into the cab.
'Sorry I took so long,' I said, as we drove away.
'That stupid bitch was hiding under the bed. I had to poke her with
a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off, so I
grabbed her by the neck. Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to
keep her from scratching me. But it worked! I hauled her fat ass
downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!'
The cab driver hit a parked car
.Harveythefrogprinc
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1576
The Float Continued
BJ: The float looks pretty real Katie, guys.
Katie: Watch this father.
Katie pulls out a remote control and presses a button and the Space
Shuttle
spews forth smoke from the back.
BJ: Wow! Impressive.
Katie: And watch this...
Katie presses another button on the remote and the Space Shuttle
lights
up from inside where Rudy and Sandi are wearing Space Suits and are
waving.
Diana: Good one Katie!
Katie: Ah it's nothing, wait a minute and watch me.
Katie dons her space suit that has a rocket pack on the back and....
zoom she slowly drifts upward and then back downward for a soft
landing.
BJ: Incredible..
Diana: Amazing.
Katie: To be sure. Our theme is 89'er day of the past .. yet we
are
looking towards the Future.
Diana: Good thinking.
Katie: Yeah, we are ready. What could go wrong....?
To be continued
The herd in Guthrie
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
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Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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