Adult Adult
Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.
Sorry for all of the late postings. I have been trying to shake the
latest cold that I thought was just sinuses till it got a good hold.
The bad part was it had me so stuffed up that I couldn't sleep
at night so I finally gave in and took Nyquil for the last two
nights
and managed to catch up on my sleep but it leaves me feeling
dragged out the next day. To get the Easter meal out of the way I
bought a spiral sliced ham and a variety of salads and rolls to go
along with it from the Deli. I didn't get an appetite going till
almost midnight so there is almost a whole baked ham in the
refrigerator. I am sure everyone will help finish it when we feel
better. Eva had a great Easter with three baskets and was on a sugar
high most of the day. We did manage to pull off an Easter
egg hunt for her and she helped her mom put stickers on all of the
eggs the night before and she sat here and listened to Jesus Christ
Superstar with me so she got something of the whole Easter
experience.
I want to congratulate our President and Navy for the recovery of
Captain Phillips from Somali Pirates. Perhaps the pirates may
want to start looking for a different job, one with death benefits.
Enjoy your chips and have a great day.... buffalo
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Disney Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
This just in:
Disney to hold press conference at 10:00 a.m. tomorrow. Word on the
street
is that Disney will apologize for the Seven Dwarfs singing "Hi Ho,
Hi
Ho" in
the movie Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
Disney plans to remove all items, currently for sale, associated
with
this
movie. This includes books, dolls, and movies.
Later in the week the Seven Dwarfs will appear on the Al Sharpton
radio show
to apologize and undergo a 7 hour grilling.
Jesse Jackson has not been contacted for comment on this. His office
stated
that he and his personal secretary were attending a meeting in the
Bahamas .
However, people at PUSH hinted that a large protest is being
scheduled at
Disney World.
Snow White could not be reached for comment.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait
Cranky Gardener
http://www.buffalos
<a href=" http://www.buffalos
story
http://www.buffalos
<a href=" http://www.buffalos
Squirrel
http://www.buffalos
<a href=" http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Skin Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Did you know that you can tell from the skin whether a person is
sexually active or not.
1. Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when woman
make love they produce amounts of the hormone estrogen, which make
hair shiny and skin smooth.
2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering
dermatitis, skin rashes and blemishes. The sweat produced cleanses
the pores and makes your skin glow.
3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on during that
romantic dinner.
4. Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and
tones up just about every muscle in the body. It's more enjoyable
than swimming 20 laps, and you don't need special sneakers!
5. Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases the body
endorphin into the bloodstream, producing a sense of e! uphoria and
leaving you with a feeling of well-being.
6. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually
active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called
pheromones. These subtle sex perfumes drive the opposite sex crazy!
7. Sex is the safest tranquiliser in the world. IT IS
10 TIMES MORE EFFECTIVE THAN VALIUM.
8. Kissing each day will keep the dentist away. Kissing encourages
saliva to wash food from the teeth and lowers the level of the acid
that causes decay, preventing plaque build-up.
9. Sex actually relieves headaches. A lovemaking session can release
the tension that restricts blood vessels in the brain.
10. Alot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a national
antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever. ENJOY
SEX!!!!!!!!!
Good Sex *> This message has been sent to you for good luck in sex.
The original is in a room in Palaiseau. It has been sent around the
world nine times. Now the sex has! been sent to you. The "Hot Sex
Fairy" will visit you with in f our days of receiving this message,
provided you, in turn, send it on. If you don't then you will never
receive good sex again for the rest of your life.
You will eventually become celibate, and your genitals will rot and
all off.
This is no joke! Send copies to people you think need sex (who
doesn't?)
Don't send money, as the fate of your genitals has no price. Do not
keep this message.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Earth 4 Energy - Renewable Energy Solutions - Wind And Solar Power!
With the ever increasing costs of living, there is no better time
than right now to stop throwing money out the window and start
generating our own electricity.
Whether you want to simply reduce your power bills or completely
eliminate them - Earth4Energy has a solution for you.
Why pay $1000's for solar or wind power when you can build your own
professional system for less than $200?! (in your own backyard)
That's right, I am going to teach you everything you need to know
about producing your own electricity using solar and wind power.
With my complete step-by-step setup fully illustrated manual + easy
to follow video instructions you will be able to create renewable
energy in your very own backyard!
Let me ask you this question? Why don't you have solar or wind power
at home yet? Is it because you think its too expensive to setup?
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Barbie Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rug Burn Barbie: Comes with raspberries on knees and buttocks.
Lactating Barbie: To be released nine months after Rug Burn Barbie.
Butch Barbie: Comes with short hair and big fingers.
Strap on Barbie: To be used with Butch Barbie.
Backdoor Barbie: Comes locked in one position with small bottle of
K-Y Jelly.
Crack Whore Barbie: Comes with track marks, cold sores, and matted
hair.
Body Piercing Barbie: Comes with optional labia rings
(also available in two-pack with Crack Whore Barbie.
Oral Barbie: Comes with a permanent expression of surprise.
And the number one Barbie I'd like to see on shelves in time for the
holiday season:
S & M Barbie: Comes with retractable whip sticking out of her ass.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A free scan is now available to detect harmful errors that can slow
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Flying Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The United Airline's passenger cabin was being served by an
obviously gay flight attendant who seemed to put everyone into a
good mood as he served them food and drinks.
As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle
and announced to the passengers, "Captain Marvey has asked me to
announce that he'll be landing this big scary plane shortly, lovely
people, so if you could just put up your tray tables that would be
super." On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed that a well
dressed, rather exotic looking woman hadn't moved a muscle.
"Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines sweet lady.
I had asked you to raise your trazy-poo so the main man can
pitty-pat us on the ground.
" She calmly turned her head and said, "In my country, I am called a
Princess. I take orders from no one."
To which the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat,
"Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country, I'm called a Queen, so I out
rank you. Put the tray up, Bitch."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Copy That Game - The Easiest Way To Copy Games
If you want to make back up copies of your games then the
CopyThatGame system is the best way to do it.
Our system breaks through the latest "Unbreakable Protection"
easily, all you have to do is follow either the video or text
tutorial. In these tutorials I show you step by step how to make
back copies of all your video games.
Don't wait till the next time you scratch or lose your favorite
game:
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alligator Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man walks into a bar, with a huge alligator on a leash. He walks
over to the bar, and orders a beer. The bartender says "Sorry sir.
You can't bring that alligator in here! It's a dangerous animal, and
you're scaring all of the patrons!" Sure enough. The man looked
around and noticed that everyone was standing on the tables, looking
very nervous. "But wait!" he cried. "This alligator is tame. It
wouldn't hurt anyone." However, the bartender is adamant. The man
continues, "If I can prove that t his alligator is not vicious, can
he stay?" "Well, I guess so," says the bartender, "however, you're
going to have a devil of a time proving to everyone here that your
alligator is tame!"
The man smiles, and leans over the alligator. "Ralph!" he shouts.
"Sit up." With that, he beats the alligator on the head with his
fist. BANG. BANG. BANG. And the alligator rears up on its tail.
"Ralph, open your mouth." BANG. BANG. BANG.
And the alligator opened its huge mouth wide, revealing row upon row
of gleaming white teeth. The man pulls out his penis, and lays it in
the alligator's mouth, as the entire bar crowd gasps. "Ralph! Close
your mouth, but don't bite." BANG. BANG. BANG.
As the man pummels the alligator on the head, the giant mouth slowly
closes, and stops just short of biting the guy's penis off. The
crowd sighs, and the man says, "Ralph, open your mouth." BANG. BANG.
BANG. The alligator's mouth opens wide again.
"There," says the man to the crowd. "Now would anyone else like to
try this?" A blonde in the back says, "Yeah, I'll try. But only if
your promise not to hit me on the head so hard."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Electricity4Gas - Electric Car Conversion Manual.
With the ever increasing costs of gas there is no better time then
right now to start running your own car on electricity.
Why worry about reducing your gas bills, when you can completely
eliminate them!
Why pay $1000's for an electric car conversion or a new electric car
when you can build your own professional system for less than $300!
Electricity4Gas is going to teach you everything you need to know
about powering your own car with electricity. With my complete
step-by-step setup manual you will be able to create your electric
car in your own garage or backyard!
Let me ask you this question? Why don't you have an electric car
yet? Is it because you think it's too expensive?
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Random Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Billy Bob and Lester were talking one afternoon when Billy
Bob tells Lester, "Ya know, I reckon I'm about ready for a vacation.
Only this year I'm gonna do it a little different. The last few
years, I took your suggestions as to where to go. Three years ago
you said to go to Hawaii. I went to Hawaii and Betty Sue got
pregnant.
Then two years ago, you told me to go to the Bahamas, and Betty Sue
got pregnant again. Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if
Betty Sue didn't get pregnant again."
Lester asks Billy Bob, "So, what you gonna do this year that's
different?"
Billy Bob says, "This year I'm taking Betty Sue WITH me."
******
Ida Mae passed away and Bubba called 911. The 911-operator
told Bubba that she would send someone out right away. "Where do you
live?" asked the operator. Bubba replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus
Drive." The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?" After a
long pause, Bubba said, "How 'bout I drag her over to Oak Street and
you pick her up there?"
******
Know why they raised the minimum drinking age in Tennessee
to 32?
They wanted to keep alcohol out of the high schools.
******
What do they call reruns of "Hee Haw" in Mississippi? Documentaries.
******
Where was the toothbrush invented?
Arkansas. If it were invented anywhere else, it would have been
called a teethbrush.
******
Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Tennessee State Lottery?
The winner gets $3 a year for a million years.
*******
A new law was recently passed in North Carolina so that
when a couple gets divorced, they're still brother and sister.
******
What do a divorce in Alabama, a tornado in Kansas and a hurricane in
Florida have in common? No matter what, somebody's fixin' to lose a
trailer.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tool Band-It" - Now a job for 2 can be done by 1!
Billy Mays uses Tool Band-It" to keep all his tools and parts within
reach! Only $19.95 plus FREE Bonus Head Lamp!
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Light Weight & Flexible
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
LynnLynn's Links
~~~~~~~~~~~~
If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Subscribers and Friends
Melva/A Courtship
http://silverandgol
Brother Bob's Poems Of The Week!:
http://ministry-
HE'S ALIVE http://summerhoosie
"TRIBUTE TO EASTER 2009 by Scarlet"
http://piratevoyage
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Your PC may be suffering from serious file errors in your WINDOWS
registry which may be the reason why your PC is running so slow, or
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Below are instructions that will enable you to Increase Your
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then it may be in your computer's best interest to fix the
potentially harmful file errors in your registry.
Press below to launch the Diagnostics Test download now:
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*+*+*+*+*+*+
Surfin Surfari
Free Medical and Dental Help Via Carol
http://www.freemedi
Fashion Designer Game
http://www.y8.
Create a new caricature Via Cathy
http://www.magixl.
Zip Code Finder Via Wesley
http://www.zipskinn
*+*+*+*+*+*+
You probably think I've lost my mind - and maybe I have - but just
visit this site right now and in 5 minutes you''ll have this awesome
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Why am I giving this away?
I finally got so sick and tired of watching fakers and bigmouths
sell wrong information about how to make a fortune online... that
I've to decided give away my awesome Internet Business Training
System so I can help people finally get the truth!
See... I've made a fortune online and I've helped over 100,000
customers to unlock the secrets to getting started online - the
right way.
Press here to Grab it quick - right now - before I change my mind...
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*+*+*+*+*+*+
Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)
Welcome to Opera 9.6 Web browser
http://www.opera.
Generate Random Nonsense Posters
http://www.typogene
Generate Random Nonsense Posters
http://www.typogene
*+*+*+*+*+*+
Here is some more information about this new way to watch
television:
1) All of the programming is uncensored!
2) There are hundreds of channels from around the world to watch!
And new channels are added every day!
3) Hundreds of Radio stations to listen to anytime, all of the time!
And new stations are added daily!
4) All of these channels are available 24 hours per day right from
your PC and laptop!
5) No additional hardware is needed!
6) You won't have to pay a cable or satellite bill any longer!
Press Here For More Information and To Download Now:
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*+*+*+*+*+*+
Animal World
Doggie Zone Bo
http://www.msnbc.
Kitty Korner
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*+*+*+*+*+*+
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Does your computer seem to be running slower than usual? Well, if
you've downloaded any music, movie clips, or games in the past 2
months, then your computer may be infected with "Ad-Ware" and
"Spy-Ware"!
Advertisers use downloadable music as a vehicle to "legally" add
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computer, then here's your chance to scan your computer at no
charge.
Press Here to Begin Scan (YOU WILL NOT BE CHARGED FOR THIS):
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*+*+*+*+*+*+
Movie Clips
Walk It Out Granny
http://www.buffalos
Water Park Prank
http://www.buffalos
wdrb
http://www.buffalos
We Need This Here
http://www.buffalos
What Every Man Wants In Bed
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WHAT_HAPPENS_
http://www.buffalos
What The Hells That
http://www.buffalos
Why I Go To Weddings
http://www.buffalos
Why Buy Expensive Toys
http://www.buffalos
Why Girls Shouldn't Fire Handguns
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Why I Didn't Make The Olymics
http://www.buffalos
Why I Don't Fish
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Why I Was Never Late For School
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~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jerking Off Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
THE DO'S AND DON'TS OF JERKING OFF!
Do jerk off as much as you like.
Don't worry you won't go blind from jerking off unless you shoot
sperm in your eye.
Do try to put yourself in an area where you won't be caught.
Do have a place to shoot your load already set up.
Do hide your spankerchief so no one can find it.
Do jerk off in the shower, as this will hide any and all evidence of
your perverted behavior.
Do drink cranberry juice as often as you can. This builds up your
sperm count incredibly!
Don't get sperm on yourself.
Don't shoot your load on a thick rug and then try to clean it up
with toilet paper.
Don't hold your load in as long as you can in hopes that you'll
shoot it across the room. This can cause irreversible damage to your
johnson.
Don't flex your legs too hard before you blow your load or you'll
get a cramp and ruin the moment.
Don't use your porn magazines as your spankerchief. That is future
jerk off material and if you spunk in it, you won't be able to use
it again!
Don't ever jerk off while taking a shit. That is fucking disgusting!
Don't attempt to stick your finger in your ass while jerking off.
That would make you gay. (Not that there's anything wrong with that)
Don't use Icy Hot for lubrication!
Don't, under any circumstances, try to shoot your load into your own
mouth! (unless you're gay then it's ok)
Don't participate in any group jerk off sessions or any circle jerk
events. If you do, don't get anyone else's sperm on you.
Heather
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Each Forged Stainless Steel Knife Set includes:
* 10 in Carving Knife
* 9 in Bread Knife
* 8 in Chef's Knife
* 5 in Utility Knife
* 3.5 in Paring Knife
Features of Roberto-Rossi Professional, Forged Stainless Steel knife
sets:
* Each knife is hand crafted
* Made of high quality stainless steel for an excellent degree of
sharpness
* Forged for perfect weight, balance and overall feel
* Conveniently, dishwasher safe
* 30-day 100% Satisfaction Guarantee try them in your home for 30
days and if you don't absolutely love them, just send them right
back to us
Free Magic Chopper the Magic Chopper is one of the best kitchen
inventions we have ever seen. This product will chop your vegetable
prep time in half.
Turn cooking into a joy with the best knife set you will ever own
and surprise your Mom with a gift she will be using every day for
years to come. Order Now!
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Toon Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Your fault
http://www.buffalos
<a href=" http://www.buffalos
Texas limo
http://www.buffalos
<a href=" http://www.buffalos
Tampax
http://www.buffalos
<a href=" http://www.buffalos
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Windshield Wonder is the easy reach microfiber window cleaner that
eliminates straining and stretching. It uses a 16" handle to help
reach all the way down to the dash and base of your rear window.
Windshield Wonder is also perfect for moisture and fog removal.
Get two for the price of one when you order today.
Order now
View Web Version
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Limerick Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
There was a young lassie from Morton,
who had one long tit and one short 'en,
on top of all that,
a great hairy twat,
and a fart like a six fifty Norton.
There once was a Playboy Bunny
Who had a pretty blond cunnie
She'd jump straight to bed
Her legs she would spread
With a cunt that tasted like honey
<Snagged by>
Ross
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yoshi Blade - Razor Sharp Ceramic Knife
Introducing the razor-sharp, feather-light ceramic slicing knife.
Unlike steel knife blades, YoshiBlade stay razor sharp. In fact,
this space-age material is so hard that professional chefs use
ceramic to sharpen their steel knives.
Say goodbye to old fashioned steel knives.
As a bonus you'll get the Ceramic Potato Peeler.
View Web Version
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Parting Chips
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Top Ten Signs Your Kid's School Is Too Crowded
10. Kid comes home happy saying, "I got to ride inside the bus
today!" 9. Principal sends you a warning -- he's not skipping class
enough 8. Teacher needs a U-Haul to bring home the book reports 7.
Losing 60 to 70 kids on class trip is considered "successful" 6.
School play is "The Ten Commandments"
all 100,000 Hebrews 5. Class photo taken using government weather
satellite 4. The teacher calls out, "Gus Van Rauschenbach" and 17
kids say, "Here" 3. Last spring's school bake sale brought in one
and a quarter million 2. There's a waiting list to get your ass
kicked by the school bully 1. The kids actually outnumber the
roaches.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Micro Force is the world's smallest fully waterproof and
rechargeable electric shaver.
The rechargeable battery last up to 10 times longer than a standard
battery shaver.
With the Micro Force shaver being smaller than a credit card,
it makes it the perfect shaver for traveling or every day use.
Additional Ordering Details:
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bonus Chip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bill decided to try his hand at a new job and secured one as a used
car salesman. He had no experience in this field but he figured he
could use the old sales pitch that the car was "like brand-new" and
had only been driven by a little old lady on Sundays.
He tried that approach on every prospective buyer but none seemed to
believe him and no sales were made that day. The following day he
decided to change his sales pitch and sure enough he sold three
cars. The manager of the used car dealership called him over and
asked what he had done to bring about all these sales.
Bill grinned, "Well they didn't believe my little old lady story, so
I told them that the car had previously been owned by a nymphomaniac
who only used the back seat."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
TITAN Peeler - The World's Best Peeler!
The Titan Peeler is the world's best peeler. Made of long lasting,
dishwasher safe Stainless steel it has no equal. Long lasting blades
help cut vegetables quickly and easily and slice both hard and soft
cheese perfectly, every time. Each Peeler has dual action motion to
cut the peeling time in-half. Don't waste anymore time! Order
yours today!
What you get
*Handle and cutting/peeling blade.
*Julienne Blade for perfect julienne slices of your favorite
vegetables every time.
*Slicing Board that turns the Titan Peeler into the perfect slicer.
*Garnishing Book with tips and tricks on preparing fruits and
vegetables.
http://buffaloschip
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katie's Komfort Kolumn
Vol 1570
Kamping
Darkness falls..
BJ is in his pup tent with Sandi snuggled up.
BJ: I guess Katie and Rudy are still running around.
Sandi: I guess so. Could you hand me another potato chip daddy?
BJ: With dip?
Sandi: Naturally.
BJ: Here you go.
Munch munch...
BJ: It is late. Let's go outside and see if we can find this
rascals.
Sandi: Okay.
Outside they wander around to no avail.
BJ: Maybe they are in Katie's tent.
They enter Katie's tent and see the tent has carpeted floor, air
conditioning. Rudy is sitting in a recliner watching a 60" plasma TV
while Katie is lounging on a couch.
Rudy: Yeah, I can dig camping.
Katie rings a bell: Horace could you bring some more bubbly and
some caviar please.
Horace: Right away ma'am.
Katie: This is the life.
To be continued
The Herd in Guthrie
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Adult Adult Adult
Remember 9/11/01
Regarding any problems unsubscribing this mailing list
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Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783
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