THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
It is an undoubted truth, that the less
one has to do, the less time one
finds to do it in.
~Earl of Chesterfield
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
Recently, California had a series of small earthquakes.
Some were thought to be oscullatory, while others were
believed to be trepidatory.. It occurred to me that
most people might be confused about this, so I thought
it wise to let everyone know the difference.
What's the difference between an oscillatory and a
trepidatory earthquake?
1. This calculation is just for engineers:
2. And this one is for laymen -- like you:
3. This is a trepidatory earthquake -- an up and down movement.....
4.This is an oscillatory earthquake -- a side to side movement...
5.And this is a combination of both trepidatory and oscillatory:
Isn't science beautiful when properly explained?
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
_____________
THE COMICS
beware
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e031.html
wanted
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e032.html
qualified
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e033.html
words
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e034.html
life
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e035.html
you call it
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e036.html
invention
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e037.html
coast guard approved
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e038.html
life explained
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e039.html
my ass
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/e040.html
_____________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
holy s**t !!!
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/891.html
one night on Jay Lenno
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/892.html
married
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/893.html
sexy in my swimsuit
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/894.html
pantie prank
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/895.html
________________
POWER POINT DISPLAYS
Ana and Carol
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/fpe/ppd639.html
A 54 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken
to the hospital. While on the operating table she
had a near death experience.. Seeing God she
asked "Is my time up?" God said, "No, you have
another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."
Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the
hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast
implants and a tummy tuck. She even had someone
come in and change her hair color and brighten her
teeth! Since she had so much more time to live, she
figured she might as well make the most of it.
After her last operation, she was released from the
hospital. While crossing the street on her way home,
she was killed by an ambulance. Arriving in front
of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had
Another 43 years? Why didn't you pull me from out
of the path of the ambulance?"
God replied: "Shit! I didn't recognize you."
_______________
George took a sip of his beer, then replied,
"I guess you could say that my
wife makes love like a chess player."
"A chess player?" *
"Yeah. Every twenty minutes, she moves."
___________
Dear Mom and Dad,
Our scoutmaster told us to write to our parents
in case you saw the flood on TV and are worried.
We are OK. Only one of our tents and 2 sleeping
bags got washed away. Luckily, none of us got drowned
because we were all up on the mountain looking
for Chad when it happened. Oh yes, please call
Chad's mother and tell her he is OK. He can't
write because of the cast. I got to ride in one of
the search and rescue jeeps. It was neat. We never
would have found him in the dark if it hadn't been
for the lightning. Scoutmaster Walt got mad at
Chad for going on a hike alone without telling anyone.
Chad said he did tell him, but it was during the
fire so he probably didn't hear him. Did you know
that if you put gas on a fire, the gas can will blow up?
The wet wood didn't burn, but one of the tents did.
*Also some of our clothes. David is going to look
weird until his hair grows back. We will be home on
Saturday if Scoutmaster Walt gets the car fixed.
It wasn't his fault about the wreck. The brakes
worked OK when we left. Scoutmaster Walt said that
a car that old you have to expect something
to break down; that's probably why he can't get insurance.
We think it's a neat car. He doesn't care if we get it dirty and
if it's hot, sometimes he lets us ride on the fenders.
It gets pretty hot with 10 people in a car. He lets us take
turns riding in the trailer until the highway patrolman
stopped and talked to us. Scoutmaster Walt is a neat guy.
Don't worry, he is a good driver. In fact, he is teaching
Terry how to drive on the mountain roads where there
isn't any traffic. All we ever see up there are logging trucks.
This morning all of the guys were diving off the rocks and
swimming out in the lake. Scoutmaster Walt wouldn't let me
because I can't swim and Chad was afraid he would sink because
of his cast, so he let us take the canoe across the lake.
It was great. You can still see some of the trees under
the water from the flood. Scoutmaster Walt isn't crabby
like some scoutmasters. He didn't even get mad about
the life jackets. He has to spend a lot of time working
on the car so we are trying not to cause him any trouble.
Guess what? We have all passed our first aid merit badges.
When Dave dove in the lake and cut his arm, we got to see
how a *tourniquet works. Wade and I threw up, but
Scoutmaster Walt said it probably was just food poisoning
from the leftover chicken. He said they got sick
that way with food they ate in prison. I'm so glad he
got out and became our scoutmaster. He said he sure
figured out how to get things done better while he was
doing his time. By the way, what is a pedophile?
I have to go now. We are going to town to mail our letters
and buy Vaseline. Don't worry about anything. We are fine.
Love, Cole
______________
A kind-hearted motorist saw a man struggling to change
a tire alongside the highway, and pulled over to see
whether he could help. The man had a very red face, and
a dark smear across it where he'd wiped off sweat with
dirty hands. His tie was undone and his shirt collar askew,
and it was clear he had also wiped his hands on his
once-white shirt. Close to him stood an immaculately neat
woman who was speaking in quick, agitated tones.
"Hello, there," said the motorist. "Say, I've changed a
lot of tires...maybe I can help here."
"You sure can," the man with the flat tire replied wearily.
"My wife is an expert, too. If you will just do all the
arguing with her about how this tire ought to be changed,
I can concentrate on the dirty work and get the job done."
BUFFALO BILL
Drunk trust
http://www.buffaloschips.com/83103.htm
How to drive a hummer in Iraq
http://www.buffaloschips.com/83104.htm
How to peel a banana
http://www.buffaloschips.com/83105.htm
______
FUN PAGES
Killer Bugs
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=41428&s=n
New York Street Signs
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=42400&s=n
Average Lifespan
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=42407&s=n
Lion Fights
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3456&pid=42351&s=n
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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